All you douchebags who say I'm a moron, no, I'm not a moron. I told my girlfriend the answer to her question. Lying is number 1 on her list of things she hates.
Also, we both have a mutual friend who actually tried to go out with her at the beginning of the year. He now has a girlfriend though. And I would have absolutely NO problem with her staying there, as I trust her 100%.
Also, I don't know who said it, but yes, she has been cheated on in the past. (Well, he tried to cheat on her, he just sucked at it. :/ )
[quote name='kilm']You made a lot of mistakes, and if both of you were older, the problem would somewhat clear itself up.
Because both of you are young, don't necessarily expect or seek out reason and logic as a source of explanation. Her feelings are going to be "Because this is the way I feel and I feel strongly about it" and leave it at that. No explanation, just the way she feels and you should accept it as it is.
If you actually are unhappy with your decision and you need to rethink your relationship and see if it is worth continuing. What if another situation like this arises or a different one? Will she continue to "control" your actions? Are you comfortable with it? How serious is this "trust" issue?
So on a personal perspective, you could have gone and force your GF in an uncomfortable situation and have her understand you and accept your reasoning.
In the relationship perspective, if you want to maintain the relationship for a lengthy period of time, do everything you can to make her feel that she's in the right, or else it will come back to bite you in the butt. You were totally in the wrong to say that it doesn't matter if she had a sleepover with a guy friend. The crush thing doesn't really help, either. No matter how you feel, whether or not it's the truth, you must say it's an issue and take her perspective. It was a step in the right direction to not have gone, but you might have already been in a lose-lose situation once you expressed interest in going and making excuses to go and this might be a significant issue to her.
Remember, you're only 18 years old, sometimes you'll make good decisions, sometimes you'll make bad decisions, and we'll see whether or not this will end up being a good decision. And because you're young, even if this is a bad decision or you were in a lose-lose, you'll bounce back. Young kids are resilient.
Or else you could compromise and play Rockband with your friend, but not spend the night, if that's what you want to do.[/QUOTE]
Yes, the whole problem here is that I felt she was 'controlling' me. I understand that there's a lot of weirdness in the situation. But, I still want her to be able to trust me. The night I was at the sleepover, she hung out with her mos recent ex-boyfriend, ALONE, and I had no problem with it, because I trust her. (And, if she does cheat on me, her loss. I treat my girlfriends like queens.)
Anyway, in the end, I talked about the 'controlling' situation, and said that it would probably break us up, and she gave in instantly. Not exactly what I wanted though. I wanted to just talk things through, but she instantly gave it and wouldn't talk about it anymore.
Anyway, it's done and over with. I could have probably handled it better, but in the context of our relationship, I thought I did pretty good. And I don't want to hear anymore "you're stupid" comments, as you guys don't know the whole story, and can't really make that assumption.
it.
