Retail Employee Stories Part 7: "I'm Not Supposed To Be Here Today!"

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[quote name='DarkRider23']So... I was closing up shop at my store today (Blockbuster) and it was about 11:15. I had finished counting all the money, locked the safe and started putting away some games when all of a sudden, I hear a pounding on the door. It's some asshole who wants to come in and rent movies. He continues trying to open the door like a moron and I just point at the sign where our hours are shown.

He then flips me off. I have no idea why, either. The sign clearly states we close at 11 and it was past that already... He starts walking away and then he turns around and does one of those "I'm really pissed off at you, so I'm going to flip you the bird with all the might in my body." I was just laughing. The guy was making an ass of himself for no reason. I kind of felt bad for the lady friend that was with him. She was pretty good looking too. It was a great way to end a great night.[/QUOTE]
That's happened at my work, but I was in the back doing the paperwork. My coworker was up front cleaning and this guy was rattling the door for a good minute like it was going to magically open. The guy spots my coworker and decides to rattle it harder and bang on the class.

Coworker: Sorry, we've been closed for 10 minutes.
Man: LET ME IN.
Coworker: Come back tomorrow.
Man: NO, NOW.
Coworker: All the registers are closed out.
Man: F U. OPEN THE DOOR ASSHOLE.
Coworker: With that attitude, no. Get the hell out of here.
Man: THEN COME OUT AND FIGHT ME RIGHT NOW.
Coworker: *cracks knuckles* I'm off in 5-10. If you want your ass beat down, stick around.
Man: ... F U. *walks away*
 
Back when I worked at a rather small convenience store, I once had a guy come knocking at around fifteen minutes after close (close time is midnight). Door was fully locked, and he wanted me to open up so he could buy some coffee. Not freshly-made or even day-old coffee, but coffee grounds. And not Folger's or whatever, but the properly portioned packets we use to make our giant pots of coffee. Claimed he was aiming for some Guiness' World Record for coffee collecting. Flashed me a few packets of McDonald's brand coffee.

Needless to say, I thought he was a certifiable loon and/or trying to rob us. Luckily he left while I was in the freezer inventory'ing the cold dairy products.
 
Back in the day I used to work at the evil empire known as Gamestop and I have a couple of gems but there are 2 stories that stand out in particular.

The first story: I used to work in a mall store and at this point in time I was the ASM. We had a guy who used to come to the mall all the time and never bought anything. This guy was always dirty and stunk to high hell so I am guessing he was homeless. One day the guy comes into the store and asked if we can give him change for a dollar. Neither me or the associate in the store had any change on us and we couldn't open the register (our LP guy was a real dick about no sales) so I explained to the guy that we didn't have any change on us and we couldn't open the register. The guy got really pissed off and proceeded to scream his head off at my associate (who was a rather small and timid fellow). I stepped in and explained to the guy if he continued and I am gonna have to call security and told him to get out. The homeless dude proceeded to stand in my store entrance, drop his pants and proceeded to jam his thumb up his ass and ran out screaming "ASSHOLE, ASSHOLE" down the hall past the children's play area, all while still self examining his prostate.

2nd story: It was the first christmas season that the DS came out, and naturally we and everyone else were sold out the week before Christmas came. I had this chubby little boy come into my store and ask me for a DS. Now I love kids naturally and he was a somewhat regular customer so I explained to him that we were sold out and offered to hold one when they came in our next shipment. He then asked me to go in the back and make him one. I kind of chuckled and chalked it up to him being 10-11 years old and told him I couldn't. He started screaming at me and demanded that I make him one now. So at this point I tell him to go get his mother (who was in Lord & Taylor down the hall) He comes back like 20 minutes later with his mom and I was in the back. The mother asked to speak to me so I came out to talk to her. I explained that we were sold out and I would hold the next DS that came in for her, all the while the kid was still screaming his head off. So the mother pulled me to the side to talk some more( I am thinking she is going to give me a number to call her when the DS came in) but she actually looked me square in the eye and told me she would pay me double what the system was worth if I just went in the back and made it for her. Now the kid I can understand, but a grown woman asking me that!? So I keep my cool and explain to her we don't make them. She got really pissed off and then told me that I was just being a lazy spic andto take my ass back there and make her one. At that point the gloves were off. I look at the woman and ask her how tall I was. She responded. I then asked her if I had pointy ears, she said no. Then I asked if I was wearing a green and red hat, kind of dumbfounded, she responded no. I then tell her that we have both established that I am not one of Santa's elves and I am not gonna make a damn thing for her! At that point I told her to take her son and never shop in my store again....ahhhhh good times, good times.
 
[quote name='Skooba81']2nd story: It was the first christmas season that the DS came out, and naturally we and everyone else were sold out the week before Christmas came. I had this chubby little boy come into my store and ask me for a DS. Now I love kids naturally and he was a somewhat regular customer so I explained to him that we were sold out and offered to hold one when they came in our next shipment. He then asked me to go in the back and make him one. I kind of chuckled and chalked it up to him being 10-11 years old and told him I couldn't. He started screaming at me and demanded that I make him one now. So at this point I tell him to go get his mother (who was in Lord & Taylor down the hall) He comes back like 20 minutes later with his mom and I was in the back. The mother asked to speak to me so I came out to talk to her. I explained that we were sold out and I would hold the next DS that came in for her, all the while the kid was still screaming his head off. So the mother pulled me to the side to talk some more( I am thinking she is going to give me a number to call her when the DS came in) but she actually looked me square in the eye and told me she would pay me double what the system was worth if I just went in the back and made it for her. Now the kid I can understand, but a grown woman asking me that!? So I keep my cool and explain to her we don't make them. She got really pissed off and then told me that I was just being a lazy spic andto take my ass back there and make her one. At that point the gloves were off. I look at the woman and ask her how tall I was. She responded. I then asked her if I had pointy ears, she said no. Then I asked if I was wearing a green and red hat, kind of dumbfounded, she responded no. I then tell her that we have both established that I am not one of Santa's elves and I am not gonna make a damn thing for her! At that point I told her to take her son and never shop in my store again....ahhhhh good times, good times.[/QUOTE]

If I were you in that situation, I would have told the lady one moment and came back with a totally different game system. If she really thought that you could make a DS on the spot, I would have taken the chance just for the fun of it, and given her a Gameboy SP for the reaction. Could you imagine her walking out of the store with a gameboy? I would accept getting fired if she were to walk out with it, even if she brings it back right away realizing that the picture does not match the product, I think I would have laughed myself to death.

You can't even really blame the kid in that situation who knows maybe the mom raised the kid telling him they made products on the spot in the back.
 
[quote name='Skooba81']Back in the day I used to work at the evil empire known as Gamestop and I have a couple of gems but there are 2 stories that stand out in particular.

The first story: I used to work in a mall store and at this point in time I was the ASM. We had a guy who used to come to the mall all the time and never bought anything. This guy was always dirty and stunk to high hell so I am guessing he was homeless. One day the guy comes into the store and asked if we can give him change for a dollar. Neither me or the associate in the store had any change on us and we couldn't open the register (our LP guy was a real dick about no sales) so I explained to the guy that we didn't have any change on us and we couldn't open the register. The guy got really pissed off and proceeded to scream his head off at my associate (who was a rather small and timid fellow). I stepped in and explained to the guy if he continued and I am gonna have to call security and told him to get out. The homeless dude proceeded to stand in my store entrance, drop his pants and proceeded to jam his thumb up his ass and ran out screaming "ASSHOLE, ASSHOLE" down the hall past the children's play area, all while still self examining his prostate.

2nd story: It was the first christmas season that the DS came out, and naturally we and everyone else were sold out the week before Christmas came. I had this chubby little boy come into my store and ask me for a DS. Now I love kids naturally and he was a somewhat regular customer so I explained to him that we were sold out and offered to hold one when they came in our next shipment. He then asked me to go in the back and make him one. I kind of chuckled and chalked it up to him being 10-11 years old and told him I couldn't. He started screaming at me and demanded that I make him one now. So at this point I tell him to go get his mother (who was in Lord & Taylor down the hall) He comes back like 20 minutes later with his mom and I was in the back. The mother asked to speak to me so I came out to talk to her. I explained that we were sold out and I would hold the next DS that came in for her, all the while the kid was still screaming his head off. So the mother pulled me to the side to talk some more( I am thinking she is going to give me a number to call her when the DS came in) but she actually looked me square in the eye and told me she would pay me double what the system was worth if I just went in the back and made it for her. Now the kid I can understand, but a grown woman asking me that!? So I keep my cool and explain to her we don't make them. She got really pissed off and then told me that I was just being a lazy spic andto take my ass back there and make her one. At that point the gloves were off. I look at the woman and ask her how tall I was. She responded. I then asked her if I had pointy ears, she said no. Then I asked if I was wearing a green and red hat, kind of dumbfounded, she responded no. I then tell her that we have both established that I am not one of Santa's elves and I am not gonna make a damn thing for her! At that point I told her to take her son and never shop in my store again....ahhhhh good times, good times.[/QUOTE]

You should have come out with a gamecube and said "Damn, I made the wrong system and I only had enough parts to make 1. I'm sorry, our next shipment of parts is (day ds shipment was to come in). Come back then and we'll already have it made for you in a decorative box that says Nintendo on it.
 
[quote name='kyleboller']I don't even think you understand what you just posted, but I can tell you I am not too lazy to browse the thread. The post I quoted and responded to was found on page 6 or 7 moron[/QUOTE]

Is there a reason why you continue to be a fucking douchebag?
 
[quote name='DuelLadyS']I love how you say you 'hate to sound like an ass', then proceed to say my fiance must look like a godawful nerd or a lousy shitbag, but I digress.[/quote]

No, I did no such thing--but you just did in that post

I assume when you go to pick up something from a store (ANY store, this isnt just about games), you will walk at a leisurely pace, look over the shelves for awhile, find the item(s), and make your way to the front. In other words, you will browse a bit.
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that's called shopping, it's what women and nancy's do. most people who want something will get it as quick as possible, whether that means going to a store or ordering from somehwere.

Thus, the conclusion that it's a 'confidence' issue- if you shop like you know what you want, know where it is, and you're in a hurry to get it, you must be an employee.
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I'm not sure that being an efficient at something makes you seem like you're working. Alot of people like to get in and out whenever they are buying something.

Time is money.

I mean I could walk into a gynecologist's office, put some women's feet in the stirrups and get to work, but would anyone mistake me for a gynecologist?

Possibly--but that is besides the point. People have things to do, even if that means they have video games to play or other equally ridiculous shit. They don't need to waste time dillying around the damn walmart or gamestop or bestbuy. If someone knows what they want then they should (and for the most part, do) get it as soon as they can.

The ephemeral nature of happiness should be reason enough to understand that you shouldn't care if you look like a POS warcraft player working at ebgames when you take the a copy of the new expansion that you stashed behind a display of Microsoft Flight Simulator 2010 to the counter only 30 seconds after clocking out. Play the god damn game and don't worry if you look like a shitbag of a nerd of an EBgames employee, it'll all be over in an instant.
 
[quote name='Guerrilla']
Man: THEN COME OUT AND FIGHT ME RIGHT NOW.
Coworker: *cracks knuckles* I'm off in 5-10. If you want your ass beat down, stick around.[/QUOTE]

this might sound off but that coworker line and your avatar are almost a hilarious combination--iexcept for the sign being one found roadside and the bloody fist print being one that was techo-pumped onto the sign, rather than being an inaccurately and angrily punched onto the sign
 
[quote name='Salamando3000']Back when I worked at a rather small convenience store, I once had a guy come knocking at around fifteen minutes after close (close time is midnight). Door was fully locked, and he wanted me to open up so he could buy some coffee. Not freshly-made or even day-old coffee, but coffee grounds. And not Folger's or whatever, but the properly portioned packets we use to make our giant pots of coffee. Claimed he was aiming for some Guiness' World Record for coffee collecting. Flashed me a few packets of McDonald's brand coffee.[/quote]

I thought he was a certifiable loon and/or trying to rob us. Luckily he left while I was in the freezer inventory'ing the cold dairy products.
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that's hilarious. you ended up at the same place you would have been if you had let him in...of coure you would be locked in on the bad scenario
 
[quote name='Skooa81']2nd story: It was the first christmas season that the DS came out, and naturally we and everyone else were sold out the week before Christmas came. I had this chubby little boy come into my store and ask me for a DS. Now I love kids naturally and he was a somewhat regular customer so I explained to him that we were sold out and offered to hold one when they came in our next shipment. He then asked me to go in the back and make him one. I kind of chuckled and chalked it up to him being 10-11 years old and told him I couldn't. He started screaming at me and demanded that I make him one now.[/QUOTE]

sounds like that fat merman thurman kid but I seriously doubt that a. the mom asked you to make her a game boy and b. that you sarcastically asked the women if you were a short elf person
 
ATTN: kyleboller

There's a feature on CAG called "multi quote." In fact the button to it looks like this:

multiquote_off.gif


Can you please use this said feature instead of making four separate posts? Thanks so much in advance.

Signed,

Everyone Else In This Thread
 
[quote name='kyleboller']sounds like that fat merman thurman kid but I seriously doubt that a. the mom asked you to make her a game boy and b. that you sarcastically asked the women if you were a short elf person[/QUOTE]

Doubt me if you want I am not about to sit here and make up a story for no reason. By nature I am a very sarcastic person and when this woman insulted my heritage the only thing I can think of that wouldn't get me fired and/or arrested was to do something that would totally confuse her and make her leave. And yes she did ask me to go make a DS for her, I couldn't believe it myself and I was the one standing in front of her
 
[quote name='Indiana Jones']^ If it were Oprah who wanted into a closed store with closed out cash registers, the store would be called racist for denying her.[/QUOTE]

If it was Oprah she could just buy the store.

Or racism, for that matter.

[quote name='kyleboller']that's called shopping, it's what women and nancy's do. most people who want something will get it as quick as possible, whether that means going to a store or ordering from somehwere.[/QUOTE]

Now get me a beer, dingbat!

[quote name='Demolition Man']ATTN: kyleboller

There's a feature on CAG called "multi quote." In fact the button to it looks like this:

multiquote_off.gif


Can you please use this said feature instead of making four separate posts? Thanks so much in advance.

Signed,

Everyone Else In This Thread[/QUOTE]

But then he wouldn't look as much like a ridiculous douchebag.
 
[quote name='kyleboller']No, I did no such thing--but you just did in that post[/quote]

Well, if I say
[quote name='DuelLadyS']My fiance is constantly asked where things are at stores, regardless of what he is wearing.[/quote]

and you say
[quote name='kyleboller'] if you look like a godawful nerd or a lousy shitbag then of course people are going to assume you work at the associated retail store.
[/QUOTE]

Can you blame me for my conclusion?

Moving on-

[quote name='kyleboller']most people who want something will get it as quick as possible, whether that means going to a store or ordering from somehwere.

They don't need to waste time dillying around the damn walmart or gamestop or bestbuy. If someone knows what they want then they should (and for the most part, do) get it as soon as they can.
[/quote]

OK- have you ever worked retail? If so, I need to know where people are actually just picking up what they want and leaving. I want to work there.
 
i work at a coffee house/sandwhich shop. we have a small breakfast menu that includes bicuits and gravy. this one guy named marty comes in virtually every day (and when he doesnt, he orders it delivery) and orders just a bowl of gravy with a spoon and extra salt, and a dr pepper. we charge him the price of large soup, and literally every single time we give him the total he says "seems like it's gone up in price since yesterday there." then when we tell him it hasnt he says "no? shame. a little expensive." then he procedes to eat his gravy. after he's done, 9 times out of 10 he orders a donut to go.
 
Quote** i work at a coffee house/sandwhich shop. we have a small breakfast menu that includes bicuits and gravy. this one guy named marty comes in virtually every day (and when he doesnt, he orders it delivery) and orders just a bowl of gravy with a spoon and extra salt, and a dr pepper. we charge him the price of large soup, and literally every single time we give him the total he says "seems like it's gone up in price since yesterday there." then when we tell him it hasnt he says "no? shame. a little expensive." then he procedes to eat his gravy. after he's done, 9 times out of 10 he orders a donut to go. Quote**


Thats just plain cheap and nasty!!!!What a tool!
 
Just a mini-story..yesterday at work:

Fiance: "Hi ma'am, how are you today? Do you need help finding anything?"
Customer: "I HATE it when people do that! fuck off and let me shop!"

Ah, people... :roll:
 
[quote name='Drclaw411']i work at a coffee house/sandwhich shop. we have a small breakfast menu that includes bicuits and gravy. this one guy named marty comes in virtually every day (and when he doesnt, he orders it delivery) and orders just a bowl of gravy with a spoon and extra salt, and a dr pepper. we charge him the price of large soup, and literally every single time we give him the total he says "seems like it's gone up in price since yesterday there." then when we tell him it hasnt he says "no? shame. a little expensive." then he procedes to eat his gravy. after he's done, 9 times out of 10 he orders a donut to go.[/QUOTE]

I love sausage gravy as much as anybody, but god damn that is just nasty. I couldn't eat that stuff plain like that every day. Maybe once in a blue moon, but ugh.
 
I work the evenings at a small indie bookstore with a cafe.

Short little stories because I've not had too many long horror stories.

We live in the mountain area of North Carolina and the roads when it snows are dangerous because they are windy, uphill, and they tend to be narrow too... not only that but because it snows fairly rarely not too many are experience in snow. So it was about 6:00 (regularly close at 8) and nobody was in the store, it was snowing when we were giving the OK to start close up and get home before it gets worse.

Some jackass at about 6:30 (while we are almost finished with the routine) looking for a latte and is so shocked to hear we are closing "ITS NOT THAT BAD OUT! UNBELIEVABLE, RIDICULOUS!" as he stormed out the door.

We have so many people like that who come in at about 5 mins till closing (We tend to close the espresso machine earlier because there is a good 15 mins of cleaning and the machine autos shuts off at about 30 mins after and we need it cleaned before then) and are shocked to hear the espresso machine is closed. They always tell us they are going to Starbucks.. as if that's going to convince me to stop the process and make your fat ass another 500 calorie drink.

Then we have these people who come in, get a cup of coffee for 1.25 and use their laptops from around 8am to 8pm.. I honestly don't know how they do it but they are here 5/6 days a week doing it too. The worst part is these people do not like to leave.. so I'll normally go around to all the people sitting on laptops and such that we close in about 15 minutes. 10-15 mins rolls by and people are putting their stuff up and leaving except these regulars who see it as their right to passage to slow us down. Naturally because they are regulars they take things like this so personally, plus they know our managers and more importantly our owner. We've had cases where customers outright lied and called our manager minutes later.. told our owner the next day.

[quote name='DuelLadyS']Just a mini-story..yesterday at work:

Fiance: "Hi ma'am, how are you today? Do you need help finding anything?"
Customer: "I HATE it when people do that! fuck off and let me shop!"

Ah, people... :roll:[/QUOTE]

Lol, I've never had people say straight up shut the fuck up, but some just ignore me walking by. Even if I'm just saying hello and welcoming them. Then there are the ones who sort of have a tone about it "No we're fine!!!" I always love when they do come crawling back and ask me if we have a book in stock though.

I also work Sunday mornings where we get a shit load of crabby old people who buy newspapers (That I have to put together, about 150 of them at 7am on Sunday... btw) some are so bitchy that if I don't have their paper ready in my hand when I see them waking in they throw their money on the counter and leave. Sometimes these crabby people checkout with the cafe side and get a coffee and when I say "Good morning" they stop.. slowly turn their heads and seem pissed off they had to acknowledge me.
 
Same coffee house: Today at work (and I kid you not, this is 100% true) Dude comes in with a briefcase full of watches and bracelets and some dvd movies and tries selling them to our customers, all of whom are rather annoyed that he is there. So when our manager asks him to leave, he tries selling his stolen and/or fake merchandise to her! When she decilnes and asks him to leave again, he first orders a strawberry smoothy, then finally leaves, albiet not before attempting to take a dollar out of the big jar labeled "tips" claiming to think it was a give a penny/take a penny.
 
[quote name='Boeing 747']We have so many people like that who come in at about 5 mins till closing (We tend to close the espresso machine earlier because there is a good 15 mins of cleaning and the machine autos shuts off at about 30 mins after and we need it cleaned before then) and are shocked to hear the espresso machine is closed. They always tell us they are going to Starbucks.. as if that's going to convince me to stop the process and make your fat ass another 500 calorie drink.

Then we have these people who come in, get a cup of coffee for 1.25 and use their laptops from around 8am to 8pm.. I honestly don't know how they do it but they are here 5/6 days a week doing it too. The worst part is these people do not like to leave.. so I'll normally go around to all the people sitting on laptops and such that we close in about 15 minutes. 10-15 mins rolls by and people are putting their stuff up and leaving except these regulars who see it as their right to passage to slow us down. Naturally because they are regulars they take things like this so personally, plus they know our managers and more importantly our owner. We've had cases where customers outright lied and called our manager minutes later.. told our owner the next day.[/QUOTE]


I've never worked at a coffee place though I've been to many of them. It seems there was a Starbucks I used to go to daily when my job was near it and every single time, it did not matter what hour I came in sunshine or moonlight, there was this one guys sitting outside (inside corner chair when it rains) that was always on a laptop (I saw him a few times with a book). After a few weeks of going to the Starbucks I knew a worker there pretty well and asked him about that man who I always see there and it turns out for over a span of a year, that guy goes to Starbucks 6/7 days a week and always spends about $10 a visit. I thought to myself this guy is crazy, how the hell do you spend about $60 a week at Starbucks. I went almost every other day and regretted spending money on a cup of coffee, when a gallon of milk is cheaper, and I hear about some crazy guy living at Starbucks ... Seriously its JUST coffee, not crack, how can some people be so committed.

If I ever worked at a coffee place and had regulars slowing me down I would just tell them to get the hell out, the store won't disappear tomorrow morning.
 
Really? Sitting for 12 hrs on the damn laptop with one cup of coffee? Yea with people looking for jobs and people having to cut expenses, why not use the wifi they offer for free to look for jobs, check email, view porn and so on? :)

That brings another question, can you guys actually see what people are looking at from your broadcasting centers?
 
[quote name='DuelLadyS']Just a mini-story..yesterday at work:

Fiance: "Hi ma'am, how are you today? Do you need help finding anything?"
Customer: "I HATE it when people do that! fuck off and let me shop!"

Ah, people... :roll:[/QUOTE]

It bothers me as well. If I need help I'll ask for it.
 
It bothers me too, but I wont be rude. Until like the 10th person asks, then I get a little snippy.
 
[quote name='Drclaw411']this one guy named marty comes in virtually every day (and when he doesnt, he orders it delivery) and orders just a bowl of gravy with a spoon and extra salt....[/QUOTE]
"Now, wait a second. You doctors have been telling us to drink eight glasses of gravy a day! "
 
"I heard you guys trade games"

"yes we do"

"ok I'd like to trade this (madden 07 ps2) for this (xbox 360 madden 10)"


:roll:
 
^ lol

on a lighter side I had a customer send me a pizza all the way from Chicago because I made his stay at my place really special. :cool: honestly I don't remember doing anything extraordinary; he's an elderly man and came by to chat early in the morning. I gave him directions to places and customized a tour through one of my buddies who owns a limo company.
 
I overheard some employees at a store the other day. Some lady was trying to return an item used without the box it came in simply because she didn't want it anymore. I had just returned something, so if it was the same lady I saw she was older and in a very pissy mood, very condescending to the return clerks.
 
I didn't realize that "take a penny,leave a penny(or dollar) jars" were also called "tip" jars(must be an Acronym I don't understand) I cant wait to go to all the local establishments with this new information and use it to my advantage.Thank you Drclaw411.
 
I love the stories guys, please keep them coming! Sometimes when I'm in a bad mood I'll read this thread and the Craigslist stupidity thread and they cheer me up.Btw, I used to do customer service and I feel for all you guys still doing it cause it can really suck.
 
For anyone that works in sort of a casual environment (like I do in a book store/cafe) do not volunteer (or more importantly let others!) volunteer you to help with computers or "eye tuuches!" (I'm in the South). To put it quickly.. someone volunteered me to help this ~40 year old lady connecting her Touch to the Wi-Fi turned into downloading from the app store.. to searching for a specific audio bible.. forgot her iTunes password.. left bitchy about it.

So next day, she comes back.. while I'm eating my dinner (because it's a smaller store and there is only one person who knows how to run the cafe I have to eat close) asking me a bunch of other damn questions.. finally I just kind of acted dumb till her battery died on it and she left again.. she actually ran to Best Buy down the street to buy a charger (luckily for her car so she'd stay there outside!)

Seriously. At least put a dollar or two in the tip jar.. If you can afford something you have absolutely no clue how to use or what you'll use it for.. you can probably spare a buck.
 
[quote name='TiKi2']It bothers me as well. If I need help I'll ask for it.[/QUOTE]

Maybe so, but rather than taking it out on the clerk, disgruntled customers should consider complaining to the corporate office, or eschew B&M stores altogether.

Unless the store is commission-based (like The Buckle, for example), most stores who deploy aggressive customer service (unprompted indirect questions, offering a hand basket or cart) tend to be stores that are managing towards a successful mystery shop and are trying to fulfill specific criteria on the shop so that they won't get bitched out (or fired) by the GM/DM.

Even though I manage a store that pushes a system like that, I won't shop in others that do because I honestly find it quite anti-social. That might be a cultural difference though; I'm from the UK originally and now live in Texas, and I was surprised at how pushy US retail is compared to back home. Then again, sales culture itself is way more aggressive over here.
 
[quote name='Porksta']Asking people if they need help is also used as a theft deterrent.[/QUOTE]

Darn straight. If there's a guy who's being really creepy and hanging around the vulnerable video games and my LP is following someone else; I am very helpful to that person. "would you like any help finding a good video game?" "What sort of game are you looking for, I may be able to recommend something similar?" "Have you played this game, I'm sure that if you have children they'd enjoy it immensely" basically just annoying the hell out of them and in their space so they have no way of stealing anything.
 
[quote name='sonderiaom']Darn straight. If there's a guy who's being really creepy and hanging around the vulnerable video games and my LP is following someone else; I am very helpful to that person. "would you like any help finding a good video game?" "What sort of game are you looking for, I may be able to recommend something similar?" "Have you played this game, I'm sure that if you have children they'd enjoy it immensely" basically just annoying the hell out of them and in their space so they have no way of stealing anything.[/QUOTE]

Well played, that man. "I saw you pick up that Dave Matthews CD earlier and I thought I had better go over to you and ask you if you were a Dave Matthews fan. Oh man, I love Dave Matthews. Now I know you like Dave Matthews too, I will absolutely keep an eye out for you every time you're in here so we can talk about Dave Matthews" or whatever band has worked for me in the past too.
 
[quote name='Allnatural']"Now, wait a second. You doctors have been telling us to drink eight glasses of gravy a day! "[/QUOTE]

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=W2NzKHuvmYg

[quote name='flagg1216']"I heard you guys trade games"

"yes we do"

"ok I'd like to trade this (madden 07 ps2) for this (xbox 360 madden 10)"[/QUOTE]

Every time I hear something like that, I'm reminded of something Roseanne once said: "Yeah, and I'm still waiting for chocolate air."

[quote name='Boeing 747']For anyone that works in sort of a casual environment (like I do in a book store/cafe) do not volunteer (or more importantly let others!) volunteer you to help with computers or "eye tuuches!" (I'm in the South). [/QUOTE]

Quite frankly, I'm put off when anyone says "iTouch" to begin with. There is no such thing, it's called an "iPod touch." I'd be a terrible salesman.
 
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[quote name='Allnatural']"Now, wait a second. You doctors have been telling us to drink eight glasses of gravy a day! "[/QUOTE]

you better bacon up that sausage boy:D

Just a random thought here..

So we have to have a parent's approval when a kid wants an M rated game. They often ask why it is M rated. Typical response from me would be drug use, offensive language, blood and violence, gore, etc. Quite often after that they respond with "there is no sex or naked people right?". One one hand, I can understand them not wanting their kid to see boobies in a game but....

killing people=illegal
robbing old ladies=illegal
carjacking=illegal
fistfighting=illegal
drugs=illegal
sex=PERFECTLY LEGAL

The one damn thing that IS legal is what they object to. So little tommy can have all the drugs, guns, violence, blood, and cursing he wantst, but god forbid he see a pair of tits.
 
To be fair to the parents, the tits are the only one that is going to cause their child to want sex earlier and give them another mouth to feed. The other ones are just going to put the kid in jail and end up saving the parent money in the long run (if they don't fight the charges and try him as an adult).
 
So... people can't make mistakes apparently...

*Customer walks in the door looking all pissed off*
Guy: Why did I receive a call this morning saying my movies were not returned?
Me: Do you have your card with you so I can look up your account?
*looks up account*
It seems like you haven't returned Sherlocke Holmes yet, sir.
Guy: That's impossible. I know I returned it.
Me: Ok, give me 10 minutes or so. I'll go out on the floor and look to see if we have it.
*I spend the next 10 minutes out on the floor looking for his copy number. I don't find it. I'm not surprised seeing as how we had inventory LAST NIGHT, which means all of our movies were scanned*
I couldn't seem to find your movie, sir. We just had inventory last night, too, which means all of our movies were scanned in. There's no way the movie is in the store.
Guy: That's impossible. I know I returned it.
Me: Could you do me a favor and just check out your car or house one more time? I've had customers forget their movies in the car osmetimes and then claim it was returned.
Guy: I said it once and I won't say it again. That's impossible. I KNOW I returned it.
Me: Well, I don't know what to tell you here sir. All the signs point to the not returned scenario. If you want, you can talk to my store manager tomorrow.
*guy walks out pissed because it's OUR fault we couldn't find his movie that he probably still has at HOME*

I really can't stand the whole, I know I returned it excuse. I had a group of 3 ladies claim that they returned movies to our store, when in fact they had not. I argued with them for 10 minutes and repeatedly told them the movies were not returned. 2 days later they show up with the movies while I was working and tell me to credit their account because they thought they had returned the movies. It doesn't work that way people...
 
[quote name='olde_english']Maybe so, but rather than taking it out on the clerk, disgruntled customers should consider complaining to the corporate office, or eschew B&M stores altogether.

Unless the store is commission-based (like The Buckle, for example), most stores who deploy aggressive customer service (unprompted indirect questions, offering a hand basket or cart) tend to be stores that are managing towards a successful mystery shop and are trying to fulfill specific criteria on the shop so that they won't get bitched out (or fired) by the GM/DM.

Even though I manage a store that pushes a system like that, I won't shop in others that do because I honestly find it quite anti-social. That might be a cultural difference though; I'm from the UK originally and now live in Texas, and I was surprised at how pushy US retail is compared to back home. Then again, sales culture itself is way more aggressive over here.[/QUOTE]

Yes taking out on the clerk is being a bit of a prick. I simply say "no thank you". But yeh you are totally right , US retailers are pushy. When I worked retail the managers would push us to ask every customer if they needed help. I never did that. What I did was ask the customers that looked like they having a bit of trouble finding something or staring at a box for an extended period of time if they needed some help.
 
[quote name='flagg1216']
The one damn thing that IS legal is what they object to. So little tommy can have all the drugs, guns, violence, blood, and cursing he wantst, but god forbid he see a pair of tits.[/QUOTE]

You must not be a parent. The little gremlins we call children are EVIL, and they only grow up to be stupid, so we need to do everything we can to deter them from reproducing. The longer we keep them away from sex, the better!
 
[quote name='Methadon']we need to do everything we can to deter them from reproducing. [/QUOTE]
One of the most truthful things I have ever read. Awesome.
 
[quote name='Methadon']You must not be a parent. The little gremlins we call children are EVIL, and they only grow up to be stupid, so we need to do everything we can to deter them from reproducing. The longer we keep them away from sex, the better![/QUOTE]

How exactly does seeing boobs make them reproduce?
 
[quote name='DarkRider23']So... people can't make mistakes apparently...

*Customer walks in the door looking all pissed off*
Guy: Why did I receive a call this morning saying my movies were not returned?
Me: Do you have your card with you so I can look up your account?
*looks up account*
It seems like you haven't returned Sherlocke Holmes yet, sir.
Guy: That's impossible. I know I returned it.
Me: Ok, give me 10 minutes or so. I'll go out on the floor and look to see if we have it.
*I spend the next 10 minutes out on the floor looking for his copy number. I don't find it. I'm not surprised seeing as how we had inventory LAST NIGHT, which means all of our movies were scanned*
I couldn't seem to find your movie, sir. We just had inventory last night, too, which means all of our movies were scanned in. There's no way the movie is in the store.
Guy: That's impossible. I know I returned it.
Me: Could you do me a favor and just check out your car or house one more time? I've had customers forget their movies in the car osmetimes and then claim it was returned.
Guy: I said it once and I won't say it again. That's impossible. I KNOW I returned it.
Me: Well, I don't know what to tell you here sir. All the signs point to the not returned scenario. If you want, you can talk to my store manager tomorrow.
*guy walks out pissed because it's OUR fault we couldn't find his movie that he probably still has at HOME*

I really can't stand the whole, I know I returned it excuse. I had a group of 3 ladies claim that they returned movies to our store, when in fact they had not. I argued with them for 10 minutes and repeatedly told them the movies were not returned. 2 days later they show up with the movies while I was working and tell me to credit their account because they thought they had returned the movies. It doesn't work that way people...[/QUOTE]

No, but I can attest to being one of those people that did what that customer did...happened to me at a Blockbuster...Within a month, I was contact by the manager to say that the late fee would be taken off my account and was offered free rentals because through an "internal investigation", they found an employee would steal dvds being returned and the 4 dvds I was accused of not returning were part of the stash the police recovered from their house.

Not saying it happens all the time, but it does happen.
 
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