The Trick is to Keep OTT'ing

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[quote name='dcfox']I know a thing or two about lying to parents. Going on two months now I've been lying to my parents about my job, which is especially tough, considering I live with them. I made up my own company and did everything from calculating my weekly salary factoring income tax, faked stories about people from work, faked having health and dental insurance, basically everything short of printing business cards with the name of my fake company. The only thing is it's pretty much ballooned out of control. Everybody from aunts and uncles to my parents friends and coworkers think I have this fake job.[/QUOTE]

What the hell warrants doing that?

And furthermore, dude, you are so fucked. You can't keep that up forever.
 
[quote name='dcfox']Its all very complicated :lol:[/QUOTE]

Well, go ahead and tell the story if you feel like it. I'm not doing anything right now... :lol:
 
Ich hab keine lust.

I love that song. =D

In other news, I'm bored. Are they making any more Friday the 13th or Nightmare on elm Street movies? I hope not. Because the characters die and come backway too much.

But the alternate ending on Freddy vs. Jason is fucking awesome.
 
[quote name='Tiphireth']I can't wait to see it fall apart. :D[/QUOTE]

Coming soon...

The Rise, Fall, and Self-Destruction of dcfox... 10-disc Collector's Edition!

From the makers of The Rise, Fall, and Self-Destruction of CheapyD!
 
[quote name='Saucy Jack']Well, go ahead and tell the story if you feel like it. I'm not doing anything right now... :lol:[/QUOTE]

Well, it goes back 4 years ago. Entering college, I enrolled as a bio major. However as year after year of college passed I found that couldn't continue as a science major based on two things: 1.) I hate science and math 2.) because I hated science and math, I avoided taking any science courses. So come spring term my junior year, in a last ditch attempt to find a path, I chose a major based solely on the department I took the most courses in. This was how I became an East Asian Studies major. My parents weren't at all to thrilled about my sudden change in major and warned me that it might be difficult to find a career with an EAS major. So after I graduated college, their prediction came true. Over the summer I had trouble finding anything within my field. Because I have no real interest in my major, I decided against going to graduate school. As fall drew closer they became more critical of my lack of employment. So doing what any child would do to their parents I set out to prove them wrong. I created a fake job, figuring before they could find out I would be able to find a real job.
 
[quote name='dcfox']Well, it goes back 4 years ago. Entering college, I enrolled as a bio major. However as year after year of college passed I found that couldn't continue as a science major based on two things: 1.) I hate science and math 2.) because I hated science and math, I avoided taking any science courses. So come spring term my junior year, in a last ditch attempt to find a path, I chose a major based solely on the department I took the most courses in. This was how I became an East Asian Studies major. My parents weren't at all to thrilled about my sudden change in major and warned me that it might be difficult to find a career with an EAS major. So after I graduated college, their prediction came true. Over the summer I had trouble finding anything within my field. Because I have no real interest in my major, I decided against going to graduate school. As fall drew closer they became more critical of my lack of employment. So doing what any child would do to their parents I set out to prove them wrong. I created a fake job, figuring before they could find out I would be able to find a real job.[/QUOTE]

Wow... sorry to hear about your tough luck. However, you do need to eventually break free from the lie and choose a new path. Maybe you'll find a good job or become interested in something else, and you can make up for your mistake.
 
[quote name='dcfox']Well, it goes back 4 years ago. Entering college, I enrolled as a bio major. However as year after year of college passed I found that couldn't continue as a science major based on two things: 1.) I hate science and math 2.) because I hated science and math, I avoided taking any science courses. So come spring term my junior year, in a last ditch attempt to find a path, I chose a major based solely on the department I took the most courses in. This was how I became an East Asian Studies major. My parents weren't at all to thrilled about my sudden change in major and warned me that it might be difficult to find a career with an EAS major. So after I graduated college, their prediction came true. Over the summer I had trouble finding anything within my field. Because I have no real interest in my major, I decided against going to graduate school. As fall drew closer they became more critical of my lack of employment. So doing what any child would do to their parents I set out to prove them wrong. I created a fake job, figuring before they could find out I would be able to find a real job.[/QUOTE]

So they aren't curious that you bring home no money? Or they don't know?
 
[quote name='Saucy Jack']Wow... sorry to hear about your tough luck. However, you do need to eventually break free from the lie and choose a new path. Maybe you'll find a good job or become interested in something else, and you can make up for your mistake.[/QUOTE]
No reason to be sorry. I do have a job now. The only thing is I made my fake job out to be too good that I'm having a hard time trying to justify why I would switch from my fake job to my real job. Once I figure that out, I could put this little white lie to rest. As far as lies go, this one is pretty harmless IMHO :lol:
 
[quote name='sixersballernum3']Ich hab keine lust.

I love that song. =D

In other news, I'm bored. Are they making any more Friday the 13th or Nightmare on elm Street movies? I hope not. Because the characters die and come backway too much.

But the alternate ending on Freddy vs. Jason is fucking awesome.[/QUOTE]

Deine mutter hat lust.. Fuer meine liebewurst. :D
 
[quote name='sixersballernum3']So they aren't curious that you bring home no money? Or they don't know?[/QUOTE]
Well for the first month I was lying I didn't have a job, so that was kind of tough to pull off considering they even had me help pay for stuff around the house. But I managed to pull it off and like I said now I have a job. Its just a matter of finding a way to tell them about my new job that would plausibly fit into the story about my old job.
 
[quote name='Tiphireth']Deine mutter hat lust.. Fuer meine liebewurst. :D[/QUOTE]

I don't know too much German, but I can piece this one together. :bomb: :lol:
 
[quote name='dcfox']Well for the first month I was lying I didn't have a job, so that was kind of tough to pull off considering they even had me help pay for stuff around the house. But I managed to pull it off and like I said now I have a job. Its just a matter of finding a way to tell them about my new job that would plausibly fit into the story about my old job.[/QUOTE]

Tell them you got in a fight with a co-worker, settled the differences, but decided to leave. The job just wasn't working out; you're writing up the resignation letter right now. Simple.
 
[quote name='dcfox']Well for the first month I was lying I didn't have a job, so that was kind of tough to pull off considering they even had me help pay for stuff around the house. But I managed to pull it off and like I said now I have a job. Its just a matter of finding a way to tell them about my new job that would plausibly fit into the story about my old job.[/QUOTE]

So, how good WAS your made up job?

Becuase it sounds pretty good to me. :lol:
 
[quote name='sixersballernum3']So, how good WAS your made up job?

Becuase it sounds pretty good to me. :lol:[/QUOTE]
Well I make about the average starting salary of a college graduate at my real job but my fake job pays 5 grand more. Plus compared to other (real world) companies, the position I hold would probably require me to have at least a masters. Which my parents have questioned me on, but I have successfully sidestepped the issue. :lol:
 
[quote name='dcfox']Well I make about the average starting salary of a college graduate at my real job but my fake job pays 5 grand more. Plus compared to other (real world) companies, the position I hold would probably require me to have at least a masters. Which my parents have questioned me on, but I have successfully sidestepped the issue. :lol:[/QUOTE]

Tell them that you are happier with the new job, or that you didn't get along with your co-workers or something like Tip suggested.
 
[quote name='sixersballernum3']Is it just me or has this OTT gone along rather quickly?[/QUOTE]

+1, Rocko my boy. :lol:
 
Oh, yeah, a funny story that I forgot to tell you all.

When I went to Best Buy today, there were co-workers, a guy and a girl... chatting with each other. They seemed to be pretty good friends. The girl had a throat problem, it seemed, and her speech was just whispers and rasps. She asked the guy for a certain sheet of paper, and he said, "Here you go," mimicking her whispering tone.

She tells him, "fuck you!"
He tells her, "fuck you? What position?"

:rofl:

She playfully slapped him on the arm and they went on with their work.
 
[quote name='dcfox']Well I make about the average starting salary of a college graduate at my real job but my fake job pays 5 grand more. Plus compared to other (real world) companies, the position I hold would probably require me to have at least a masters. Which my parents have questioned me on, but I have successfully sidestepped the issue. :lol:[/QUOTE]

What exactly is this fake position in?
 
[quote name='SpottedNigel']I want my childs first word to be c**t. That would be great just to see how people respond, but also prepare him for the rest of his life...[/QUOTE]

Yes, online chat is certainly the way of the future, soon babies will be born with a mouse graphed into their right hand.
 
[quote name='SpottedNigel']I want my childs first word to be c**t. That would be great just to see how people respond, but also prepare him for the rest of his life...[/QUOTE]

I've thought about naming my kid 'Bitch'. Think of the oppertunities! 'Bitch, dammit, get your hand out of the cookie jar!' 'Bitch, pass the ketchup!' 'Bitch, you been looking at my porns again?!' 'No, Bitch, you can't drive the car.' 'You done knocked my Bitch up!' :lol:
 
[quote name='Tiphireth']I've thought about naming my kid 'Bitch'. Think of the oppertunities! 'Bitch, dammit, get your hand out of the cookie jar!' 'Bitch, pass the ketchup!' 'Bitch, you been looking at my porns again?!' 'No, Bitch, you can't drive the car.' 'You done knocked my Bitch up!' :lol:[/QUOTE]

"What can i have for breakfast daddy?"
"Nuttin Bitch"
 
[quote name='AngellicLulu']So I'm back from seeing Mirrormask and going to the Doctors.
Full details after I eat.[/QUOTE]

Cool. :)

Well, I think I'm going to go shower and maybe try out Burnout Revenge or Battlefield 2.
 
[quote name='SpottedNigel']"What can i have for breakfast daddy?"
"Nuttin Bitch"[/QUOTE]

:rofl:

'Daddy, can I buy these new jeans?'
'Whaddahell, Bitch, you think I'm made of money? Besides, no Bitch of mine is gonna walk around looking like a hooker. Bitch, don't make me ground you.'
 
[quote name='shrike4242']Tip gets bonus points for amusing child names. :D[/QUOTE]

Sweet. Hey, in a few years, I bet I could hook ya up with a fine Bitch. Bitch does chores, pay taxes, Bitch works hard. :lol:
 
Alright, so I go see the doctor, first thing she says is, "let's see who has it worse." She has the same exact infection as me so she prescribed the same stuff she was using.
It was expensive even with my health plan but my father paid for it.
Then I went and saw Mirrormask or as the theater had it posted in the theater and in the box office as Mrirrormask. :roll: And it was very awesome. There wasn't much action and the pacing was a little slow but it was beautifully done and I really loved the Sphixes and The Really Useful Book.
 
[quote name='AngellicLulu']Alright, so I go see the doctor, first thing she says is, "let's see who has it worse." She has the same exact infection as me so she prescribed the same stuff she was using.
It was expensive even with my health plan but my father paid for it.
Then I went and saw Mirrormask or as the theater had it posted in the theater and in the box office as Mrirrormask. :roll: And it was very awesome. There wasn't much action and the pacing was a little slow but it was beautifully done and I really loved the Sphixes and The Really Useful Book.[/QUOTE]

It was a relaxing movie...i liked that. I think i need the soundtrack...very Cirque-ish
 
[quote name='AngellicLulu']Alright, so I go see the doctor, first thing she says is, "let's see who has it worse." She has the same exact infection as me so she prescribed the same stuff she was using.
It was expensive even with my health plan but my father paid for it.
Then I went and saw Mirrormask or as the theater had it posted in the theater and in the box office as Mrirrormask. :roll: And it was very awesome. There wasn't much action and the pacing was a little slow but it was beautifully done and I really loved the Sphixes and The Really Useful Book.[/QUOTE]

Sounds like the movie was great. :)

What did they diagnose you with?
 
[quote name='SpottedNigel']It was a relaxing movie...i liked that. I think i need the soundtrack...very Cirque-ish[/QUOTE]
I have it... I found it on Bittorrent. isohunt has it.

And to answer Saucy, I had what I predicted an upper-respitory infection.
 
[quote name='AngellicLulu']I have it... I found it on Bittorrent. isohunt has it.

And to answer Saucy, I had what I predicted an upper-respitory infection.[/QUOTE]

OK. Glad to hear that you got that taken care of. You should be back to normal in no time. Take it easy, and get well soon. :)
 
[quote name='AngellicLulu']Alright, so I go see the doctor, first thing she says is, "let's see who has it worse." She has the same exact infection as me so she prescribed the same stuff she was using.
It was expensive even with my health plan but my father paid for it.
Then I went and saw Mirrormask or as the theater had it posted in the theater and in the box office as Mrirrormask. :roll: And it was very awesome. There wasn't much action and the pacing was a little slow but it was beautifully done and I really loved the Sphixes and The Really Useful Book.[/QUOTE]

Get well soon. :)
 
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