The terrible 1up worst launch games article

Wolfpup

CAGiversary!
http://www.1up.com/do/feature?cId=3167419

I was going to post this, but then realized that I disagree with nearly every game they list. Some of the ones I don’t comment on I haven’t actually played-so for all I know they’re fine too.

What’s especially bad about this list is they’re ignoring the genuinely terrible launch games a lot of systems have had. Some that aren't even playable, or crash, or whatever. There’s been utter junk-but this list mostly just shows perfectly competent, and a few even really good games.

-Donkey Kong Jr. Math-it’s obviously an edutainment title, and as such it’s not bad at all. Particularly for when it launched, I have no idea how you can think it’s that bad. It’s like attacking Brain Age for not being a game. Yeah, Brain Age is a terrible game, but for an edutainment software-thingee it's good.

-Super Mario Land-definitely a solid game. I appreciate that Nintendo didn’t just port Super Mario Bros., and the shooter levels where a neat change of pace. This is one of the stronger Gameboy launch titles, not its worst. For the time it was fantastic, particularly when you realize what a huge step forward the Gameboy was.

-Gradius 3-it’s Gradius 3, it’s got some slow down. That makes it a bad game? They even admit the slow down helped make the game more playable! I think this was one of the weaker SNES launch/early games, but only by comparison to the many phenomenal games the SNES had at launch.

-Super Mario Advance-yes the voices are annoying, yes it’s just a port of Super Mario Bros. 2. For the hardcore who’ve been gamers for years it was pointless, but bad?

-Wave Race: Blue Storm-I don’t think this was even a launch title, was it? I agree it was no where near as fun as the original-not even close-nor was it graphically impressive (again unlike the original)-but actually bad? Disappointing, but bad is pushing it I think. (EDIT: I guess this was a launch game.)

-Altered Beast-They don’t even list an actual complaint with this, just that it’s embarrassing if you spend more than 5 minutes with it or whatever. Sure it’s pretty shallow (not something they actually list as a complaint)-it’s an arcade port, that’s to be expected. It had phenomenal graphics for the time, and a very fun upgrade system. It’s still not half bad (I played it on Gametap recently).

-Clockwork Knight-thier complaint seems to be that they don’t like the character and it’s (basically) 2D gameplay. What they leave out is that it’s a perfectly good game. Again, not remotely a bad launch title.

-Street Fighter: The Movie-The movie was pretty bad. This game’s digitized graphics aren’t as appealing as the regular game’s graphics. And the control isn’t as spot on. But despite all that, I wouldn’t call this bad at all. In fact it’s got to be one of the more successful licensed games I’ve played. Sticking the movie actors into basically the same game engine is actually a minor stroke of brilliance, as these licensed games go. It certainly provided an afternoon of enjoyment, and if I had bought it, I’d keep it around just as a novelty (I certainly own enough OTHER versions of Street Fighter).

Next we’re on to Playstation 2 games-I didn’t like SSX, which they claim was the best launch title. I know I played one of those RPGs, and while it wasn’t great, it wasn’t terrible either. Actually a pretty rare RPG style for a console, at least at the time. (Honestly I can barely remember the Playstation 2’s launch-stayed up until 3am to get mine, but most of the launch games were really weak. The Gamecube’s launch was probably the best of the recent consoles-at least for my tastes).

Ape Escape Academy-THIS WASN’T A LAUNCH GAME!

Kameo-I didn’t like this game (much to my surprise as I love Starfox Adventures and the N64 3D platformers) but I’m not going to call it bad or disparage the many who do like this.

EDIT: Reading the list of launch titles on Wikipedia, I have to say I'm surprised that they're actually not as bad as I would have expected. It seem to only include literal launch day games though, and would probably be easier to pick out terrible games if we counted the first few months-particularly since so many "launch" titles actually slowly drift out in the weeks and months before and after the system hits.
 
I never understood how the gaming media turned their back on Altered Beast. I am guessing that these people never actually played it back then, and just downloaded a rom now and played it.

Sure it didnt age well at all, but back when the Genesis came out the game was great fun. It wasnt as technique orientated as Mario or something but it was a good straight forward beat up the bad guys, turn into an animal, beat them up easier.

I dunno between this site, EGMs feud with everyone it seems, Ive lost a lot of respect for this group. If Ziff David stuff wasnt all free I wouldnt even bother to read. Oh how the mighty have fallen.
 
-Street Fighter: The Movie-The movie was pretty bad. This game’s digitized graphics aren’t as appealing as the regular game’s graphics. And the control isn’t as spot on. But despite all that, I wouldn’t call this bad at all. In fact it’s got to be one of the more successful licensed games I’ve played. Sticking the movie actors into basically the same game engine is actually a minor stroke of brilliance, as these licensed games go. It certainly provided an afternoon of enjoyment, and if I had bought it, I’d keep it around just as a novelty (I certainly own enough OTHER versions of Street Fighter).

Whoa, where's your credibility?

Out the fucking window.
 
Should've been renamed to "worst first-gen games".... even then I don't agree with Altered Beast or Wave Race (which did not come out the same day as launch of N64).

But, like everyone else, I take everything they say with a freakin' huge grain of salt (I don't visit the site at all, only follow links that interest me from here).
 
I read that article fully expecting see garbage like fantavision
I'm not sure what the author's axe with gradius 3, clockwork knight or wave race are

There have been other spectacularly bad launches, nuon games and dvds were a joke
 
I'm really surprised they picked Kameo as one of the worst launch games, and there justification was pretty weak. There only criticisms were the overly bright colors and a vague mention that it felt unfinished, before going into nostalgia for Rare's past. Kameo had a ton of variety with all the different creatures, and it showed off the 360's power with some of the large scale battles. It was far better than Rare's other launch game Perfect Dark Zero, which had such awful level design that it used flashing blue arrows to point you where to go.

I also disagree with Wave Race and Feel the Magic. Wave Race may not have been as groundbreakingly great as the original, but it was far from a bad game. And Feel the Magic was a lot of fun, but a lot of gamers seem to have this pent up hatred for minigames.
 
Boy, that column was a reach. Missed the mark pretty much I'd say. Anyone would tell you most of these games were not considered "explosively awful" at the time (or now) by anyone's standards except apparently Bob Mackey's.

I have fond memories of gaming during these times and I clearly remember titles like Altered Beast, Super Mario Land, Gradius III, Cruis'n USA, etc. being great titles that kept me entertained for months.

Hell, the snob even considered Kameo a bad launch title because it was too colorful...TOO COLORFUL? He went so far as to flat out call it "ugly!" Hahahahaha! Kameo...ugly. Uh-huh.

When Rare isn't the only other pillar holding up a console's library, the ugly truth really shines through -- and you can't get much uglier than Kameo. Sure, the graphics are technically impressive, and the characters are far less Muppety than the Rare standard, but the use of every eye-searing color outside the Crayola box puts Kameo in a new league of retinal damage. What's even worse is that this traditionally warmed-over pile of Rare crud feels astoundingly incomplete -- which is a bit strange, considering the long development history of a title once designated for the GameCube.
His LiveJournal bio indicates he's only been paid $20 for all the writing he's done, and I can see why...guy's writing out of his ass. Garbage.
 
Get ready for more 'Best of/Worst of' lists on that site than ever. '2008 1up' is the new '2007 Gamespot', it would seem. Which is by no means an endorsement to go back to the latter.

EDIT: Kameo is very colorful, arguably too much so, and the graphics are technically great (especially for a launch title), but the overall art style feels super-gaudy and generic. The gameplay kinda sucks, too.
 
There have always been best of lists on every site.

People like lists and they get page hits.

No need to pigeonhole 1up into being the only site that does lists.
 
I just said that they're probably going to do more lists than ever, which is a sign that the site is in desperate times and could be on the verge of totally selling out.

For what it's worth, Jeff Green and the gang were just gnashing their teeth about the cheapness of using lists for easy hits a "GFW Radio" or two ago. So they must know what's on the horizon.
 
They COULD do lists more then ever if they wanted, but I could hardly care less.

Does it take away from the real articles on 1up?

No.
 
I understand the concept/theory behind lists, but in order to work they have to be somewhat grounded in a reality other people will relate to besides just the writer. Just looking at the responses in this thread indicates this is not the case. It might work on a personal blog, but not as a communication from a publication supposedly representing the industry. 1up has tons of great content, but it was a stupid move to pick up THIS list IMO.

For the record: Mackey has another list on 1up about the Most Useless Power-Ups that I found to be a much better read, chiefly because the arguments/opinions make more sense.
 
What the fuck at WaveRace BlueStorm? The game was awesome in the day, and the water mechanics are still fairly impressive even today.

Super Mario Land was a nice little platformer. I like my platformers as simple as possible and this fit the bill perfectly.

If a system did not have a really shitty launch title, then it shouldn't be included in the list. But there were far worse launch titles for some of the systems than the ones listed in the article. What a piece of shit article.
 
Agree with some, not with others. Launches are always full of crap. I've learned not to buy consoles until first price drops at the earliest after suffering through poor launches the past couple generations.

No point in paying a premium to play maybe 1 or 2 good games (that were also full price) vs. just wait a couple years, getting it for cheaper, having cheaper games available and being able to make a more informed decision on which console(s) to buy based on existing libraries vs. hype for the future.
 
HEY! I loved Clockwork Knight! And trashing a game just because it doesn't make the graphics processor burst into flames is stupid, even now.
 
Super Mario Land was great for a portable game at the time. Certainly not bad.

And the worst 360 launch game was Perfect Dark Zero.
 
[quote name='Chacrana']Whoa, where's your credibility?

Out the fucking window.[/quote]

Yeah pretty much. Street Fighter the Movie was fucking terrible.
 
[quote name='Chacrana']Whoa, where's your credibility?

Out the fucking window.[/QUOTE]

Care to elaborate on why you dislike the game rather than resorting to ad hominem attacks? I said what I think's wrong with it. Surely if you hate it that much you must be able to say what you disliked?

Not good, but I think it's an interesting curiosity, and far from a complete failure (or anything deserving of a worst of list).


[quote name='mrelusive']You'd figure Quake 4 or King Kong would have been the worst launch title on the 360...[/QUOTE]

Those were both good though...or at least Quake 4 is (I haven't played King Kong yet, but it got good reviews). I can't actually remember any bad 360 launch titles, but I may just be forgetting...pretty sure I am.

[quote name='msdmoney']I'm really surprised they picked Kameo as one of the worst launch games, and there justification was pretty weak. There only criticisms were the overly bright colors and a vague mention that it felt unfinished, before going into nostalgia for Rare's past. Kameo had a ton of variety with all the different creatures, and it showed off the 360's power with some of the large scale battles. It was far better than Rare's other launch game Perfect Dark Zero, which had such awful level design that it used flashing blue arrows to point you where to go.
[/QUOTE]

[quote name='Kyz']Boy, that column was a reach. Missed the mark pretty much I'd say. Anyone would tell you most of these games were not considered "explosively awful" at the time (or now) by anyone's standards except apparently Bob Mackey's.
...
Hell, the snob even considered Kameo a bad launch title because it was too colorful...TOO COLORFUL? He went so far as to flat out call it "ugly!" Hahahahaha! Kameo...ugly. Uh-huh.

His LiveJournal bio indicates he's only been paid $20 for all the writing he's done, and I can see why...guy's writing out of his ass. Garbage.[/QUOTE]

Seriously? $20? Yeah, this isn't worth anything.

A game being colorful is the dumbest criticism I've ever heard. That's a GOOD thing in my book. I really disliked the art style, but that's different.

Personally I liked Perfect Dark Zero a lot more than Kameo, but I think both were far from bad.

[quote name='jollydwarf']Get ready for more 'Best of/Worst of' lists on that site than ever. '2008 1up' is the new '2007 Gamespot', it would seem. Which is by no means an endorsement to go back to the latter.[/quote]

I loved Gamespot...until they fired Jeff Gerstman. Haven't been back since, and deleted all my bookmarks :bomb:

[quote name='Kyz']I understand the concept/theory behind lists, but in order to work they have to be somewhat grounded in a reality other people will relate to besides just the writer. Just looking at the responses in this thread indicates this is not the case. It might work on a personal blog, but not as a communication from a publication supposedly representing the industry. 1up has tons of great content, but it was a stupid move to pick up THIS list IMO.[/quote]

Yeah, I mean lists are fun, and even this one got us all talking. But I've NEVER seen a list so completely miss fire before. Usually 20-50% of the content on a list any given person won't agree with, but this is more like all of us disagree with 90% of it (if not always the same 90%).

Thanks for that power up link. I'll have to read through it. Right off the bat I can't agree with the Tanuki suit (which I still think is awesome, if super hard to get) and the cigarettes are interesting. Technically both are "worthless" from a gameplay standpoint, but certainly not from an enjoyment standpoint.
 
So I take it you didn't bother to read the article in question OP?

It's the worst launch games, this doesn't mean they're actually bad, just the worst of the launch titles. They even admit that Gradius 3 is a good game.

Oh and SSX was the ONLY reason to own a PS2 at launch outside Tekken & Madden (both were barely upgraded versions of PS1 titles). Sorry to hear you couldn't like it.

Honestly looking at that list I have nothing to argue with (outside the fact that PD0 ties with Kameo as worst of the 360 launch & Ape Escape Academy wasn't an actual launch title), and I challenge anyone to come up with a better list.
 
Super Mario Land? Really? Wow, this game pretty good for the very first handheld Mario game. Heck, even now it stands on its own merits. Especially since there have been very few original, non-port, handheld Mario games. I must have played through this game 10 times when I was a kid. I mean, come on, it's Mario in submarine and some sort of plane/rocket. Bonus points for having an awesome commercial.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IdIKyGYcqVc&feature=related
 
What a horrible article. I disagree on virtually all their picks, and genuinely like most of the games they name that I've played.
 
[quote name='elprincipe']What a horrible article. I disagree on virtually all their picks, and genuinely like most of the games they name that I've played.[/QUOTE]

#-o
 
[quote name='Wolfpup']Care to elaborate on why you dislike the game rather than resorting to ad hominem attacks? I said what I think's wrong with it. Surely if you hate it that much you must be able to say what you disliked?
[/QUOTE]

c'mon

[MEDIA]http://youtube.com/watch?v=dQAGllyCD1E[/MEDIA]
 
[quote name='-Never4ever-']So I take it you didn't bother to read the article in question OP?[/quote]

Yes, that's right :roll: :lol:

and I challenge anyone to come up with a better list.

I'm sure we all could if we had a comprehensive list of "launch window" games. The lists I've seen aren't very complete though, so there's not much to pull from. It would be fun to do a real list like that though.

We could make up fake lists like this one. "I hate Final Fantasy 2 because it comes in a red box! I mean a RED BOX! HA HA HA! And it's really Final Fantasy 4. What a terrible game".
 
[quote name='doctorfaustus']Super Mario Land? Really? Wow, this game pretty good for the very first handheld Mario game. Heck, even now it stands on its own merits. Especially since there have been very few original, non-port, handheld Mario games. I must have played through this game 10 times when I was a kid. I mean, come on, it's Mario in submarine and some sort of plane/rocket. Bonus points for having an awesome commercial.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IdIKyGYcqVc&feature=related[/QUOTE]

Thanks for posting that! I can't believe I still remember that commercial. How weird that it seems completely familiar after watching it. Geez, it's been almost TWENTY years!

I hate the way they portray people playing games in media-and that ad even did it. That annoying spastic kid who's madly whacking buttons on his Gameboy :D
 
The ones I do agree with are

Wave Race for GC - *horrible*.

The PS2 launch RPGs - Summoner and Evergrace are as bland as the article says and exactly as unmemorable.

They were right about those two.
 
Which Wave Race did they say sucked? The N64 game is one of the best titles for that system period. The gamecube game was good too. Its not better than the N64 game, but it's still a solid title.
 
[quote name='Nephlabobo']The PS2 launch RPGs - Summoner and Evergrace are as bland as the article says and exactly as unmemorable.[/QUOTE]

Yeah, the article stunk overall, but they were right about that batch. Yech.
 
Somebody talkin' 'bout mah ALTERED BEAST? Bitch, you want me to bust out some werebear on your ass? Do you?

Because once I find and kill three blue dogs, I will totally fucking maul you.
 
I'm most annoyed by the fact that the author seriously considers the piece of shit Ping Pals to be a stronger DS game then Feel the Magic (pretty much considered the best DS launch title across the board only matched by Mario 64 DS which was a relatively flawed port).
 
I didn't expect much from the list (seeing as how this is also part of the EGM network, which has also gone downhill imo), but wow... even I was blown away with how bad it was.

It almost seems like it was intended to bad on purpose, so people would talk about it and get other people to look at just how bad it was.
 
[quote name='doctorfaustus']Super Mario Land? Really? Wow, this game pretty good for the very first handheld Mario game. Heck, even now it stands on its own merits. Especially since there have been very few original, non-port, handheld Mario games. I must have played through this game 10 times when I was a kid. I mean, come on, it's Mario in submarine and some sort of plane/rocket. Bonus points for having an awesome commercial.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IdIKyGYcqVc&feature=related[/quote]Holy Crap, I totally remember that TV ad!
 
[quote name='Roufuss']It almost seems like it was intended to bad on purpose, so people would talk about it and get other people to look at just how bad it was.[/QUOTE]

It was. It completely ignored most of the really bad launch titles in favor of ones people would recognize. The truly bad launch titles generally are quickly forgotten even by diehards. There were just too many ridiculously bad choices to have been written completely seriously. Oh well.
 
Wolfpup, how could you enjoy such a mediocre title like Wave Race Blue Storm and then not enjoy an amazing launch game like SSX? Both are extreme sports racing titles, only difference is one is amazing and one is not. You got 'em mixed up there buddy.
 
Gradius, Clockwork Knight, and Kameo were all good games. Altered Beast is one my favorite Genesis games so I'm most of you on this one.
 
[quote name='mrelusive']You'd figure Quake 4 or King Kong would have been the worst launch title on the 360...[/quote] I hated king kong. My proudest gamerscore points are the ones I didn't get in King Kong. Kameo wasnt that bad. Quake was bad, King Kong, Gun wasnt that bad, but it was a last gen port. Kameo > Gun. Madden 06 and NBA live 06 are two of the worse games I have ever played. Kameo was better then any of the lunch games I mentioned. I think it was better then PDZ but thats debatable.
 
[quote name='Puffa469']Which Wave Race did they say sucked? The N64 game is one of the best titles for that system period. The gamecube game was good too. Its not better than the N64 game, but it's still a solid title.[/QUOTE]

They were talking about the Gamecube one. I don't think it belongs on any "worst of" list even if it didn't live up to its predecessor.

[quote name='furyk']I'm most annoyed by the fact that the author seriously considers the piece of shit Ping Pals to be a stronger DS game then Feel the Magic (pretty much considered the best DS launch title across the board only matched by Mario 64 DS which was a relatively flawed port).[/QUOTE]

Mario 64 DS's main flaw was the lack of an analog stick-which isn't the game's fault. Other than that it was solid, graphically enhanced in some ways, and I prefer the way it did the power ups and different characters. It reviewed higher than Feel the Magic. Personally, my favorite games from the launch were Mario 64 and The Urbz. Feel the Magic was neat at first, but quickly showed it was just a mini-game collection, and one that hardly had any mini-games in it.

[quote name='Rozz']Wolfpup, how could you enjoy such a mediocre title like Wave Race Blue Storm and then not enjoy an amazing launch game like SSX? Both are extreme sports racing titles, only difference is one is amazing and one is not. You got 'em mixed up there buddy.[/QUOTE]

Personally I thought they were both pretty mediocre. Didn't like either one all that much, although they were "okay".
 
The only things I can comment comment on are Feel The Magic and Wave Race Blue Storm, the latter only barely. Feel The Magic isn't terrible, but while I did have fun with it for a while, it soon enough became a pretty dull and, yes, frustrating game. I have to agree that it seems to be more of a tech demo than a game. If I'd paid full price for it I would have been pretty darn disappointed, but fortunately I paid a pittance for it and got my value out of it. If you can get it for $5 or less it's probably worth it.

Wave Race Blue Storm I can't say a lot about as I just got it recently, but my initial reaction is that it is indeed rather touchy to control. I wasn't having a lot of fun with it because of it. I'm going to have to check out the n64 version if it's true that the controls are more forgiving. I'm still going to give Blue Storm more of a try, though. Perhaps I'll get use to the controls....
 
It's been years since I've played either, but I had remembered 64 as having flawless, easy to use controls, and INCREDIBLE graphics for the time, and just being super fun (the one genre I think the N64 did well was racing). Blue Storm just wasn't that much fun somehow, didn't feel right, and didn't look very impressive. It seemed like it was no better looking than the first game, though that may be my memory playing tricks on me (although I do think Wave Race 64 used its hardware MUCH better-MUCH better developer).

I'd kind of like to play the original, just to see how it played versus these newer versions!
 
Wave Race on N64 was definitely better than the GC one. All the GC one did was improve the graphics and largely recycle the tracks and messed up the controls.

As for Feel the Magic, I didn't like it much. Was ok to play through once on normal difficulty, but after that there was no reason to touch it. But I generally dislike mini-game collections so it just wasn't for me.
 
Try Splashdown (PS2, Xbox) instead of Wave Race on GCN.

But really, I guess this list is just to cause controversy/get people talking. It's not like they chose many "terrible games", which many launches have had. I could just make a similar list and add great titles like Halo and Mario 64 just to rile people up.
 
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