Employees of All Stores - Post your stupid customer stories - Part II-

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[quote name='munch']i don't get it.[/QUOTE]

I think he's attempting to say that most of his customers paid w/$20s. Oh, the horror! :-({|=
 
[quote name='munch']i don't get it.[/QUOTE]

It means people do not realize a cashier is not a bank, and like to buy $10 (or less) of crap and pay with a $50 or $100, assuming we have enough change to give them.

Actually came up last time I was at work... guy came in 1 hour after we opened to buy $10 of stuff with a $50. They don't give us tens, and most people don't come shop that early in the day... we had nothing bigger than a five in the entire register area. Plus, we only get $75 total to start the day, and 20 fives in the change safe. Meaning I'd have to empty out half of all the fives we had as backup for the day for this guy. When I told him he'd have to get his change in fives, he got annoyed, changed his mind and left.

Advice for any all paying cash with big bills- if your change is going to be more than $30 or so, ASK first. That way, I can at least call the manager to get the nessecary crap together to go into the bank vault and bring change while I'm ringing. And call a backup cashier to keep a line from building. (Plus, you now have the option to leave your crap with me for a while so you can visit the bank in our parking lot for change instead of waiting on us.)
 
The problem is that ATM's seem to only give out $20 bills. I hate going into a store and picking up an item for $2 or less and having to pay with a $20 because that is all I have. If the ATM gave the option to give out $5 and $10 bills, I know I would get them instead of $20 bills.
 
The whole change thing ALWAYS happens on Sundays, always. A parent buys their kid a $5 game and hands you a hundred dollar bill. And it's always early in the day, then they get a little upset that I can't break the change.

When you go to the bank or where ever the hell you go to change your check, ask for something smaller than a hundred.
 
[quote name='YoshiFan1']The problem is that ATM's seem to only give out $20 bills. I hate going into a store and picking up an item for $2 or less and having to pay with a $20 because that is all I have. If the ATM gave the option to give out $5 and $10 bills, I know I would get them instead of $20 bills.[/QUOTE]

I think most cashiers know that and don't get too miffed on 20s (I know I don't.) Plus, with a 20, the most you get in change is 3 fives and 4 ones (if you're a real cheapstake and buy a pack of gun or something.) I know I'm given enough change to handle that a couple times before I need to get more small bills.
 
Hmmm, never knew about that.

Went into a Gamestop this morning (about 10 min right after they opened) and got MK Shaolin Monks. Total was $54.11 and I payed with a $100 bill. The cashier started to freak out because he couldnt break it so I told him I had three $20s instead.
 
[quote name='DuelLadyS']It means people do not realize a cashier is not a bank, and like to buy $10 (or less) of crap and pay with a $50 or $100, assuming we have enough change to give them.

Actually came up last time I was at work... guy came in 1 hour after we opened to buy $10 of stuff with a $50. They don't give us tens, and most people don't come shop that early in the day... we had nothing bigger than a five in the entire register area. Plus, we only get $75 total to start the day, and 20 fives in the change safe. Meaning I'd have to empty out half of all the fives we had as backup for the day for this guy. When I told him he'd have to get his change in fives, he got annoyed, changed his mind and left.

Advice for any all paying cash with big bills- if your change is going to be more than $30 or so, ASK first. That way, I can at least call the manager to get the nessecary crap together to go into the bank vault and bring change while I'm ringing. And call a backup cashier to keep a line from building. (Plus, you now have the option to leave your crap with me for a while so you can visit the bank in our parking lot for change instead of waiting on us.)[/QUOTE]


That seems like a problem with your company (not you) more than the customers. You can't expect the customers to conform to how much change you guys have. If you know that the amount of change you start with isn't enough on a regular basis then maybe they should give you more change to start the day with.
 
Today a crackhead chewed through the plastic casing on a Sony CD Player in roughly 20 seconds and walked out with it. I can't even cut through that fucking shit with scissors, and this guy just devoured it.
 
[quote name='Puzznic']I have two quick stories from when i worked at Little Caesar's Pizza many years ago.


A guy walks in and asks if we sell Beach Cruiser Bicycle frames. He was completely serious. I say no and he just turns around and walks out.


Another time this big redneck guy came in with a Little Caesars coupon flyer that corporate sends to people's house. This guy was furious that we had the nerve to send him the coupons and demands that we never EVER send them to his house again. We let him know that we aren't the ones that send them out and he starts screaming, jumping around, and just acting crazy. He finally says that if we ever send him coupons in the mail again he will burn our store down and then runs out the door. I never saw him again.[/QUOTE]


That would scare the hell out of me! I hope I never have to deal with that!

I did have a few interesting customers yesterday. One customer wanted to order 10 half cheese half pepperoni. I told him it would be easier if he ordered five cheese and five pepperoni. I had to explain how it worked.

Another customer called in an order for a Canadian Bacon and Pineapple pizza. After it was made and in the oven he calles back and sounds a little nervous. He tells us his wife told him it should be ham and pineapple instead. And he would be in trouble if it had canadian bacon. We pull it out of the oven a few minutes later and get a really distraught call from the same guy saying that he is on the way to pick up the pizza and is in deep sh*t. It turns out it was supposed to be Canadian Bacon all along.
 
[quote name='Roufuss']Today a crackhead chewed through the plastic casing on a Sony CD Player in roughly 20 seconds and walked out with it. I can't even cut through that fucking shit with scissors, and this guy just devoured it.[/QUOTE]

LOL. that guy is fucken hardcore.
 
[quote name='DuelLadyS']It means people do not realize a cashier is not a bank, and like to buy $10 (or less) of crap and pay with a $50 or $100, assuming we have enough change to give them.[/QUOTE]

Every other day my first or second customer will buy a pizza with a $100 bill. They have nothing smaller. ( Final cost of one pizza = $5.41, Ammount in drawer 6x$5 50x$1 & change)


[quote name='Roufuss']Today a crackhead chewed through the plastic casing on a Sony CD Player in roughly 20 seconds and walked out with it. I can't even cut through that fucking shit with scissors, and this guy just devoured it.[/QUOTE]

I've tried that ( after purchasing the product and bringing it home) That packaging tore me up! I had about ten wide cuts on both hands. Though now I find box cutters work good. I was walking around my K-mart store one day and saw a hulk dvd case lying on the ground, I picked it up and the dvd was missing! Someone cut through the case and took only the dvd. Now I have to explain to LP why this DVD case has a DVD shaped hole in it.



Ok worst customers I ever had were at Game Stop. A male in his 20's came in with no shoes, a tournequite (sp) on his arm, and some liquid ( that will remain nameless) dripping from his arm. His gf had about 100 hole marks on each arm and about seven teeth. They spent about half an hour there begged for a free game, then bought a $3 football game.
 
I work at Lowe's and I am usually at the outside register and I close mostly. Well one night I was clsing and it was around 9:30 (close at 10:00) and I was pretty much bored. Well one customer came up and she was buying some dirt. So I rang it up and as I was getting some change for her twenty I felt some thing touch me. She was fucking poking my belly. Now im not a small man 6'2 and 300 lbs, but damn she got me jiggling. So I stood ther in shock and to top it all off she laughed and said "Big Belly!". She then asked me to help her with her dirt.........I did (put a hole in the bottom though). Damn all my evil has disapated.
 
[quote name='Dragonsbane']I work at Lowe's and I am usually at the outside register and I close mostly. Well one night I was clsing and it was around 9:30 (close at 10:00) and I was pretty much bored. Well one customer came up and she was buying some dirt. So I rang it up and as I was getting some change for her twenty I felt some thing touch me. She was fucking poking my belly. Now im not a small man 6'2 and 300 lbs, but damn she got me jiggling. So I stood ther in shock and to top it all off she laughed and said "Big Belly!". She then asked me to help her with her dirt.........I did (put a hole in the bottom though). Damn all my evil has disapated.[/QUOTE]

:lol: I'm sorry but that sounds funny (still rude, though). Was she from another country, maybe? In her culture it might be a compliment on your manhood. Hey, I'm just trying to find the bright side to this.
 
I've got another (long) story, but a comment on the cash thing first:

I have the same problems with making change where I work. We start the day with $75 in the drawer and mostly 20's and ones in the safe. It pisses me off, too, but it's 100% the store's fault. They should have enough cash on hand to make change. We shouldn't blame customers for wanting to pay with legal tender, even if they are being asses about it. Money's money.

Anyways...

I had a nice pair of confrontations with an old man a couple weeks ago. He carried around what I assumed was an oxygen tank and was in pretty bad health. He could walk and everything, but he looked like crap. And he had an attitude to match. I can't say I blame him for being so pissy, but he was one of those guys who just made noise to make noise. He was looking for things to complain about.

Another worked had ordered him some repair parts for an air compressor, which were shipped to his home, and he came into the store to return them. His order shipped in two packages, and the first time he came in, he only had half the order. He threw it at me and started swearing about how the store was horrible. While he was spewing like an idiot, I checked out the package and saw that it hadn't even been opened yet. I asked him what the deal was, and he pointed out a rip on the surface; the rip hadn't even gone through the package. He wanted to know "why the hell you sent me a piece of shit like that, how do I know that stuff isn't broken in there? Why did you do that?" That's when I realized he was out of his damn mind, so I decided I wasn't going to put up with his crap.

I told him to blame UPS (he was actually blaming ME). Then I opened the package and remarked about the nice condition of the parts, as they of course hadn't been damaged. That made him even madder. He started complaining about how long it had taken for the parts to get to his house. I checked his receipt... he ordered them the Saturday before Labor Day right before we closed, meaning his order didn't even get processed until Tuesday. It was Thursday. Apparently the time between Tuesday and Thursday is "forever."

I just looked at him and said, "So you received these parts in perfect condition, just as you ordered them, in less than a week total, two days after your order was processed, and you're unhappy about it?"

He again informed me that this was no way to run a business. Kinda ironic. So I go about entering the information into the computer to give him a refund. I tell him how much he's getting back and he almost has a heart attack.

"WHY AINT I GETTIN ALL MY DAMN MONEY BACK? WHY YOU KEEPING MY MONEY?"

He wanted a refund for the other part of his order that had already been shipped but he hadn't received yet. I thought it was common sense that you only get a refund for what you ACTUALLY RETURN, but I may be way off base on that, who knows. So I tell him to bring the other part back for a refund when he gets it, which I felt slightly bad about considering his condition. I didn't feel bad for very long, though, because he started bitching about getting his shipping and handling back.

(RANT) This is really a pet peeve of mine... people want their shipping and handling refunded when they decide they no longer want to keep something they've ordered. What the hell makes them think they're entitled to that? The damn postal service doesn't work for free. You don't see volunteer UPS men running around in their little brown shorts for the hell of it. You pay a shipping charge because it COSTS MONEY to send something, not because the store wants to make an extra ten bucks off you. I have no problem refunding shipping charges if my store has made an error, because that error has resulted in an inconvenience for the customer. But when the customer decides they just don't want to keep something, it's not the store's fault.

Anyway... I make reference once again to the fact that his order was completed as promised by the store, and refuse to refund his shipping. He vows to return with the rest of his order...

...and he does just that two days later. This time, I don't have the priviledge of waiting on him, but I do get to overhear the whining and nastiness he dishes out to someone else. When he completes the transaction with my coworker, I wait for the sound of the door bell to tell me he's gone, and then I come around the corner and start telling my coworker about dealing with him the first time. She said something to the effect of "yeah, he's nasty, maybe someone stepped on his oxygen tube this morning," to which I replied "maybe someone SHOULD have stepped on his oxygen tube this morning." Then we hear shuffling on the other side of the store. Turns out he's STILL INSIDE and that the bell rang when another customer left. Not sure if he heard us, but he left without incident.

I call this one a wash: he was a complete asshole, but I accidentally got him back when I wished death upon him. Oh well.
 
I used to work at a KB Toy store. We used to have a public bathroom in the place, but because of constant abuse, we ended up closing it. There were public restrooms in the stores on either side of us, so it shouldn't of been a problem. However, one day a lady and her son came in and asked my manager where the bathrooms were. My manager calmly explained that we did not have a public restroom. Well, the lady got upset, and started wandering around the store. We had other customers to help, so we thought nothing of it. A few minutes later she was found peeing in our backhallway, while her son kept watch. I'm so glad I wasn't told to clean it up.
 
[quote name='YoshiFan1']The problem is that ATM's seem to only give out $20 bills. I hate going into a store and picking up an item for $2 or less and having to pay with a $20 because that is all I have. If the ATM gave the option to give out $5 and $10 bills, I know I would get them instead of $20 bills.[/QUOTE]

When I visit where I grew up, I know I'm really in West Virginia because the ATMs dispense $1 bills.
 
[quote name='2poor']LOL. that guy is fucken hardcore.[/QUOTE]

People on crack really feel no pain.. I must see two or three of them a day, most of them don't really cause trouble, they just walk around kind of oblivious to everything, but every once in awhile there is some crazy guy like that one.

You gotta love the kids that come HANG OUT in fucking K-Mart... I do not understand that. Of all the things they could be doing, why would you possibly want to hang out in a K-Mart, of all places?

I know that whenever security is called, it's always kids messing around, and I know they'll always wander back into my dept. I can't wait for the day when I can take the demo units out so they leave me alone. I mean, the people who buy the systems never USE the demo units anyways, it's always gangbangers or parents who drop their children off in electronics banging away on them.

The best question I got lately is that a lady brings up a pair of 4.99 headphones to the desk, and says "So these come with the plug to hook them up to a cd player or a walkman, right?". She thought that the headphones just came by themselves, without the cable you use to actually plug them in. She then proceeded to ask me how crisp the sound quality was. For 4.99, what does she honestly expect??

A second one: A lady asks me if we carry VHS tapes, and I show her the (very small) selection. She then starts bitching and moaning about how "no one carries VHS tapes, everyone is moving onto DVD, not everyone can afford a DVD player". I proceeded to be an ass at this point, because I hate that argument (we sell DVD players for as low as $25 dollars, give me a break), and tell her that soon the industry is moving away from DVD as well. She starts cussing and saying how the movie companies are only trying to screw hard working people out of their cash, and leaves the store.

Hell, she was looking for a movie that never even got released to VHS I believe.

A girl once asked me if "we have that machine that lets you preview cd's before you buy them". I have TWO small aisles in my store for CD's, why would she possibly think I have the same machine FYE does? Hell, Best Buy's CD selection is twice as big as my entire dept.

I get asked what an mp3 is almost every day, multiple times a day. When I mention they are music files through the computer, used in mp3 players like the Ipod, I get asked "What's an Ipod? I've never heard of it". This isn't just older people, this is ALL customers.

I also hear about how fullscreen is the greatest thing for DVD's on a regular basis as well, that one almost makes me sick.
 
Another great story: The other day I hear this loud loud screaming coming from the back of the store. A lady is just screaming at the top of her lungs, "WE WILL GET THERE SOON, JUST SHUT UP, ing SHUT UP," over and over. I'm about ready to call security, I thought it was just another crackhead screaming at her boyfriend or something.

The lady rounds the corner, and it is this 30 year old woman, being followed by 7 year old boy and a roughly 5 year old girl, who is crying. She comes to buy the barbie pegasus DVD, we have it on sale for 14.99 but the idiots at the factory put 13.99 on the sticker, this same obnoxious lady proceeds to rub it in my face how she's going to get the lower price. I proceed to close my drawer right in front of her, and tell her that service desk would love to help her (I was done with the day anyways). I then proceed to re-label all the DVD's 14.99, so that she has no ground to stand on, since all the other ones would then be labeled 14.99 and she wouldn't get shit.

Later on, I asked security who she was possibly yelling at - she was yelling at her 5 year old daughter, they assumed it must have been about that DVD.

Which reminds me, my favorite thing everyday is getting told that "Target / Wal-Mart has this cheaper"... that's great, go shop over there! Why do they feel the need to tell me this, I'm not changing the price for them or anything like that. The best part is they decide to buy what the item is anyways, even though Target AND Wal-Mart are a 2-3 minute drive away.
 
[quote name='DuelLadyS']It means people do not realize a cashier is not a bank, and like to buy $10 (or less) of crap and pay with a $50 or $100, assuming we have enough change to give them.
[/QUOTE]

This happens to me everyday. The best part is when you tell them that you can't break their $100 on a $5 dollar purchase, so they go back into their wallet / purse and pull out two $5's or a $10. That just boggles my mind, they think I have some kind of infinite amount of change in my drawer.
 
ahh... best buy I worked there from the ages of 16-18 and you know some people need legitamate help but here are a few dumb senarios I have found my self in:

1. I am standing in the DVD section Zoning during x-mas time to help all of the customers and ask them if they need assistance and so on. Then I am approached by a customer who says and I qoute "Where do you keep your DVD's?" mind you I have dvds in my hand from putting them back after customers pick them up and sit them where they feel like, there are 10 rows of dvd's directly behind me, and there is a big sign above the section that says "DVD Movies" I say to the customer "I'm sorry we don't carry dvd's" and then they turn to walk away and I tell them im kidding and help them find what they need.

2. A customer is at the cashier and asks the cashier "do you sell pc software?" The cashier calls back to me at the media computer desk I pick up the phone and she asks me the same question. I turn to the left where the huge section of PC Software with the big sign over it saying "Software" and look up at the registers to see which cashier im talking to and I say "yes, yes we do" she says "thank you" Later i go up to her when were not busy and point to the sign and all she can do is bust out laughing. I guess it was like her second day and she had never shopped there before or something but I just find it amazing that someone could ask a question like that.
 
I work at a grocery store on summers and Winter break called Farm Fresh as a sales and service clerk. I have the misfortune of working at one that is by both low income housing and elderly apartments. I have nothing against the groups mentioned (except the jerks), but both of those groups have a large amount of assholes. I work at the sales and service desk, and i have to deal with ticketmaster, money orders/money transfers, bills, lotto, and of course customer complaints.

Anyway, there is this old couple that are always assholes and send a TON of money through Money Gram (same type of thing as Western Union). One week they sent I believe $18,000 including 9000 on the same transaction. One day they come in asking for a refund because it didn't get to the destination. I take a look at the receipts and notice right away that its a different name on both. I'm not busy so I call money gram and the lady informs me that one has already been picked up and that the other one has been frozen for suspicion of fraud. She tells me to ask them some stuff then ends up talking to them herself. Of course I have a line by this point, so I help the others. About 10 minutes later I get the phone back, the lady from money gram says that I need to have the person whose name it was sent under present their ID. They said that person was hospitalized and they were sending to a friend. I tell them I can't help them and after them flipping out, they finally leave.

I thought this was over, but 3 hours later they come in. They present a phone number and tell me to call this number and use the extension for this person. At this point I tell them that I can't help them and the older man screams "FARM FRESH IS GONNA PAY FOR YOUR AMBULANCE" loud enough so that every customer and employee turns their head. I call the manager to the front then he proceeds to call money gram! Meanwhile, he pushes the silent alarm button when they aren't looking, so I suspect he is stalling them. The officer comes about 20 minutes later and talks to them and they finally leave. About 10 minutes later, my manager (he was new to the company) comes up to me and politely asks me not to call the police without telling him first, and I respond by explaining to him that he was pressing the silent alarm. I haven't seen them since, I suspect they use Western Union now.
 
My story isn't my stupidest story, but most recent. Anyways, a guy comes up to me with a Levi's denim jacket. He asks if it would shrink a little. I go it will because it is 100% cotton. His response was, "100% cotton, really? This looks just like denim though." "Uhm, sir, i believe almost all denim is made from cotton." Puzzled look and then recovers by saying "o yeah, i think i remember knowing that before. thanks."
 
From today:

Customer gets a credit card refund and is handed a receipt.

Him: "So I don't get a receipt?"
Coworker: "That's it right there."
Him: "No, something that shows how much money I'm getting back."
Coworker: "You're holding it."
Him: "So I have no proof that the money was put back on my card?"
Coworker: "That shows you got a refund."
Him: "I understand what you're saying, but I want proof that I'm getting credit."
Coworker: *points to receipt* "See that negative sign next to the total and where it says 'AMOUNT REFUNDED?'"
Him: "Oh, that's what I wanted."

Idiots.
 
Here's a few other short ones that I have to use just about everyday. Right now I work at Home Depot in the paint department. Which of course means wearing that horrid orange apron.

Customer: "Can I ask you a question?"
Me: "You just did. Would you like to ask another?"

Customer 2: "Do you work here?"
Me: "No, the orange apron is a fashion statement".

KBToys had the more interesting stories though...but I can't think of any good ones at the moment. I'm still mad they closed us down.
 
I work at CC for those that don't know, and today one of the CSA's called in. I'm a product specialist, but they grabbed me to cover the front counter near the mall entrance that the CSAs cover. It seems like every idiot that walks in throws their crap down on my counter and then says "I want to return this". March your ass up to customer service you dumb f***, does it look like I can take your returns here? Of course, I don't say it like that.

Anyway, the biggest ****ing idiot I've ever encountered in the last week talked to me today. He walked in while I was stuck up at that horrible front register, and said "Where are your doorbells?"

"....doorbells?"

"Yeah! Im looking for a really LOUD doorbell. One with a lot of, POWER."

"...We dont have doorbells. This is an entertainment superstore not a hardware store."

The guy looked digusted and walked out, what a dipshit
 
[quote name='SierraNight']
Customer 2: "Do you work here?"
Me: "No, the orange apron is a fashion statement".
.[/QUOTE]

I wear a red shirt, have all the keys to the electronics dept, a name badge, AND i'm behind the register and still get asked that. Hell, one time I had the games case OPEN and I was actively helping someone else, and someone STILL asked me if I worked there.
 
[quote name='Roufuss']I wear a red shirt, have all the keys to the electronics dept, a name badge, AND i'm behind the register and still get asked that. Hell, one time I had the games case OPEN and I was actively helping someone else, and someone STILL asked me if I worked there.[/QUOTE]

Oh God, tell me about it. I've been putting money in my cash register and had people ask me that before! "No, no, I don't work here, just stealing some money...want some?".

[quote name='Roufuss']
I also hear about how fullscreen is the greatest thing for DVD's on a regular basis as well, that one almost makes me sick.[/QUOTE]

And don't even bother trying to explain it to them, people never seem to understand it. It's always "they make the picture smaller" or "they cut off the top and the bottom of the movie". Even with visial aids, they don't get it. I've tried multiple times.
 
[quote name='ngamer007']
Anyway, the biggest ****ing idiot I've ever encountered in the last week talked to me today. He walked in while I was stuck up at that horrible front register, and said "Where are your doorbells?"

"....doorbells?"

"Yeah! Im looking for a really LOUD doorbell. One with a lot of, POWER."

"...We dont have doorbells. This is an entertainment superstore not a hardware store."

The guy looked digusted and walked out, what a dipshit[/QUOTE]

Well, I mean.. "CIRCUIT" city.. no reason to be rude to him, it's not like he came in asking where the 2x4's were..
 
I had a call the other day, I work at EB and those of us that work there know that you're supposed to go through this phone intro that basically says "Thank you for calling EB Games [fill in sale or preorder info here] this is [employee name] how can I help you?" or something along those lines. Here's the basic gist of the conversation.

Me: Thank you for calling EB Games, how can I help you? (shortened from actual message)
Lady: What is this?
Me: I'm sorry?
Lady: What do you do there?
Me: This is a video game store...EB Games...we sell video games.
Lady: What kind of video games do you sell?
Me: All kind...computer, XBOX, PS2, Gamecube, Playstation, Gameboy...pretty much any game.
Lady: Who all shops there?
Me: I'm sorry?
Lady: Who all can shop there?
Me: What do you mean?
Lady: Is anyone allowed to shop there or do you have to be a member?
Me: As long as you've got the money to buy it, you're allowed to buy it.
Lady: Alright, thank you.
Me: Have a good day.

It was the weirdest damn phone call I think I've ever had there. I don't really have any good stories dealing with actual customers. The best I've got there is I had some guy tell me he'd never come back because I wouldn't let him use his wife's credit card without his wife there with him. If your wife wants you to use her credit card, she should be there with you...credit cards are issued to one person only and you're generally supposed to verify ID before you accept them.
 
[quote name='Level Jumper']The best I've got there is I had some guy tell me he'd never come back because I wouldn't let him use his wife's credit card without his wife there with him. If your wife wants you to use her credit card, she should be there with you...credit cards are issued to one person only and you're generally supposed to verify ID before you accept them.[/QUOTE]

This used to be one of my favorite things over at KB. Person would come in with brother, wife, aunt, or wife's brother's mother's cousin's credit card then start screaming when we didn't accept it. "Well, they acepted it over at Wal-mart!" Great, shop there, and hope your credit card never gets stolen so whoever stole it can go to wal-mart and use it. I also loved the ones who would get upset with me for telling them they should sign the back of their cards. I even explained to them how I could steal their card, sign their name on it on the back in my handwriting, and then I would match the authorized signature. They still would scream at me and call me crazy.
 
[quote name='Stick821']I guess I'll give mine:

About 5 years ago i worked at winn-dixie, it was slow so me and the cashier girl was just standing up front when we see this extremely obese man walk by with a purse in his buggy. we both looked at each other and said nice purse. Right after that we hear a woman scream "My purse! My purse!" Needless to say fatty took off running and my manager proceeded to chase him. I took off behind the manager because he was a little guy. When the thief got in the car the manager jumped in there with him and threw the purse out, but proceeded to beat the thief with a mag lite that was laying in his car. I was able to go to the other side and get a few cheap shots in, but he was able to get his car started and took off with my manager hanging out of the passenger side. My manager falls out as our crack police force pulls up and says "What's wrong?"

I would have to say that was my most exciting night in my 2 year career as a bag boy.[/QUOTE]
And all because of Winn-Dixie.
 
[quote name='SierraNight']This used to be one of my favorite things over at KB. Person would come in with brother, wife, aunt, or wife's brother's mother's cousin's credit card then start screaming when we didn't accept it. "Well, they acepted it over at Wal-mart!" Great, shop there, and hope your credit card never gets stolen so whoever stole it can go to wal-mart and use it. I also loved the ones who would get upset with me for telling them they should sign the back of their cards. I even explained to them how I could steal their card, sign their name on it on the back in my handwriting, and then I would match the authorized signature. They still would scream at me and call me crazy.[/QUOTE]

Half the people I get have 'see ID' written on the back of their card instead of a signature. It kind of makes sense- I will be the first to admit I often don't check ID-but c'mon, if you don't sign it, I can't compare your name to anything. Hell, 'see ID' would make a theive's life easier- 1 fake ID with that person's name late, they can go wherever they want with it!
 
[quote name='Dragonsbane']I work at Lowe's and I am usually at the outside register and I close mostly. Well one night I was clsing and it was around 9:30 (close at 10:00) and I was pretty much bored. Well one customer came up and she was buying some dirt. So I rang it up and as I was getting some change for her twenty I felt some thing touch me. She was fucking poking my belly. Now im not a small man 6'2 and 300 lbs, but damn she got me jiggling. So I stood ther in shock and to top it all off she laughed and said "Big Belly!". She then asked me to help her with her dirt.........I did (put a hole in the bottom though). Damn all my evil has disapated.[/QUOTE]

Was she Bhudist? Maybe she thought you were the messiah?


Well, i dont really have a stupid customer story, just something about stupid customers in general. A few years ago i worked at Sams Club (warehouse store, like Costco) as a rotisserie chicken cook. Now, the thing about Sams Club customers, they think that since they have to pay to get in the doors, that they are higher than god. We werent even allowed to call them customers, they were 'members'. Anyways, some of the things i witnessed, it was almost straight out of Clerks. People would spend a good 10-15 minutes picking up, examining, and sometimes shaking every single chicken that we had sitting out there.

Another thing that annoyed me was people trying to convince me that they needed a chicken straight out of the oven (even if they werent completely cooked yet). They normally went along the lines of this:

Me: Can i help you?
"Member": Yes, when will those chickens be done?
Me: In about 20 minutes
"Member": Oh no, is there any way i can still get one of them?
Me: Sorry, we cant do that.
"Member": Oh but (insert story here, somewhere along the lines of 'Timmy's stuck in a coma and the only thing that can pull him out of it is a fresh out of the oven chicken')
(to which i want to reply, 'Sorry, but if you want a poorly cooked chicken, theres a KFC down the street'

I also had a lady try to sweet talk me into getting one of the chickens by saying i have 'cute eyebrows'. I just stared at her for a few secs, and said thanks.

Worked there for 3 weeks, then luckily got a call from an office job that paid a hell of a lot more.
 
Here is one from the final days of my KB Toy Works experience. We were on one of our last days open to the public, everything in the store was 75% off, and the shelves were next to empty. Practically the only thing left were toys in beat up boxes, that were 10 years old of ugly characters from unpopular TV series, and about 100 N'sync dolls. Anyways, this little boy and his mother who had always been a pain came in and started to yell at my cashier for not offering her a flyer (lol..flyer for a going out of business sale) and saying no one took her around the store to help her find everything (there was ONE aisle of stuff left!) and demanded to have the number for the KB home office because the cashier was rude. The cashier on duty is one of the nicest women I have ever meet, but has had problems with this customer before. I got the customer the number from the back because I just wanted her out of my store as quickly as possible. By the time I got back up to the register she had degraded into calling my cashier a bitch and a fat cow, and demanded she be fired on the spot. My cashier was practically crying. I had enough at that point so I threw the number on the counter and told her to leave the store. She then decided to start throwing toys at my head. I had to get my other associate to escort her out of the building, her swearing and screaming in front of her kid the whole way. We told her to get in her car and never come back, and that we were calling the cops.

A week later we got a letter from the Better Business Bureau stating we had a complaint against us from her. Normally that would be a serious matter, but by then the store was closed, so we didn't care. Apparently in the complaint she stated we made her boy cry thinking his mother was going to be sent to jail. Bet it never crossed her mind that maybe he was crying because his mother was a raving lunatic.
 
[quote name='Bezerker']Was she Bhudist? Maybe she thought you were the messiah?


Well, i dont really have a stupid customer story, just something about stupid customers in general. A few years ago i worked at Sams Club (warehouse store, like Costco) as a rotisserie chicken cook. Now, the thing about Sams Club customers, they think that since they have to pay to get in the doors, that they are higher than god. We werent even allowed to call them customers, they were 'members'. Anyways, some of the things i witnessed, it was almost straight out of Clerks. People would spend a good 10-15 minutes picking up, examining, and sometimes shaking every single chicken that we had sitting out there.

Another thing that annoyed me was people trying to convince me that they needed a chicken straight out of the oven (even if they werent completely cooked yet). They normally went along the lines of this:

Me: Can i help you?
"Member": Yes, when will those chickens be done?
Me: In about 20 minutes
"Member": Oh no, is there any way i can still get one of them?
Me: Sorry, we cant do that.
"Member": Oh but (insert story here, somewhere along the lines of 'Timmy's stuck in a coma and the only thing that can pull him out of it is a fresh out of the oven chicken')
(to which i want to reply, 'Sorry, but if you want a poorly cooked chicken, theres a KFC down the street'

I also had a lady try to sweet talk me into getting one of the chickens by saying i have 'cute eyebrows'. I just stared at her for a few secs, and said thanks.

Worked there for 3 weeks, then luckily got a call from an office job that paid a hell of a lot more.[/QUOTE]


The coma thing happens at my store pretty often, too. People will either want to return a very old item or want the item sent out for free repair long after the warranty has expired, and they always offer the worst stories to justify their situation.

Most of the time I get the line "But it ain't worked right since I got it!" That one's just stupid, because it really means "I'm lying, and if I'm not lying, I'm so damn lazy that I waited over a year to do anything about this. Bail out my irresponsible ass."

But some people think excuses sound better, so they launch into stories about how they couldn't bring in their item during the warranty because something was stopping them. Having cancer is a pretty popular excuse, sad as it may be. They'll say they've been in the hospital for six months for whatever reason: coma, lung cancer, gang fight stab wounds, brain surgery, siamese twin separation, etc. Then when those excuses don't fly, they'll say they only used the item once (very popular) or didn't open it until a year after they got it. I had one guy actually say he bought a dishwasher and kept it in a warehouse for two years before he opened it, and that it was broken right out of the box. I didn't believe him, but I asked him why the heck he kept it in a warehouse for two years to begin with. He said he didn't need it yet. Yeah. He got nothing.
 
[quote name='JimmieMac']Anyone that wants any red meat cooked more than Medium.[/QUOTE]

Maybe some people like their meat cooked well done?

What's the problem with that?
 
[quote name='JimmieMac']Anyone that wants any red meat cooked more than Medium.[/QUOTE]

In a grocery store, I could see the stupidity.

In a restaurant, I don't. I like my steak like Buddy Holly.
 
Today was REEEAAAALLY slow, we had like 2 customers for my entire shift and 1 phone call, a stupid phone call I may add.

Me: Gamecrazy, where we buy, sell and trade used games, how may I help you?
Guy: Do you have God of War?
Me: Yes, we have it new for $50 and used for $45
Guy: Oh, ok
Me: Would you like to come down and buy it? I could hold it for a while
Guy: Oh, naw, I was just asking, I hated that game
*click*

And so the rest of my shift, I played The One Piece Rap (a full 4 minute version from iTunes) on the stereo over and over and over...
 
I love customers who come in to ask for a movie but cant remember the title, who was in it, or what is was about. "do you have the movie with the guy in it who shoots this other guy after sleeping with his wife, you know that movie right, with the girl from that other movie about..." If only they were specific I could have helped them but I just tell them to check the new release wall to help them refresh their memories, or until they give up. Most of the time I can tell them the movie they are looking for if they say "rollerblading, mustang car chase, jack black movie, etc"
 
[quote name='nakanenui']I love customers who come in to ask for a movie but cant remember the title, who was in it, or what is was about. "do you have the movie with the guy in it who shoots this other guy after sleeping with his wife, you know that movie right, with the girl from that other movie about..." If only they were specific I could have helped them but I just tell them to check the new release wall to help them refresh their memories, or until they give up. Most of the time I can tell them the movie they are looking for if they say "rollerblading, mustang car chase, jack black movie, etc"[/QUOTE]

Reading this remnided me of clerks.
OOOOH! NAVY SEALS!
 
This happened a few nights ago:

Guy comes in and brings in a PS2 that he wants to sell for cash. I hook everything up and hit the eject button. I turn around to grab a few games out of the shelves to test the system. When I turn back around, I notice a disc inside the PS2. I kneel down to take a look at it, and it's a "Hot College Bitches" DVD, complete with a girl with her tits hanging out on it. I immediately start laughing my ass off and then tap the assistant manager on the shoulder. I point down at the disc tray and he starts to laugh as well. I grab the DVD, hand it to the guy, and say "Here you go man, I think you left something in there." The guy's face goes red and he buries it into his hand. "At least I'm not a homosexual, right?" he said. I kept laughing the entire time I was testing out his PS2, but I felt dirty touching the controllers. After I handed him the cash, he said "I'm glad you're laughing at this. I hope it made your day." I reply with "I'm sorry man, I just think that it's really funny." He says "No, it's fine. At least you don't think I'm a dirty pervert or anything." He then turns around and walks out, his face still red. I washed my hands immediately afterwards.

The assistant manager said it's the third time he's seen something like that happen.
 
[quote name='Arikado']This happened a few nights ago:

Guy comes in and brings in a PS2 that he wants to sell for cash. I hook everything up and hit the eject button. I turn around to grab a few games out of the shelves to test the system. When I turn back around, I notice a disc inside the PS2. I kneel down to take a look at it, and it's a "Hot College Bitches" DVD, complete with a girl with her tits hanging out on it. I immediately start laughing my ass off and then tap the assistant manager on the shoulder. I point down at the disc tray and he starts to laugh as well. I grab the DVD, hand it to the guy, and say "Here you go man, I think you left something in there." The guy's face goes red and he buries it into his hand. "At least I'm not a homosexual, right?" he said. I kept laughing the entire time I was testing out his PS2, but I felt dirty touching the controllers. After I handed him the cash, he said "I'm glad you're laughing at this. I hope it made your day." I reply with "I'm sorry man, I just think that it's really funny." He says "No, it's fine. At least you don't think I'm a dirty pervert or anything." He then turns around and walks out, his face still red. I washed my hands immediately afterwards.

The assistant manager said it's the third time he's seen something like that happen.[/QUOTE]

Well lets hope whoever buys that one doesnt return it claiming of fishy smells coming from it :p.
 
[quote name='nakanenui']I love customers who come in to ask for a movie but cant remember the title, who was in it, or what is was about. "do you have the movie with the guy in it who shoots this other guy after sleeping with his wife, you know that movie right, with the girl from that other movie about..." If only they were specific I could have helped them but I just tell them to check the new release wall to help them refresh their memories, or until they give up. Most of the time I can tell them the movie they are looking for if they say "rollerblading, mustang car chase, jack black movie, etc"[/QUOTE]

At BB I got really good at this they would be all like "Guy with a kane beats people and rapes girl" and I'd be all like "Clockwork Orange" Or they be like "you know that one where the Dogs go on that adventure with the Cat" Id be all like "Homeward bound" We had A guy that was good at doing that with music too which is incredible to me. They would be like "the one with the guy who plays the cash register" and he'd be all like "Money by pink floyd its on the album dark side of the moon"

We also had the people come in and they would have a christmas list and name everything off it and want me to show them where it was, I would start taking the list from them and there cart and getting it all for them becuase it was soo much faster.
 
[quote name='Scoobert']I will tell you to hold but somehow I always "forget" you're on the phone.[/QUOTE]

I had a bitch at a GS do that shit to me once. All I needed was a quick price, cause the location was not close to me and I didn't want to drive all that way for nothing. She put me on hold and after 5 minutes I hung up and called back. She answered the phone again, and real politely, I explained I was waiting on a price and no one came back on the phone. She got real defensive and told me that she had customers and she forgot about me. I really wanted to drive down there and inform her manager on what happened, but I just decided to stop going to that store all together. Because of her, I found EB and I have rarely ever gone back to GS. An employee should never make a customer feel unimportant or like they are being inconvenienced. Not if you want to keep costumers that is.
 
[quote name='MrMaddness']Yeah...those costumers are always hard to keep.[/QUOTE]

Hey, you can get as high and mighty as you want. If you feel that is acceptable, then that is your business. Some people like abuse or rudeness. Hell, there is a resturant in San Antonio called Dick's where the entire wait staff are supposed to be rude and insult the customers. If you are ever in the area, it's on the river walk. You seem like you might like the place.
 
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