Employees of all stores--post your stupid customer stories--part III

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[quote name='io']Oh, and Cold Stone Creamery sucks since they decided to get rid of the coffee yogurt. My staple was coffee yogurt with roasted almonds. Mmmmmm... almonds... The coffee ice cream they have now is WAY too rich - might as well just inject the damn stuff into my veins.[/quote]

Yes, we here at Cold Stone are looking to introduce a new medical phenomena: ice cream-induced heart failure.

I agree with you totally, the ice cream is WAY too rich. I won't eat anything but the sorbets.
 
[quote name='Demolition Man']Yep that is about right as he played the Oakland Coliseum Arena on 9/26/87 that year according to RogerWatersOnline.com. The David Gilmour lead Floyd band was there from 12/3-12/6 that year.[/QUOTE]

Yep, I was at both. It was very strange seeing them both perform Comfortably Numb (I think RW did this?) and Another Brick in the Wall (I know they both did this).

Anyway, enough about ancient music (hey, I was a teenager in the 80's and the music sucked hard, so I had to go back to the 60's/70's to find the good stuff!). On to more employee horror stories!
 
The Harry Potter one is definately classic. Yeesh.... its just a fantasy fiction book. I can't believe some people out there actually believe that Harry Potter will lead their kids to a life of witchcraft, satan worshipping, and the like.

Hell I watched "Die Hard" when I was a kid. You don't see me acting like John McClaine now do you? ;)
 
[quote name='Demolition Man']...Hell I watched "Die Hard" when I was a kid. You don't see me acting like John McClaine now do you? ;)[/quote]
"yipee ki yay motherfucker!" :cool:
 
^ I mean wow, I thought the On Star parody about a blond who locked herself out of her car while having the key in her pocket was funny, but calling the cops over that is just plain ridiculous. I can understand if something "extra" was added to the burger that may cause a health issue. :)
 
[quote name='anotherpoorgamer']I can understand if something "extra" was added to the burger that may cause a health issue. :)[/QUOTE]

But would you call the cops over something so trivial as that?
 
^ Sorry for the confusion, I should have explained "extra." I meant I'd definitely consider calling the cops if it was like rat poisen, bug spray, cleaning products, or something that would never normally be in a fastfood place. I don't know if it was a simple mistake or they're randomly trying to get back at people who complain about the food. To be honest, if I found a hair, bandaid, a bug or rat in the burger I'd ask for a refund and walk away without trying to make a scene.
 
I liked when she tried to act all in a rush by saying: "I have to get on the toll road."

It saddens me that this lady lives in my area.
But I understand b/c I get silly customers like her at work all the time, like ones that call the police when you refuse to issue them a refund for an item w/out a receipt.
 
[quote name='ironmouse']I can't top that. That is not even close to being english.[/QUOTE]

Good. Shut up.
 
Alright, I need to tell two just to break up this stupid argument you people are having.

A young lady comes in normally and tries to get passed me without showing a card. When I ask her for one, she acts snooty and says that her mom is inside. I say that I still can't let her in. She says that her mom is waiting for her inside and the mom has a card, therefore I should let her in. Bullshit. I ask if there's a way for her to contact her mom. She says that her phone gets no signal in the store, "Verizon doesn't reach in here"; so I bring out my verizon phone and show her my perfect signal. She flips her hair and says fine in a huff and tries to call her mom, all the while saying what bullshit it is that I'm not letting her in to anyone around her. One of my coworkers walks by and I catch him and ask him to escort her to her mom to make sure that she is actually in there. I think nothing of it and go on about my job again. Fast forward 20 minutes where I am at the other side of the door and notice that both the 'young lady' and her 'mom' were yelling at Membership where they are all friends of mine. I just watch them and keep on marking people out. Eventually I see one of the supervisors come up and talk to them, and I lose track of them though they do go to the person opposite me to be checked out. I ask Membership what the lady had said and she was describing how rude I was and how I should be fired. I ask the supervisor about it, seeing if anything'd actually happen because of it, and he mentioned how I shouldn't be so rude and should remember that I'm in "Member Service". Annoying uptight bitch.

A couple days later and all is forgotten. I'm a closer and at the exit. The entrance door is closed and we're not allowed to let anyone inside the exit door. It's a beautiful day and I don't really care about too much right about then, chatting away with customers and being cool. I check out one lady and she says that she'll be back because she'd ordered a pizza and still needs to pick it up. I can let her in because she'd already paid for it, and to not allow her to have something she'd already paid for is not something I'd do; besides, she was pretty nice. This is however about the lady who had left before her. That lady had tried to come back in and when I told her she couldn't she said that she just wanted to use the pop machines. I said that she couldn't again and was sorry. I see her walk away and chat with her husband and pull out her phone. I figure she's just calling someone and they would leave soon. I check out a few more customers and see them talking to one of the people outside getting carts. Afterwards he comes up and says that she is calling corporate about how rude I was and how I wouldn't allow her to come and use the pop machines. I tell him I don't care, that's what I was told to do and he just shrugs. I start talking to the supervisor that is close by and warn him that someone is going to call and complain about me and I explain. He tells me I should've told them to go to walmart.
 
[quote name='jPoD']Good. Shut up.[/QUOTE]

Not for you numb nuts.

But I do have a story to share. I don't work any sort of retail, I work in a vet clinic, but that doesn't mean I don't run into some very stupid people. A lady calls the office yesterday because she needed her dog's records faxed over to a groomers at that very last second because she didn't plan ahead and make sure they had all up to date records on vaccinations and such. The particular cause of concern was a kennel cough vaccination, this stuff spreads easily from one dog to the next so the groomer wasn't going to take the dog back into the place without first knowing it was up to date. We look into the records and see this dog never got vaccinated. This lady was so pissed she had the groomer call us while she was on the other line we have at the office. We tell the groomer and they could give less of a crap since the lady had already bitched them out there and we end that call. My co-worker goes back to the crazy women and tells her there is no record of vaccination. The co-worker got an earfull and then handed the phone to me. The lady rants for a while and ask if we have the breeder's record from when she first got the dog. (We didn't, but I lied and said yes). She says you see how its on there, I just say it isn't, because the vaccination is only good for a year and this dog is two years old. Another 5 minutes of this lady going on and on about knowing for a fact that the dog got vaccinated and her blaming us for never writting it in the records gets me really annoyed. I finally said there is nothing I can do either way, she says one last nasty comment, and then hangs up.
 
[quote name='anotherpoorgamer']To be honest, if I found a hair, bandaid, a bug or rat in the burger I'd ask for a refund and walk away without trying to make a scene.[/quote]

really? 'cause a number of those (the bandaid, rat, or bug specifically) could cause you to become sick or even die. if i found one of those 3 in my burger, the wheels have come off and they're gonna know it.
 
This isn't so much a "customer" story, but still felt it was worth sharing.
My summer job (I'm a college student) is doing registrations for the local school district, especially summer school registrations. Last Friday was the last day for registration. So lots of people came into our center. And apparently they've had problems in the past with irate customers, so we actually had a police officer, probably around 28 years old, come in and do security for us.

This is not a story about an irate customer. This is a story about the officer.

I knew this guy was gonna be problematic from the start. I say that because soon after he arrived we ordered pizza for lunch, paid for personally by one of my supervisors. The cop asks a coworker if he can have a slice, and my coworker responds "Yeah, you can have a slice." He then proceeds to wolf down an entire pizza. He also committed other such acts of lazyness/inconsiderateness while here, but one thing really pushed it right over the edge.
This girl comes in to register herself. She's hot, but also, she's a highschooler. So what does our borrowed cop do? He walks up to her and the following conversation happens:

Cop: "How old are you?"
Girl: "... how old do you think I am?"
Cop: "I'm hoping 18. ;) "
He then gives her his business card with his cell number written on the back.

28 year old cop. < 18 year old girl. Apparently in all the training they put police officers through, they forgot to cover statutory rape.
 
Three summers ago, I put on the short sleeve shirt, the short black tie, and the badge. I joined the Geek Squad. I was looking for excitement and adventure. I was looking to be all that I could be. All I found was very frustrating people, many buying things they did not need and a corporate IT structure that tripled repair times. To say the least I was a bit disappointed with my CIA (Counter Intelligence Agent) position. But that does not mean I did not have fun.

I remember one day we had a lady come in complaining of pop-up, lewd hijacks, and general slow operations. After taking a look at it, we explained that her computer had been infected with several different types of malware. She asked how this could happen, for that we explained that most malware comes from either online gambling sites or pornographic sites. Well with this explanation she got furious, she claimed that no one in her house did either and that we were lying. After a couple of minutes of trying to calm her down, my manager comes over and offers the lady a deal. We will clean off the software like she wanted and if we happened to run across any urls for questionable material, we will have the printer, print out a list. This seemed to have appeased her and the rest of the computer take in process was completed.

Well, we cleansed the system of the malicious software and my boss asked me to import the history and filter anything that did not reference a pornographic or gambling site (i.e. blackjack, sex, XXX, etc.) and then just send that into notepad and have the printer print the results. So after completing that, we call her home and tell her that the computer is ready for pick up. This time she brings her son down to the store to pick up the computer (I guess because she did not want to carry it) and we begin talking about the clean out. We show her how hijack this allowed us to destroy the redirects and how a combo of 'MSconfig' and spybot allowed use to halt and remove the processes running in the background causing the popups.

Well, from there she asked if we had found any proof of explicit web surfing. At this point, the son looks a little uncomfortable, but not overtly nervous. Until I pick up a stack of pages (approx. 50 pages) with urls printed in 8 point font and hand them to her. "These are the first 50 pages of URL we found, we would have printed more but the printer ran out of ink and were told not to use it for anything other then service orders." Well, let me tell you, this went over well. The son's face turned red and he turned around quietly and walked away as his mother browsed the pages. The mother then began to ask a question, starting with the word how. But, caught herself when she realized her son was no longer there. The rest of the transaction went smoothly and we put the list into a bag for her to take home.

I will always remember this lady, because she is a wonderful example of customers that open there mouths before thinking.
 
I was enjoying a quiet evening at work tonight, with all evidence pointing toward an early finish after closing.

It's 20 minutes till we lock the doors. I'm on my way to the registers after looking for a product for a customer, when I near this horrible, glass-breaking crash. I figure a full set of shelves came down- it happens once or twice a year, we overfill the candle section and it collapes. No biggie. But then I get up front- and there's a flood of glass. What happened?

A drunk old woman rammed our glass door with her power-scooter and shattered it.

Seriously. She dented her bumper. I believe my manager is still up there, waiting for the guys we called to board up the door to come.
 
[quote name='DuelLadyS']I was enjoying a quiet evening at work tonight, with all evidence pointing toward an early finish after closing.

It's 20 minutes till we lock the doors. I'm on my way to the registers after looking for a product for a customer, when I near this horrible, glass-breaking crash. I figure a full set of shelves came down- it happens once or twice a year, we overfill the candle section and it collapes. No biggie. But then I get up front- and there's a flood of glass. What happened?

A drunk old woman rammed our glass door with her power-scooter and shattered it.

Seriously. She dented her bumper. I believe my manager is still up there, waiting for the guys we called to board up the door to come.[/quote]


that's so funny, i wish someone would do that to my store that's so funny, this manager gets like so pissed at customers for little things i want to see him get all angry and start screaming :bomb: i seriously think he might kill a customer one of these days.


i have a funny story story about this manager. We accept returns but sometimes the customers like switch the tickets to make them more expensive when they returns things. Anyways this big ass black lady comes in seriously i was suprised she could climb out of bed she took up like half of our biggest aisle ( 6 - 12x12 tiles) she comes in trying to return like 20 different things, a t-shirt that we sell for around 7.99 had a 24.99 ticket i mean cmon at least make it reasonable.

So my co-worker calls up the manger and he starts explaining politely that we can only give her store credit and that it would be the actual price of the items since all the tickets are wrong. She starts babbling about how she bought them at another store and whatever. So what? You probably did buy them for 7.99 anyway's at the end she gets all upset and starts yelling and saying she'll car corporate and stuff. manager asks her to please leave and take all the clothes with her. And she turns to face him points a finger and say's " I'll run your ass over tonight you redneck."

The manager is a lot of things but he isn't a redneck he's nice when he wants to be. So he just gets her things stuffs them into a trash bag walks out the door and throws them out the door. Says now leave and make sure that you can fit thru the doors on your way out. she looks like she is about to literally kill him. It's so funny she's standing like 2 feet from her bags and like steaming. Anyways it finally got resolved when the manager went off duty and a new nicer mangager came in who is a dumbass and returned all her things for full inflated value.

i mean cmon and they wonder why our shrink is like thru the roof:shock::idea:
 
[quote name='XIII']We are sitting there ringing out customers as they stand there in line, just miniding our own business, A chinese family is standing in line waiting to purchase a game..Our TV hangs from the ceiling and plays the EBtv daily, same thing for an entire month. So there is a Chinses boy maybe 5......He is watching the Television while waiting with his father and happens to see the excerpt that we had of a Godzilla game that just happened to be in the "archives" section of the DVD. Well, as he proceeds to watch, he seems to cringe a little bit and then smiles really big as on screen Godzilla proceeds to blow up a city, This is when out of nowhere the boy says in a rather loud tone, "Oh boy, that Godzilla is so strong he really scare me" and instantly grabs onto his father's leg....for anyone who's of age you should totally understand the irony of this joke. So we bust out laughing, we actually have to pull our manager onto register because we have lost our emotions uncontrollably, just laughing histerically.....Absolutely hilarious.[/quote]

I'm not of age, but I get it lol.
 
[quote name='King_Sprout']I'm not of age, but I get it lol.[/QUOTE]

Sorry i'm retarded or not of age, but explain por favor?
 
[quote name='mickeyho13']I don't work retail, and from these stories not to excited too. I work at an Orange Julius and if they don't sign the back I usually ask for ID if i feel in the mood. Hate it when people are like its just a smoothie or we're not buying alcohol or nething... ughh just give me ur ID geez. But I love when people ask why and i tell them u didn't sign the back and then their tone changes like ohhh....

Also had another incident this one girl couldnt be more then 16 didnt sign her card and no ID so my manager asked her to sign the card right there, she was like where? and she tried signing on the black strip.... how does she even have a card?[/quote]

Don't be so hard on younger card owners, I'm 13 and I signed the back as soon as I got it. Although I should've just written check ID since I have to have my ID checked everytime. Meh.
 
[quote name='jPoD']Sorry i'm retarded or not of age, but explain por favor?[/quote]

Well basically, Godzilla was a japanese movie IIRC, and when he started destroying shit, the japanese people got scared, ran around, screamed out his name, etc. The boy isn't japanese per say, but still asian, so the dude made that aconnection and out came a funny little story.
 
[quote name='King_Sprout']Well basically, Godzilla was a japanese movie IIRC, and when he started destroying shit, the japanese people got scared, ran around, screamed out his name, etc. The boy isn't japanese per say, but still asian, so the dude made that aconnection and out came a funny little story.[/QUOTE]

I kinda figured that was it. I'm a bit slow. I got a credit card too when I was 13 :)
 
[quote name='jPoD']I kinda figured that was it. I'm a bit slow. I got a credit card too when I was 13 :)[/quote]

Kewl, I got it when I was 11, dad got bored so he connected an account to me.
 
[quote name='jPoD']Wow 11? That's a bit TOO young for one. ;)[/quote]

Not really, unlike what others my age would've done, I was very responsible, plus I pay my bills.
 
I dont deal with bills. My dad does that shit. idk if I couldve dealt with a CC at 11. 13 wasnt a problem.
 
[quote name='jPoD']I dont deal with bills. My dad does that shit. idk if I couldve dealt with a CC at 11. 13 wasnt a problem.[/quote]

You mean he pays your bills or what?

And it's not too hard, keep track of what to buy and pay for it, or the minimal fee.

Actually I've always had enough money to pay my bills at the time of purchase, so basically I only use it to show off.
 
Yeah he pays them. We go over what I spend and whatnot, I just dont take the time to go through them.
 
[quote name='io']Damn, people, I didn't get a credit card until I got my own in college :D.[/QUOTE]

Same here. Now I'm trying to pay one off so I can close it. I consider it a project.
 
[quote name='jPoD']Yeah he pays them. We go over what I spend and whatnot, I just dont take the time to go through them.[/quote]
I could probably convince my parents to start paying for stuff I buy, but meh, I'm not going to.

Btw, how old are you? And also, is it because you don't want to pay, or lack cash? What can I say, I'm bored.
 
Well I went to the theater yesterday, to see The Devil Wears Prada (I had pirated and seen everything elseb esides Superman, but my sis didn't want to see it).

It was the last movie showing, so everyone else was gone, and suddenly, the bulb burst, and the screen went blank, with only the audio.

We left waited outside, and they eventually gave everyone free tickets, but to me, a movie is more than that, so my sister is going to call and ask for our money back.

Sorry, but we're going to milk this cow dry.

Kind of a bad customer story on our part, but meh.
 
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