Orton - Now I don’t think there’s a man a live that can take this title from me. BUT, if someone did, nah, I wouldn’t be happy about it - but I could accept. What I couldn’t accept was losing it because of a crooked referee - ESPECIALLY if that crooked ref just happened to be John Cena. So I’d like to ask him to come to the ring, because if he’s gonna screw me over, he should at least be man enough to say it to my face.
Cena - You of all people. I will say something to your face - CUT ME SOME SLACK. I know you’re the champion - I’ve been there before. You’re smart enough to know that titles come and go - if he beats you, I am out of NEXUS FINALLY. But if you beat him, I’m fired. THAT’S MY SURVIVOR SERIES! And on top fo that, I gotta be the ref, so I’m supposed to call it down the middle, but if there’s a situation, If something happens,, I’m just telling ya… YOU SEE ALL THIS UNREST IN THE WWE UNIVERSE!? I’M NOT SURE WHAT I’M GONNA DO.
Orton - This is your bleeding heart way of telling me you are gonna screw me over at SurSer?
Cena - No…No…No…
Orton - If you do, sure, you keep your job - BUT YOU’LL BE THE BIGGEST PHONY IN THE WWE. And don’t even bother talking about hustle, loyalty, or respect. YOU OBEY BARRETT’S ORDERS AND YOU DISRESPECT EVERYONE WHO’S EVER BEEN CHAMPION, INCLUDING YOURSELF. GET OUT OF MY RING, YOU DO NOT DESERVE TO BE IN IT! I forgot - you can’t get out without asking your master for permission.
Cena - YOU THINK I LIKE THIS!? HE’S GOT ME UNDER CONTROL, YOU, THE WWE CHAMPIONSHIP. THEY RUN THE SHOW. I’VE FACED HIM - BARRETT MAY HAVE ENOUGH SKILL TO COMPETE FOR THE WWE CHAMPIONSHIP. IT’S HE WHO DOES NOT KNOW ABOUT RESPECT! (Nexus comes out)
Barrett - Oh Cena, thank you for those kind words. In fact, I’ gonna give you permission to say whatever you want, because ultimately, actions will speak louder than words. And we both know, when push comes to shove, you’ll do what I tell you. YOU WILL RAISE MY HAND AS THE NEW WWE CHAMPION!
Cena - In three weeks, IT’S OVER. I’m either out of Nexus or…
Barrett - YOU’RE FIRED!
Cena - Can I have a second with my boss? Yeah, in 3 weeks, it’s coming to a head, and when it’s all over, I’m gonna beat the hell outta you!
Orton - I don’t have to wait until SurSer. As far as I’m concerned, you’re nothing more than a scared child that needs to stand behind 7 other guys. I’m going to beat on you. AND BEAT ON YOU UNTIL YOUR UNCONSIOUS. AND THE ONLY THING YOUR STOOGE CAN DO IS COUNT TO TEN. UNLESS YOU WANT TO COME TO THE RING AND PROVE ME OTHERWISE!
Cole - EXCUSE ME. I HAVE RECEIVED AN E-MAIL FROM THE RAW GM! AND I QUOTE. Randy, as the WWE Champion, I feel for the position you’re in. You wanna know what Cena’s going to do, so I think we should find out tonight. Tonight, there will be a main event with Barrett and a partner of his choice against you Randy and a partner of your choosing. The special referee will be JOHN CENA.
King - One thing I’ve noticed about David Otunga is that he has talent.
(after a snap suplex)Cole - NECKBREAKER BY KIDD!
Truth - JC, YOU GOT BUCK TONIGHT!
Cena - What?
King - PEE WEE’S PLAYHOUSE MEETS RAW. IT’S GONNA BE GREAT!
Sheamus - I EXPECT Y’ALL THOUGHT I’D COME OUT HERE AND THROW A BIG TEMPER TANTRUM BECAUSE SANTINO BEAT ME. He didn’t beat me, I BEAT MYSELF. I gave you a week to bask in the glory of your fluke, but now I’m gonna make you pay, fella!
Santino - I would just like to say that I respect you as a human beings. In fact, I am a little big fan of yours. Last night, I went out trick or treating dressed as you. Only problem everyone thought I WAS A GHOST! In fact, that’s actually quite irritated - no wonder you’re so angry person. Speaking of irritating, I consumed a tremendous amount of candy. Bad things happen. You see? Unfortunately, I have some bad news. Doctor told me if I wrestle, I’m going to accidentally THROW UP IN YOUR FACE. And I don’t think anyone would like to see that. I did find you a suitable replacement! (Kozlov comes out)
Kozlov - Sheamus, you talk funny! Now, I crush you!
(to Cole)King - I went trick or treating as you and got no candy.
Crowd - CO-BRA!
Santino - I got thee dollars - I was gonna make it rain later, but okay…
Santino - American Express card…
Sheamus - YOU GOT BAD CREDIT, FELLA!
Santino - I’M REBUILDING MY CREDIT!
Santino - I’ll write you a check - how do you spell Sheamus?
Mark Henry - Pee Wee - YOU’RE AN ICON. AND YOU’RE SUPER-STRONG. Just the man to give me a big hug.
King - Ryder makes ya go woo woo woo!
Cole - It’s Zeke and Zack!
King - I love Pee Wee. I used to watch it religiously.
Cole - Doesn’t shock me at all.
Pee Wee - THANKS A LOT. I’M TOTALLY FEELING RAW! I want to explain tonight’s secret word, and remember, IT’S A SECRET. RING!
Cole - RING!
Pee Wee - You remember what to do when someone says the secret word, right?
Cole - YEAH.
Pee Wee - RING.
Cole - YEAH YEAH YEAH!
Cole - WELCOME TO MIZVILLE!
Cole - SO MUCH FOR THE PLAYHOUSE - YOU’RE IN MIZ’S HOUSE!
Miz - I thought Raw losing at BR was the lowest point in the show, but I was wrong. I don’t like you, Pee-Wee. Never did. I was more of a He-Man guy.
Pee Wee - IF YOU LOVE HIM SO MUCH, WHY DON’T YOU MARRY HIM?
Miz - Get out of my ring… (RING pops up)
Riley - Dude, you can’t say the secret word.
Riley - Mr. Herman, I’m a big fan.
Miz - STOP IT! Are you stupid? Do you understand that I’m Mr. MITB. A FUTURE WWE CHAMPION. I DON’T CARE IF YOU’RE ON BROADWAY, WERE IN MOVIES. DO YOU WANT ME TO BEAT YOU INTO A PULP!
Pee Wee - Miz, you’re starting to make me angry. I’m a loner - A REBEL.
Miz - really?
Pee-Wee - REALLY INFINITY!
Pee-Wee - We can play the infinity game all not, but I’m gonna give you some advice - Don’t anger the Pee! I got my cousin here!
Miz - He’s gonna protect. THAT’S SO FUNNY, I FORGOT TO LAUGH. BRING THE WHOLE HERMAN FAMILY - I WILL DESTROY THEM ALL!
Cole - AND I QUOTE! Miz, you’re not getting out of this so easy. You said you’d beat anyone in Pee Wee’s family, well, tonight’s secret word is PAIN. Because you’re gonna face his cousin, the Big Pee-Wee, next!
King - THE BIG PEE AND THE LITTLE PEE!
Cole - This is dumb.
King - You ever see yourself In that podium? That’s dumb.
Crowd - MIZ IS AWESOME! MIZ IS AWESOME!
King - If you love Miz so much, why don’t you marry him?
Cole - Okay, Pee Wee King.
(after a top rope double axe handle)Cole - KNUCKLES to Big Show’s HEAD!
Cole - MIZ SURVIVES!
Cole - Reading the e-mail from the GM putting Miz in this match was one of the hardest things I’ve ever had to do.
Barrett - When you get done doing the right thing, I want you to clean my locker room. Sweep, Mop, THEN CLEAN MY BACK!
Otunga - You won’t have to wash his back, because it won’t be his hand you’re raising. I’ve got more talent than anyone in Nexus.
Cole - All the divas were telling me that Daniel Bryan’s a peeping tom.
Cole - Daniel Bryan, the U.S. Champion, hasn’t had a date in 15 years.
King - How would you know!?
1 guy - DANIEL BRYAN!
Cole - Every time that Bryan beat Dolph, the ref screwed up.
1 Guy - LET’S GO BRYAN!
Cole - Hi Maryse. OKAY, I’LL TELL HIM.
King - What did she say?
Cole - That he’s a nerd.
King - She spoke French.
Cole - I’m taking lessons with Rosetta Stone.
Cole - I love the Daniel Bryan chants. DANIEL BRYAN. IS SO BORING.
King - I’m not sure about this Goldust-Aksana wedding - he’s a cradle-robber.
Cole - WHAT!?
1 Guy - LET’S GO BRYAN!
King - Anymore of those kicks and he’ll have a pirate’s dream - a sunken chest.
(after Alberto-Edge video)Cole - SINCE I’M THE VOICE OF WWE, I’LL BE ABLE TO CALL THAT MATCH ON FRIDAY.
Layla - You’re the best there is, was, and ever will be!
Cole - Taylor Swift just texted me - she wants to get her picture taken with LayCool.
(to Nattie)Layla - YOU’RE SPECIAL!
Layla - GET OFF MY FRIEND!
Dr. Prinze Jr. - Mr. McMahon, it’s a shame no one has come to see you but your wife. She’s a smart, great woman. And she’s spent 50 million dollars.
Vince - WHAT!? FIFTY MILLION DOLLARS!? As long as WWE is okay…
Dr. Prinze Jr. - Well… The Undertaker’s been buried.
Vince - And the Nexus…
Dr. Prinze Jr. - Is stronger than ever. And John Cena’s a member.
Vince - Next thing you’re gonna tell me is that Daniel Bryan is United States Champion!
Vince - If my wife can run for Senate, THEN I CAN RUN FOR PRESIDENT OF THE UNITED STATES!
Steph - Honey, I had just had the weirdest dream... My dad’s still in a coma, right?
HHH - Yeah, he’s brain dead.
Cole - It’s a big day on Thursday for the rap community - Lil Wayne’s getting out of prison. There’s gonna be a big party - me and R-Truth are going.
King - Shut up - I WANNA GET CRUNK. Or at least try.
Cole - Randy Orton is a 7-time WWE Champion.
Cole - R-Truth is one of Cena’ best friends in the entire WWE.
(before a move)Truth - WHAT’S UP!?
Barrett - THERE WAS A TAG. THE WHOLE WORLD SAW IT!
Cena - I didn’t.