Things you do to annoy your girlfriend

[quote name='Fortune_P_Dawg']No, all it means is that women like guys that aren't afraid to be guys. I'm no ladies man (by a long shot), but when I happen to get a girlfriend, I don't completely change how I am when I don't have one. If I want to walk around the house mostly naked I will, if I want to go camping I will, if I want to admire my boner in the mirror I will, if I want to go eat chicken nachos and drink beer I will, if I want to play 3D Dot Game Heroes or Bayonetta with our kids while she gazes at me like I'm a total nerd/tool/douche/lame-o/dweeb I will. I try to involve her in my guy-isms too. Sometimes it works, sometimes it doesn't. Whatever...

The only thing I don't do is fart around her and poop while she's in the shower; that's a precedent I don't want to set. The last thing want is a farting fiance' who poops in front of me. I try to make most of my annoyances as sexual or innuendo laced as possible.[/QUOTE]\


First off, to the guy that prompted this^^ reply: No, dumb broads like *assholes*. Worthwhile chicks want a guy who's worth their time. But we also need to know a guy isn't a wuss. Show a little manliness, but don't go full on asshole, it'll only get you a stupid chick.

However, to this ^^ guy, I fully agree. In fact, I'm quite entertained when a guy is willing to randomly show his guy side, and to be perfectly honest, I'm okay with him farting, especially in an awkward situation because I'll never let him live it down, but when a guy tries to go out of his way to bother a chick with it, that's just retarded.

Also, my bf buys shirts making fun of marriage to annoy me. (It secretly entertains me, because I know he's just doing it to annoy me.) He does the "we need to talk thing". He also purposely changes the words of a song to ridiculous stuff, and thinks it's funny when I glare at him for it. (To be fair, most of the time, it's hilarious, the problem is I'm a music lover, and you shouldn't play with music like that.)

And damnit, he reads this, so stop giving him ideas!
 
[quote name='emerald_215']He also purposely changes the words of a song to ridiculous stuff, and thinks it's funny when I glare at him for it. (To be fair, most of the time, it's hilarious, the problem is I'm a music lover, and you shouldn't play with music like that.)[/QUOTE]

This makes so much sense now....
 
People who fart at their girlfriend to annoy her....makes me wonder why I don't have a girl and I RARELY ever fart around people. I understand it's rude.
[quote name='AvidWriter']This always pisses me off. I never do shit like that to my gf and yet I don't have one. Yet you assholes have had them for years. It just solidifies my idea that women * like * asshole guys.[/QUOTE]
So true.
 
[quote name='J7.']Too much information.[/QUOTE]


You've never admired your boner in the mirror? Hell, I've looked at it so thoroughly I could almost give you a detailed description of it's "vein layout." Haha.
 
[quote name='Fortune_P_Dawg']You've never admired your boner in the mirror? Hell, I've looked at it so thoroughly I could almost give you a detailed description of it's "vein layout." Haha.[/QUOTE]

Translation: "I've spent way too many years trying to suck my own dick".
 
* Ignoring her when we are in a fight
* Playing Video Games When she is home from work

I dont do anything really annoying. Mos Def don't do a lot of what some CAG's said on Page 1.
 
[quote name='The Mana Knight']People who fart at their girlfriend to annoy her....makes me wonder why I don't have a girl and I RARELY ever fart around people. I understand it's rude.

So true.[/QUOTE]


I tried the whole super well mannered, designer clothes wearing, clean shaven, in perfect shape all the time thing for years. If you're wanting something with a cool chick whose looking for a guy, it doesn't work. Girls think you're girly. I'm not telling you to go ahead and rip-ass in public like it aint no thang, but if you're too well-mannered, too nice, and too well groomed, you'll repel whatever girl you might be after. You need to loosen up and be a guy, really it's that simple.

When you're too nice, too sensitive, or too well mannered it just make you seem as though you're after something... or gay (not that there's anything wrong with that).
 
[quote name='PR Mega X']Translation: "I've spent way too many years trying to suck my own dick".[/QUOTE]


And yet I still can't reach. :cry:
 
[quote name='Fortune_P_Dawg']I tried the whole super well mannered, designer clothes wearing, clean shaven, in perfect shape all the time thing for years. If you're wanting something with a cool chick whose looking for a guy, it doesn't work. Girls think you're girly. I'm not telling you to go ahead and rip-ass in public like it aint no thang, but if you're too well-mannered, too nice, and too well groomed, you'll repel whatever girl you might be after. You need to loosen up and be a guy, really it's that simple.

When you're too nice, too sensitive, or too well mannered it just make you seem as though you're after something... or gay (not that there's anything wrong with that).[/QUOTE]I completely believe it, I'm too well mannered and normally try to dress nice. I'm not gay, just that I tend to care more about others and just can't live life not giving a crap.
 
[quote name='Fortune_P_Dawg']I tried the whole super well mannered, designer clothes wearing, clean shaven, in perfect shape all the time thing for years. If you're wanting something with a cool chick whose looking for a guy, it doesn't work. Girls think you're girly. I'm not telling you to go ahead and rip-ass in public like it aint no thang, but if you're too well-mannered, too nice, and too well groomed, you'll repel whatever girl you might be after. You need to loosen up and be a guy, really it's that simple.

When you're too nice, too sensitive, or too well mannered it just make you seem as though you're after something... or gay (not that there's anything wrong with that).[/QUOTE]
I've tried the too nice, too sensitive and too well mannered thing. Then after a while I just said fuck it and started being me again.:D;) Although maybe I am still too emo for my own good at times.:cry:

As for the well groomed part, I go from two extremes, either short hair or I get the whole grunge look going on .

For the record, I never have and never will wear designer clothes, since there's much better things all that extra money could be spent on....like video games.:applause:
 
[quote name='Fortune_P_Dawg']You've never admired your boner in the mirror? Hell, I've looked at it so thoroughly I could almost give you a detailed description of it's "vein layout." Haha.[/QUOTE]

I don't tend to stare at it much or use a mirror, I spend more time giving it massages to keep it in working order. If I used a mirror it would almost be like looking at someone else. I prefer 1st person to 3rd person. Anyways, that post and this is a joke, except maybe the massages and this:

[quote name='The Mana Knight']I completely believe it, I'm too well mannered and normally try to dress nice. I'm not gay, just that I tend to care more about others and just can't live life not giving a crap.[/QUOTE]

Most girls want someone social. If you want one you'll have to force yourself to be that type of person. Unless you find The Mana Queen, then you're golden.
 
[quote name='Fortune_P_Dawg']I tried the whole super well mannered, designer clothes wearing, clean shaven, in perfect shape all the time thing for years. If you're wanting something with a cool chick whose looking for a guy, it doesn't work. Girls think you're girly. I'm not telling you to go ahead and rip-ass in public like it aint no thang, but if you're too well-mannered, too nice, and too well groomed, you'll repel whatever girl you might be after. You need to loosen up and be a guy, really it's that simple.

When you're too nice, too sensitive, or too well mannered it just make you seem as though you're after something... or gay (not that there's anything wrong with that).[/QUOTE]

This is crazy true. (Except the clean shaven thing. I do not tend to find facial hair attractive. [Though some guys can definitely work it]) But the designer clothes, perfect shape and all that do not work. Not always that we think you're girly, but a lot of times, guys like that tend to be overly self-centered, so when a chick sees a guy like that, we make an assumption. (Sorry, but it's true, I know it's not always the case, but it's how girls think.)
 
[quote name='IAmTheCheapestGamer']I've tried the too nice, too sensitive and too well mannered thing. Then after a while I just said fuck it and started being me again.:D;) Although maybe I am still too emo for my own good at times.:cry:[/QUOTE]


I can be kinda emotional myself, and I reserve this moments for when she's not around. Actually I did break, just one time, in front of her, and that's when there was a death in my family.
 
Things I do to annoy my wife:

-Completely Ignore her when the Chicago Bears are on. (Or any football game for that matter)

-Fart in the car. (Don't worry, she does it too. Despite what many people think, girls really do fart and poop too.)

-If my wife is around I'll always yell at her to change my daughter's diaper when she soils it, even if she has done it the last 10 times and I know it's my turn. In my mind if she's around it's always her turn. That really annoys her. (Also reinforces the idea that girls do fart and poop)

-I always make fun of whatever show she is watching no matter what it is. (Always like Horders, some medical show on TLC, Little People shows, and shows with people who don't know about birth control and have 8 or more kids.

-Whenever she is playing Peggle on my 360 I tell her to quit playing with my Peggles.

-I like to yell random quotes and such at her that she has no idea what I'm talking about. Example: She grabbed her purse off the table the other day to leave and I yelled at her "That's my purse! I don't know you!". She was completely flustered, I then laughed to myself and she left.

-When she wants to watch a movie I'll always pick something I want and know she doesn't give two shits about but she usually ends up liking it anyway. Whenever she picks a movie I don't even give it a chance and just sit on the computer while she watches it.

-I give her shit for taking a nap nearly everyday! Almost everyday when I get home from work at about 4p.m. she is laying on the couch taking a nap. I never nap and can't understand how she can take a 2+ hour nap nearly everyday. I always make sure and give her shit for that.

-I always spend our money on random crap we don't need. I always get all our bills paid but then I'll buy a new game or blu ray or something I want. I then eventually sell the games and movies or Ebay and then amass a good lump of internet money in my PayPal account which I waste on stuff I don't need. I defend it by saying it's my personal money from selling my own games and such so I should be able to waste it if I want even though it's our money together still. Recently I spent $400 on a Ruger .44 Magnum Super Redhawk. She wasn't very happy about that but I got a great deal on it and just didn't want to pass it up.


I do, however, do all types of gentlemanly things too which gives the relationship a good balance. I take her out on dates to dinner and a movie, she loves to go to the Casino and spend $20 or $40 so we do that once a month or so, I open doors for her, I drive, I take care of the yard. It's all about the balance. I think most of the people here who don't have girlfriends and can't understand why these guy do just assume that the annoying things guys are posting here are the only things they do but I'm sure they do much more than that for their girlfriends/wives. I'm sure I'm forgetting a lot of things I do that annoy her but apparently the balance of our relationship is there. We've been together for almost 8 years now and married for over 2 and going strong.
 
Man you people are way too uptight.

As for me,

- lick my girlfriend's nose at random times.
- silent deadly hotbox
- undo her brastrap when it's showing.
 
[quote name='mission42'] I think most of the people here who don't have girlfriends and can't understand why these guy do just assume that the annoying things guys are posting here are the only things they do but I'm sure they do much more than that for their girlfriends/wives. I'm sure I'm forgetting a lot of things I do that annoy her but apparently the balance of our relationship is there. We've been together for almost 8 years now and married for over 2 and going strong.[/QUOTE]

Pretty much. Yea I go out of my way to annoy my girlfriend sometimes (it's funny to watch her reaction), but I'm a nice guy otherwise and treat her well. Besides, you better damn believe she gets me back. The secret? We're best friends (I mean it) that love each other - yea it's pretty awesome.

Here's more to add to the list:

- When I refer to her friends, I give them nicknames to my own amusement
- Instead of a proper response, I'll tell her she's a [insert random pokemon here]
- Ask her for some of her food after I've eaten all of mine
- Pretend like I'm in mortal danger while she's driving
- Tell her I have secret crushes on disney jailbait like miley cyrus and selena gomez


[quote name='mission42']
-I like to yell random quotes and such at her that she has no idea what I'm talking about. Example: She grabbed her purse off the table the other day to leave and I yelled at her "That's my purse! I don't know you!". She was completely flustered, I then laughed to myself and she left.
[/QUOTE]

Hahahahaha. Classic. Sometimes when the girlfriend is talking too much I just interrupt her with a Dale Gribble Shi Shaw complete with gestures.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kfK8bGGNebk
 
[quote name='mission42']-When she wants to watch a movie I'll always pick something I want and know she doesn't give two shits about but she usually ends up liking it anyway. Whenever she picks a movie I don't even give it a chance and just sit on the computer while she watches it.[/QUOTE]

This isn't being annoying in a funny way or anything. This is just you being a complete douche bag to your girlfriend.
 
Playing video games is enough to annoy my wife (usually). I've been told that Left 4 Dead is gross and "not fun."

She actually likes the insulting pet name I came up with for her, "slut cheeks."
 
[quote name='DV8']Man you people are way too uptight.[/QUOTE]
not really there's just a line between being annoying because it's cute/amusing and then there's just being a dick. Now I know first hand that saying stuff online can sound meaner than you intend, along with the fact that some girls are way more tolerant than others, factoring in those and subtracting the ones that are obviously just jokes there's still a few items here that are just mean and if you really do that on a regular basis might qualify you for dickhead status.
 
[quote name='DV8']
- undo her brastrap when it's showing.[/QUOTE]

ah yes. i do this from time to time (never in public) but sometimes when shes doing the dishes or watching tv or something. just lean over and snap. yeah she hates that.
 
I do enough things unintentionally that annoy my wife, I don't need to annoy her on purpose.

Apparently I leave clothes wherever I've shed them and don't really clean up after myself in general.

When confronted with these behaviours I usually respond with something cheeky like 'why do you think I got married?'

OK, forget about what I said about not annoying my wife on purpose. ;)
 
LOL @ some of these replies, geez.

I'm not as crude. By far the worst i did was use a Winnie the Pooh voice (I do a spot on impersonation) and i used to use it in a seductive/sexy/gonarapeyou tone. It used to freak her the fuck out. :applause:

"Hmmm...let this honey bear get his nose in that honey jar. Cuse i will.....one way or another...." - etc, you can use your imagination.

GF is now Ex-GF :cry: (but not for those reasons lol)
 
[quote name='saunderscowie']Ha I read like everyones lists of what they do to my gf last night.. we found some of them so stupid we just laughed..[/QUOTE]

Being a whore is no laughing matter.

Unless she's a whore clown. Then it's pretty funny when they put a squeaker in their tits.
 
[quote name='anexanhume']being a whore is no laughing matter.

Unless she's a whore clown. Then it's pretty funny when they put a squeaker in their tits.[/quote]


lmao!!!
 
Things I do that annoy my wife:
- bite my nails (I'm trying to quit)
- bring my iPod everywhere
- not responding to her craziness during a fight
- not caring about being late for everything
- wake up at 5am to work out
- rearrange my entire schedule to watch football on Sundays

I'm sure there are a ton more but those are off the top of my head.
 
The only two things I do that really annoy Mrs. Number83 are:

- When she uses the downstairs powder room, I'll walk by and just fling the door wide open as I pass (her fault for not locking it); and

- for some reason I have becomre really good and unhooking her bra through her clothes with two fingers in less than 1 second (kind of like snapping your fingers fast) and I'll do that when we are out in public, so she has to go to the restroom to snap it back up. One time it really ticked her off that she removed her bra from under her shirt and out one sleeve and threw it at me.

/goodtimes
 
[quote name='IAmTheCheapestGamer']So after going to see a movie we stopped at a nearby arcade/hot dog joint called Top Dog. We all kinda go our own seperate ways in there and I go over and start playing Mortal Kombat(yes, the original:razz:).
[/QUOTE]

Old thread, I know... but...

Who knew the Witness Protection Program placed people in Northeastern PA. Or is that where you were relocated from?

If it was the Top Dog in Wilkes-Barre, extra points.
 
[quote name='zionoverfire']Remind her of how similar to her mother she is.[/QUOTE]haha that could yield some hilarious anger.
 
I guess the thing that annoys my gf the most is I'm a little too laid back at times. When she is freaking out about something I find trivial I'm just like "eh, it's not a big deal" or "it could be much worst". I just don't see the point in getting worked up about things you have no control over.

The other thing is I do tons of things around the house and then stop for awhile. I don't do it on purpose I just get too busy with other things.

I watch College and Pro football all day on the weekends which she hates.
 
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