JESUS! I am fed up with taking shits. In the past 24 hrs I've shit out about 92 pounds of waste and I don't feel good at all. I know eating a lot is usually the cause of this, but what the hell, I was so hungry last night after saying ''Im not THAT hungry'' to my lady friend about 1,000 times... but what the hell, Olive Garden is awesome.

I just know I wouldve killed myself if I ate the dinner portion instead of the lunch portion.

I'm an idiot, but being as cool and sly as I am, being an idiot sometimes is a perfect cover.
12:30AM - got naked and got into bed.
12:31AM - got back up and had my first anal blast.
1:09AM - woke up again and filled the toilet, again.
3:17AM -

this is annoying.
3:32AM - AGAIN?! WTF am I shitting out?
3:45AM - DAMNIT.
4:30AM - I scooped up some of my shit with a cup to see what my ass was excessively leaking.
4:45AM - vomiting starts cause I got too close to the cup.
5:30AM - finally fell asleep.
I know you who read this do not care what comes out of my ass. BUT.. this is a journal, and what you read, is what you WANT to read, otherwise you wouldn't be on my friendslist, now would you?
now I am here at work, and what the

! I am still warming up the toilet seat and using up all the toilet paper. :[
If I ever said my life sucked, I didn't mean it, because right now, this is when my life REALLY sucks. I almost had a terrible accident I would've never been able to go on with myself if it had happened.
I was climbing the bins of tile and vct to the top of the warehouse to get a box of base down, and I ran into a obstacle. I had to balance myself on a piece of wood, move 12-53lb boxes out of the way without falling and dying, and without shitting myself because I had already needed to. Half way into moving the boxes to the bin below, I got a weird sensation and had to clench my buttcheeks together. OH MY GOD, AM I REALLY GOING TO SPEW SHIT ALL OVER THE WORKERS BELOW ME?!

that! I jumped off the bin and landed 20 ft. below on my feet, scrambled to run to the restroom, and relieved myself of this. Wellllllll, when I jumped down, I moved the 2x4 I was standing on and about 3,000 lbs of rubber base came crashing down and made a lot of noise and commotion. Seeing as how I have to pick all of that shit up, it didn't bother me too much because I had saved myself the ultimate embarassment, not to mention all the shit-filled faces and angry illegal immigrants there would've been underneath me.
So what's in store for the weekend? SLEEP, SLEEP, and MORE SLEEP.