Why do people find it strange that I wanna be single?

FunkyDoRight

FunkyDoRight

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I have to defend my stance more that enough on the fact that I want to stay single.

I'm 21 and have been single my whole life. I work all the time and I really don't want the hassle while I am trying to get my feet planted. I have watched my bro and friends get involved at younger ages and ended up living poor as hell and just bad off in general.

I guess I am wondering why it is so weird to people that I just don't care about dating?
 
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Is this you on the left?
 
[quote name='Xevious']
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Is this you on the left?[/quote]

Lol, no I would have no problem picking up chicks. I just don't want to fill what little time i have making someone else happy.
 
[quote name='FunkyDoRight']Lol, no I would have no problem picking up chicks. I just don't want to fill what little time i have making someone else happy.[/quote]

Oh I see...You want to be more like this guy:

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[quote name='Xevious']Oh I see...You want to be more like this guy:

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[/quote]

That looks like the cover to the best porno in the world.
 
[quote name='FunkyDoRight']That looks like the cover to the best porno in the world.[/QUOTE]

meh, its only a B-class movie until Grimace is involved. Through him and the harmburgler in hte mix and you have an A class porno.
 
[quote name='FunkyDoRight']I have watched my bro and friends get involved at younger ages and ended up living poor as hell and just bad off in general.[/QUOTE]

Uh what? Did they get involved with homeless, jobless bums?

If you move in with your gf it's actually a lot cheaper. Combined income ftw.

I live in a 2bd apartment with a roommate, back when I lived with my gf I only had to pay 1/4 the rent (half a bedroom). Life was good. Now I'm paying half, $475/mo. Utilities, cable, etc, all cheaper when split by an extra person.

I've been single for the past six months or so, mainly because I've wanted to focus on school. When I have a gf I'm much less productive with school work. I definitely miss the emotional fulfillment but my grades have improved so I think it's worth it.
 
[quote name='Koggit']Uh what? Did they get involved with homeless, jobless bums?

If you move in with your gf it's actually a lot cheaper. Combined income ftw.
.[/quote]

No my brother has been engaged after 3 weeks, then got dropped, then dated a girl for 2 years and broke it off with her after 6 months of telling me he was going to do it, but now he regrets it because he is depressed as hell and can't find a woman.

My best friend did some time because of one of his girlfriends... but he is stuipd 18 and 14 don't mix.

My other best friend is 20 and has a vasectomy now because his GF wanted him to get one....

My friend at work is going through a killer divorce, plus half the guys i work with have nothing now because of divorces.
 
It's weird because a lot of people do care about dating and will really do whatever they can for love. I think that's a bit silly, but hey, I've never been in love.
 
Well some people just don't really have much of an emotional need for companionship, so if that's the case then there's no reason why you shouldn't be single. If you actually would like a relationship and you just "don't want the hassle" I think maybe the problem is that the people you've known have had horrible relationships.

Like Koggit was saying, a gf/bf/husband/wife can really be a help financially and obviously emotionally, don't let your friends' bad relationships be the model for what all relationships are like. You just have to find somebody that you're really compatible with, something that the people you listed off obviously didn't do.
 
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[quote name='DrunkTigerWoods']Once you find the right person, you'll change your tune. Not all ladies are selfish, greedy, attention-seeking time burglars.[/quote]True. Not all. Just most.
 
I've been enjoying the single life. I have a hard enough time dealing with myself sometimes. I love living vicariously though my married friends and how they all get "in trouble" or are "whipped" and don't know it. lol
 
It certainly can be the case that at this moment in your life you are not in dire need of a romantic companion, but there is a point that everybody reaches when the occasion arises. Therefore I suggest not keeping your options closed. If you do not want to actively look then that is fine, but if the right one comes along then do not let her get away! In my experience, the special ones are few and far between. :cry:
 
[quote name='Quintessence']It certainly can be the case that at this moment in your life you are not in dire need of a romantic companion, but there is a point that everybody reaches when the occasion arises. Therefore I suggest not keeping your options closed. If you do not want to actively look then that is fine, but if the right one comes along then do not let her get away! In my experience, the special ones are few and far between. :cry:[/QUOTE]

This is true. Back in highschool someone I worked with was trying to set me up with her friend. Hell one night everyone I worked with was. At the time I didnt want to date and if she was not someone that I wanted to date anyway. Nothing was wrong with her I just never talked to her and was interested in someone else if I was to date someone. It was my last 2 or 3 weeks of highschool so I said what the hell I have all my shit that I needed to get done to graduate in and all I had to do was show up to class. All my teachers had told me all I needed to do was show up and I pass. All in one week I asked out the girl that I wanted to for a long time. I got shot down, got pissed off at work and quit. I never saw the girl I worked with or her friend after that. I would always see her friend on the way to one of my classes however the day I got shot down till now I never saw her again. I have regreted from that day leting her get away. I liked her just at the time I wanted to be with someone else if I was to date and the last time I talked to the one I asked out I saw how much of a bitch she now is.

Quintessence is right do not let her get away. I did and have regreted it. Every time I get shot down or things go bad I kick myself in the ass for leting her go. Trust me on this if you find someone that you like and would like to be with go for it. Dont let her go just because you want to be single for now.
 
[quote name='Nibi']I think you should do what makes YOU happy. Forget about what everyone else says.[/quote]

/Agree
 
I think most of those like that are projecting their belief that to be "complete," you need to be with someone. I'd say a good percentage of those are co-dependent at some level. I have friends like that and I really pity that they depend on others to make them happy. I dated plenty in college and afterwards and I was married. While the marriage failed, I realized how much more I like being single. I enjoy the freedom, the peace and the quiet. Sure, you can have some of that in a relationship but it's not the same whatsoever. I love being alone now and for the foreseeable future, I'll remain this way. I'll probably date again here and there at some point but it's nothing I care to pro-actively pursue.
 
I'm surprised there hasn't been any gay references yet? I get teased all the time about sex, but ya know... honestly, sex doesn't last. Hell, I keep hearing about how the married people joke about not wanting to do it a lot of times or one doesn't want to do it or yada yada so I dunno. : shrugs:

You said it though, freedom... PEACE AND QUIET.
 
It's probably just you haven't met someone that good yet. No reason to hurry. Some poeple just feel like they need to be in a relationship all the time to be happy. I enjoy my time to myself, personally. (Although I am pursuing a girl I 'm quite find of)
 
[quote name='VipFREAK']I'm surprised there hasn't been any gay references yet? I get teased all the time about sex, but ya know... honestly, sex doesn't last. Hell, I keep hearing about how the married people joke about not wanting to do it a lot of times or one doesn't want to do it or yada yada so I dunno. : shrugs:

You said it though, freedom... PEACE AND QUIET.[/quote]


First of all I did do a classically bad gay joke. :p

Secondly, you haven't had sex? You keep hearing bullshit, stop watching TV and listening to bullshit and fuck someone, male or female, it doesn't matter. "I keep hearing..." that's a lame excuse, you don't need to date to have sex. On TV the guy always wants sex, and it makes it seem that it's the woman that doesn't, that's bullshit too. I have never met a women who didn't like having sex with their boyfriend or just a "friend"... except the ones that hit on me... :lol:

So go out there and live your life and stop "hearing" shit, experience it. You don't want a girlfriend fine. Do you want sex? You don't need a girlfriend for sex. If you don't want sex, also fine, but what you "hear" is from a small group that doesn't mean it's the majority view.
 
Just like John Cena, He can get through anything with the help of the "5 knuckle Shuffle"

I really don't put much faith in finding the RIGHT ONE, but dont mean you can find a Friend with benefits
 
dude, some guys need girls, and they spend all their money and time to get ass. some guys dont. you dont, so who gives a $hit what other people think. (you might change in the future, who knows.)

as you get older, the more you learn that what other people think doesn't matter.

enjoy your life.
 
There's nothing wrong with that. I'm 25 and though I've dated in the past, it was mostly for sex (just being honest). Now that I've graduated college and I am working full-time I have started to settle down with the girl I want to start a family with.

I'm very much a loner but as I've grown older I've realized how fun it is to be in love and have someone love you. Most of my friends have children now and it's amazing to watch people you grow up with interact with their child and see unconditional love develop. Without gaying up the thread any further, I'll just say that it took me a while but I feel that having these relationships is one of the most selfless things you can do.

Don't get me wrong though, I feel that there are way too many people in this world reproducing and getting married for completely wrong reasons and it makes me want to go postal at times dealing with the public population. But hey, whatchya gonna do?

You're free to live your life as you choose, so don't make decisions based on anything but what you want. You're gonna hate hearing this so I'm going to tell you anyway that at 21 your world view will still be changing dramatically over the next few years. Enjoy your youth and do what makes you happy.
 
[quote name='QiG']
You're free to live your life as you choose, so don't make decisions based on anything but what you want. You're gonna hate hearing this so I'm going to tell you anyway that at 21 your world view will still be changing dramatically over the next few years. Enjoy your youth and do what makes you happy.[/quote]

indeed.. 21 and say 35 are worlds apart in perspective on relationships. don't hear too many single guys in their 30's or 40's saying they don't want a relationship.
 
[quote name='sendme']
Quintessence is right do not let her get away. I did and have regreted it. Every time I get shot down or things go bad I kick myself in the ass for leting her go. Trust me on this if you find someone that you like and would like to be with go for it. Dont let her go just because you want to be single for now.[/quote]

The worst part of the whole love process is living with the knowledge that you let the right one go. It is certainly evident that you feel horrible about this happening to you, sendme, and I hope that the OP at least takes our situation and learns from it.

Of course one can love again after heartbreak, but it is difficult. First of all, there are not that many girls whom I am personally compatible with, and I am sure that it is the same case for a lot of people. Second, after failed relationships a person can become cynical and/or melancholic and lose their ambition. This will be the time you need her most, but will also be the time you are least in the position to achieve love.
 
[quote name='tehweezner']indeed.. 21 and say 35 are worlds apart in perspective on relationships. don't hear too many single guys in their 30's or 40's saying they don't want a relationship.[/quote]

I am only 22 and have had the desire for quite some time to marry the right girl eventually, well to just be dating indefinitely actually and then get married when the time is right. . . but certain circumstances have prevented that. :cry:
Anyway, even now it seems a bit hopeless, even at such a young age. It is something that I have not been actively pursuing lately because of various reasons. Do not let yourself share my fate.
 
[quote name='bigdaddy']First of all I did do a classically bad gay joke. :p

Secondly, you haven't had sex? You keep hearing bullshit, stop watching TV and listening to bullshit and fuck someone, male or female, it doesn't matter. "I keep hearing..." that's a lame excuse, you don't need to date to have sex. On TV the guy always wants sex, and it makes it seem that it's the woman that doesn't, that's bullshit too. I have never met a women who didn't like having sex with their boyfriend or just a "friend"... except the ones that hit on me... :lol:

So go out there and live your life and stop "hearing" shit, experience it. You don't want a girlfriend fine. Do you want sex? You don't need a girlfriend for sex. If you don't want sex, also fine, but what you "hear" is from a small group that doesn't mean it's the majority view.[/quote]

I've been in some relationships and I've had sex. Part of the reason I like to be single is I know I'm not ready to put effort into one because it doesn't seem worth it and I want to be "responsible" and not fuck it up. I'm unfortunately the "nice guy" so I can't be a pathetic playa and pickup chicks just for sex. I want an actual relationship. although sometime I don't know why
 
[quote name='FunkyDoRight']I have to defend my stance more that enough on the fact that I want to stay single.

I'm 21 and have been single my whole life. I work all the time and I really don't want the hassle while I am trying to get my feet planted. I have watched my bro and friends get involved at younger ages and ended up living poor as hell and just bad off in general.

I guess I am wondering why it is so weird to people that I just don't care about dating?[/quote]

I'm 31 and happily single. That may change, but not any time soon. I like being able to do what I want, when I want. I also like as little drama in my life as possible. My last relationship had enough to last me a lifetime and I am sick of the bullshit. The thing that irks me is people think they need to find a reason for why I am single. They can't accept that I am single by choice.
 
Getting married means the numbers are against you. Even if the marriage doesn't end in divorce, that doesn't mean that it didn't/won't eventually fail. So much can go so wrong and you don't know what you're getting into until it's too late.

I don't think the James Bond lifestyle is the ultimate answer, either, but erring in that direction certainly gives you more 'outs' if/when things go bad. This shouldn't be an issue for anyone even close to your age. This is a LIFE DECISION, more so than any career you could pursue. Don't make it on account of the pressures from people mindlessly walking The Beaten Path (or typically antagonistic CAGs shooting spitwads from the back of the classroom because their destiny is being Citizen Klown).
 
[quote name='VipFREAK']I've been in some relationships and I've had sex. Part of the reason I like to be single is I know I'm not ready to put effort into one because it doesn't seem worth it and I want to be "responsible" and not fuck it up. I'm unfortunately the "nice guy" so I can't be a pathetic playa and pickup chicks just for sex. I want an actual relationship. although sometime I don't know why[/quote]

If I might ask, why would that be pathetic?
 
Ya, I'm in a somewhat similar situation. I'm 20, and I've never actually had a girlfriend before. I've tried to date numerous girls in the last year or so, but none of them have sparked to much of an interest in me to pursue further dates.

Now, I met a girl about a week ago that I find myself completely compatible with, but I can't tell if she likes me. We went on a date last night that ended after barely an hour. I went to this small festival held in her neighborhood, and I was a little bit nervous, which she detected and even pointed out. Conversation went well. Then we were going to go out and do something (either dinner, bowling, or something fun), when her friend called, who was in "trouble." She then gave me a hug and left.

Now, I don't know if she just wanted to ditch me or not, but I feel a little broken inside, because I actually really like her. Don't let someone you have a good feeling about run away. Pursue it, but don't actively look. Take it as it comes.

And if anyone has any advice on my situation, please feel free, I need a bit of comforting or something ;/
 
[quote name='SpazX']Well some people just don't really have much of an emotional need for companionship, so if that's the case then there's no reason why you shouldn't be single. If you actually would like a relationship and you just "don't want the hassle" I think maybe the problem is that the people you've known have had horrible relationships.

Like Koggit was saying, a gf/bf/husband/wife can really be a help financially and obviously emotionally, don't let your friends' bad relationships be the model for what all relationships are like. You just have to find somebody that you're really compatible with, something that the people you listed off obviously didn't do.[/quote]

Yes, I echo what Spaz says. Your friends' poor relationships are just one example from a sea of many. Also, dating can be expensive, so I understand what you mean when you say you "don't want the hassle" while trying to secure a career.
 
[quote name='DrunkTigerWoods']Once you find the right person, you'll change your tune. Not all ladies are selfish, greedy, attention-seeking time burglars.[/QUOTE]

no, but of them are!
 
First off, these tags are funny as hell.

Second off, I was kinda tripped out that this is one of the popular fourm threads.

And lastly, I have really enjoyed reading your opinions. It has kinda modified my outlook a small hair.
 
[quote name='Dark Slayer120']Shit I know I wanna be.[/QUOTE]I wish I had a girlfriend. I've been single since I've been 25, but not a SINGLE girl out there likes me, I KNOW it. But I've said it way too many times here.

Being single is nice because you can have more money/time for yourself; however, being lonely all your life would suck. I'm lonely now and worry I may never have a family.
 
[quote name='Lord Draconus777']Ya, I'm in a somewhat similar situation. I'm 20, and I've never actually had a girlfriend before. I've tried to date numerous girls in the last year or so, but none of them have sparked to much of an interest in me to pursue further dates.

Now, I met a girl about a week ago that I find myself completely compatible with, but I can't tell if she likes me. We went on a date last night that ended after barely an hour. I went to this small festival held in her neighborhood, and I was a little bit nervous, which she detected and even pointed out. Conversation went well. Then we were going to go out and do something (either dinner, bowling, or something fun), when her friend called, who was in "trouble." She then gave me a hug and left.

Now, I don't know if she just wanted to ditch me or not, but I feel a little broken inside, because I actually really like her. Don't let someone you have a good feeling about run away. Pursue it, but don't actively look. Take it as it comes.

And if anyone has any advice on my situation, please feel free, I need a bit of comforting or something ;/[/quote]


little kids die in africa every day, never reaching your age or economic status- your situation isn't too bad in the grand scheme of things
 
i was taking to cheapyD about a cheapass dating what do u think
 
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[quote name='starmask2k3']i'm was taking to cheapyD about a cheapass dating what do u think[/quote]

HAHAHA. We could pass around the few cag chicks......
 
[quote name='FunkyDoRight']HAHAHA. We could pass around the few cag chicks......[/QUOTE]

not like that like an free online dating u can find ur cheapassgamer
 
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