Q: Are you not completely shocked after finding out that Andre Agassi's amazing mohawk mullet after all these years was a wig? Forget that he was doing a year of meth with an assistant named "Slim." The fact that one of my all-time favorite sports hairstyles was synthetically made is the most unbelievable revelation from his or any book, right?
-- Ben B., Charlottesville, Va.
SG: I couldn't agree more. I was flabbergasted. If there were a Hall of Fame for memorable sports hairdos and facial hair decisions, my first-ballot inductions would be Agassi's mohawk mullet, Barry Melrose's mullet, Barry Sanders' helmet Afro, Rollie Fingers' mustache, Dr. J's ABA Afro, Baron Davis' beard, Al Hrabosky's Fu Manchu, Ray Bourque's playoff beard, Jack Sikma's blonde permafro, Shawn Michaels' extended uber-mullet, everything that was happening with Larry Bird's face and hair in 1986, and two other slam dunks I know I forgot (and I know you'll remind me). So to find out that one of those Hall of Famers was fake ... I mean ... where do we go from here?
The bigger question: Why did Andre write this book? Has any other superstar ever willingly disgraced his own legacy like this? It's the single strangest career move I can remember. I don't need the money, my place in history is secure, everyone likes me ... what if I rake myself through the coals and make it so the first two things everyone remembers about me are crystal meth and a hair weave? Why go there? Was I supposed to be inspired by this story? What reaction were you looking for, Andre? You asshat.