Should I date a girl that's bi? *UPDATE She isn't bi.*

[quote name='Collectordragon']Why wouldn't it matter?[/QUOTE]

Well if we need to get serious about it, would it matter if she dated guys? Probably not, so what's the difference truly?
 
Just try not to fall too fast and be wary. While I'm sure there are those out there that are bi legitimately, often times it seems either very attention-getting based, or they are... promiscuous. Or both. At least in my experience anyway.

I'm just saying watch out, I guess.
 
Well, there is a perception that most guys want to date "bi" girls so that they can watch or participate. The plain fact is, though most guys won't admit it, most guys don't want the girl that they are in love with to be doing anyone else. Most guys that do this do it with a girl that they really don't have strong feelings for.

First off, you aren't even sure she has dated girls in the past at this point, so to write her off on a suspicion would be bad. What you should do is just treat it like any other relationship. You may not hit it off at all anyway, and it may be a non-issue. If you do hit it off, then come about the topic when it appears.

So, on the whole, I wouldn't be concerned about it.
 
[quote name='lordxixor101']Well, there is a perception that most guys want to date "bi" girls so that they can watch or participate. The plain fact is, though most guys won't admit it, most guys don't want the girl that they are in love with to be doing anyone else. Most guys that do this do it with a girl that they really don't have strong feelings for.

First off, you aren't even sure she has dated girls in the past at this point, so to write her off on a suspicion would be bad. What you should do is just treat it like any other relationship. You may not hit it off at all anyway, and it may be a non-issue. If you do hit it off, then come about the topic when it appears.

So, on the whole, I wouldn't be concerned about it.[/QUOTE]

We've hit it off already. I'm not sure because she hasn't said anything about it but I checked out her Facebook profile and how she met various friends. For one girl it says they hooked up and another girl is says they were together so long they were practically married. Doesn't that strongly imply she had a romantic relationship with another girl? I should find out next time I speak to her. Maybe I'm jumping to false conclusions though.
 
[quote name='Mr Unoriginal']Well if we need to get serious about it, would it matter if she dated guys? Probably not, so what's the difference truly?[/QUOTE]

Truthfully that bothers me too but it's unrealistic for her not to have dated other guys and I know she has. As a guy who's still waiting to be with the right person it's difficult knowing that most of the girls I've gone out with probably haven't waited. Like Dunvane said, bi girls can be promiscuous which I'm the exact opposite of.
 
If it worries you that much, just ask her about it. Not to be an ass, but you're not gonna get anywhere asking us. In cases like this when someone asks for advice on a forum, they've aleady made up their minds about what they wanna do. They just want others' input in the situation.

Oh, and for most part, disregard most of the stuff like that you see girls saying to each other on places like facebook and myspace. A lot of girls like to do the whole fake lesbian thing to show how close they are as friends.
 
[quote name='Purple Flames']If it worries you that much, just ask her about it. Not to be an ass, but you're not gonna get anywhere asking us. In cases like this when someone asks for advice on a forum, they've aleady made up their minds about what they wanna do. They just want others' input in the situation.

Oh, and for most part, disregard most of the stuff like that you see girls saying to each other on places like facebook and myspace. A lot of girls like to do the whole fake lesbian thing to show how close they are as friends.[/QUOTE]

I did. I sent her an email about it. I really haven't decided anything other than to give her a chance and see how things go from there. I know I can be too judgmental and rigid at times so I like getting other perspectives.

I didn't know that. I'm new to the Facebook and MySpace scenes. She wanted me to make accounts so I did. I made some other friends happy too since they've been bugging me about making them.
 
[quote name='PenguinMaster']I fail to see the problem and I fail to see why your asking relationship advice at CAG.[/QUOTE]


Nobody seems to have a major problem with a girl being bi but I wonder how many girls would date bi guys? Seems like there's a double standard there.

I'm not really asking for advice just different perspectives and experiences on the issue.
 
[quote name='Collectordragon']Nobody seems to have a major problem with a girl being bi but I wonder how many girls would date bi guys? Seems like there's a double standard there.[/quote]

Of course there is a double standard - welcome to the planet Earth.

You will figure it out eventually but here's a valuable piece of advice: Every girl is three drinks away from making out with another chick at all times.
 
Yes. As long as she's not a slut (with dudes, anyways).

Just be prepared if she gives you advice during cunnilingus. Chicks know what chicks like, so she's probably been treated well in that department, and you may be weak by comparison.
 
As long as you both can have honest discussions about both of your past love lives I don't see the problem. As long as she hasn't recently come out of a serious relationship (regardless if it wass with a guy or girl), then I say procede as normal. Anyone coming out of a serious relationship needs time to sort through their feelings because that flame might still burn for their last significant other.

One of my best friends married a bi-girl and things started out fine, but she ended up leaving him for a girl. Honestly, it isn't any different if she left him for another man. Just try to get to know the person as best as you can. The older you get, the harder it is to date because almost everyone (that has had more than one serious relationship) has some kind of baggage they bring along. It's up to you whether it is a problem.
 
um well not to seem to surprised, but wouldn't a guy like this? it means your chances of getting her into a 3 some are much higher.... i mean just a thought, i know men have this annoying tendancy to think about sex ALOT
 
Is "bi" some new disease?

Cause if its just that shes "Bi" sexually, this thread is retarded. Being "bi" doesnt make you more likely to cheat, or even more likely to have sex more... its just a name.

Also, you can get into a threesome with any girl, bi or not... though she may be less likely to want it in her pooper.
 
[quote name='auralia']um well not to seem to surprised, but wouldn't a guy like this? it means your chances of getting her into a 3 some are much higher.... i mean just a thought, i know men have this annoying tendancy to think about sex ALOT[/quote]

To be fair, men thinking about sex all the time is hormonal and not much different than hormonal things women deal with.
 
[quote name='GuilewasNK']To be fair, men thinking about sex all the time is hormonal and not much different than hormonal things women deal with.[/quote]

Maybe I'm lame, but I think about my work more than sex... In fact, I'll go a while without thinking about it.

Maybe it helps that I work in the porn industry. (Just Kidding) :D
 
While bi-sexuality might not correlate directly with character for fidelity, there is no denying that she won't be presented with twice the amount of temptation and twice the amount of opportunities.

Just play this one close to the vest OP, don't fall too hard and approach this with a realistic view. Of course, Yes, try to get into a threesome is winning (I voted for it) because it's easy for us to say. If you really care about this chick and you think she may be the one, you need to have full and frank discourse with her about this and about each of your feelings about it. You said you're not the promiscuous type and to be sure, most of us really aren't, we may act like studs and act like we're down but it is the minority, not the majority who is willing to share their "one" with others. Just be careful.
 
I'd be wary of bisexual girls simply because the college friend of my wife who is very openly so (no, they never hooked up :whistle2:() jumped around from guy to girl and back again a few times a month. Sure it's a data set of 1, but until I meet a bisexual girl who is very monogomous, it's all I have to go on.

But realistically, there shouldn't be any additional concern on your part. Every girl has dated people before you.
 
i dated a bi girl once and she was great. she was faithful and she was all about a threesome (if we were both ok with the 3rd girl). overall though, i'd say it was just like any other relationship.

i've found that most bi-girls lean towards relationships with males so that might be something to keep in mind.

good luck.
 
Uh, you found out this "information" from FACEBOOK? Half the shit on there is fake/an inside joke. So many straight girls I know say they've "hooked up" with their friends on there.
 
Whoa, whoa...I don't think we've addressed the most important thing here. You're not sure if she's bi and you're basing your whole thing off of "Facebook" relationship things. You do realize alot of people put just random stuff up on there, and since "hooking up" is an option, ALOT of people put that on there. Heck I'm even some girl's father according to facebook. Also I've noticed in relationship status girls will be in "relationships" with other girls or even married just for a joke.

I do hope for your sake that you're not basing all of this completely off of facebook. Because this could end badly if you come up to her, all convinced she loves the nookie and in reality it was just one small joke on a social site.

edit: LOL, apparently I was having the same thoughts as Dead of Knight.

NOW, /end thread.
 
[quote name='specialk'] Because this could end badly if you come up to her, all convinced she loves the nookie and in reality it was just one small joke on a social [/QUOTE]

Surprise sex!
 
[quote name='Dead of Knight']Uh, you found out this "information" from FACEBOOK? Half the shit on there is fake/an inside joke. So many straight girls I know say they've "hooked up" with their friends on there.[/QUOTE]
:rofl: This is so true. I like when people take shit way too seriously, then it eats them up inside. Bi must be the new emo, damn you Tila Tequila.

If she really is bi though, all I have to say is threesome is not happening.
 
[quote name='SneakyPenguin']Go for it. I've been dating a bi-girl for almost two years with no problems at all.[/quote]

You don't get jealous of her other boyfriend?;)
 
Bi-girls are no different from regular straights to the raging femnazi lesbos when it comes to relationships. Be forward about your intentions and ask her about hers. It's better to be hurt now and move on to a more monogamous chick than it is to date a person for so many weeks only to have them turn around & cheat on you. Personally, I think you're still too inexperienced to truly understand what a monogamous relationship entails so you should date as many girls as you can until you understand otherwise. Simultaneously, if possible.
 
[quote name='Collectordragon']As a guy who's still waiting to be with the right person it's difficult knowing that most of the girls I've gone out with probably haven't waited. Like Dunvane said, bi girls can be promiscuous which I'm the exact opposite of.[/quote]

First, lol.

Second you're waaaaay overthinking this. I don't think you're going to have a problem because you seem really intense which is going to scare a free spirit like this one away. My advice is to loosen up.
 
[quote name='camoor']First, lol.

Second you're waaaaay overthinking this. I don't think you're going to have a problem because you seem really intense which is going to scare a free spirit like this one away. My advice is to loosen up.[/quote]

I concur.
 
[quote name='monkeydeew']if shes fat then 'bi' is code for 'low self esteem and stds'[/quote]

lol. i'm surprised you'd say something like looking at your avatar....
 
Yeah, I could stand to loosen up. I do over analyze things too much. That has served me well with strategy games and got me to the top spot in an online CCG I used to play but doesn't seem like it's an asset with relationships. I'm guessing I should just go with the flow?
 
I say no. But I say this assuming that she actualy is Bi. I haven't read the entire thread but others have pointed out before me that a) you don't know for sure b) you're getting your intel from facebook. and c) you don't know for sure.

You first priority should be the find out if you haven't already. Relationships are all about learning and all that jazz but you want to know something about her before you take a step like that. Of course by 'find out' I mean just ask. If we learned nothing from sitcoms it's that trying to find out information in any method other than just asking will lead to a half-hour of hilarity which sounds like fun but really just wastes 28 minutes.
 
[quote name='Collectordragon']Yeah, I could stand to loosen up. I do over analyze things too much. That has served me well with strategy games and got me to the top spot in an online CCG I used to play but doesn't seem like it's an asset with relationships. I'm guessing I should just go with the flow?[/quote]

Just don't mention this to the chick you're about to go after.

Also, please post a pic of this girl. It will allow us to give better advice.:D
 
[quote name='Collectordragon']Yeah, I could stand to loosen up. I do over analyze things too much. That has served me well with strategy games and got me to the top spot in an online CCG I used to play but doesn't seem like it's an asset with relationships. I'm guessing I should just go with the flow?[/quote]

I think you should loosen up about girls you haven't even dated yet. Do you really know whether she is/is not your type? If you just take her out for coffee and there's no spark, no big deal.

To be honest you're posing the question as if you already have a relationship with her. IMO that's too much baggage to be taking into a first date.
 
[quote name='Collectordragon']Yeah, I could stand to loosen up. I do over analyze things too much. That has served me well with strategy games and got me to the top spot in an online CCG I used to play but doesn't seem like it's an asset with relationships. I'm guessing I should just go with the flow?[/quote]
Analysis is good for long-term, soulmate-type relationships and bad for short-term, relatively care free flings. Just go into it with fun being your number one priority and you'll both probably enjoy it more.
 
[quote name='camoor']I think you should loosen up about girls you haven't even dated yet. Do you really know whether she is/is not your type? If you just take her out for coffee and there's no spark, no big deal.

To be honest you're posing the question as if you already have a relationship with her. IMO that's too much baggage to be taking into a first date.[/QUOTE]
Agreed. I've made similar mistakes before, assuming too much going into a relationship. I'd finally gotten into a relationship this guy I'd been lusting over for over a year, turns out he fucking sucks at relationships/was just plain incompatible with me and it was over after a month. You really need to date someone to recognize whether or not you're a good fit.
 
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