So I Asked Her Out......

Damn, 150 replies already. I should start posting tales of my own wild, erotic adventures, you guys would love those (if you love monster movies, demolition derbies, and any other spectacle involving large, hairy things, and scary looking monsters disguised as females).
 
[quote name='VanillaGorilla']Damn, 150 replies already. I should start posting tales of my own wild, erotic adventures, you guys would love those (if you love monster movies, demolition derbies, and any other spectacle involving large, hairy things, and scary looking monsters disguised as females).[/QUOTE]
What about lamentations on carpet envy?
 
[quote name='Paco']But what if on the very very VERY VERY super VERY small off chance that he happens to be a MANG like me and knows how to fight back, and consequently beats the living shit out of said boyfriend?[/QUOTE]
When did the OP mention Street Fighter?
 
[quote name='WhipSmartBanky']What about lamentations on carpet envy?[/quote]I hate it when they're shaved....takes away the pioneer spirit of going deep into the bush, not knowing what wild creatures lurk beneath.
 
[quote name='Eviltude']When did the OP mention Street Fighter?[/quote]

No. I never mentioned street fighter either. I mentioned a coup. GO WITH GREAT GUSTO and stand up to said boyfriend, beat the everloving crap out of him then pelvic thrust in her direction, flex your arms and go "Lose the zero get with the hero!" Another fun thing that would be amusing to add is the CAGer with the sig that says BUSSINESS UP FRONT. PARTY IN THE BACK!

THAT is what a Lumberjack would do.
 
[quote name='Paco']No. I never mentioned street fighter either. I mentioned a coup. GO WITH GREAT GUSTO and stand up to said boyfriend, beat the everloving crap out of him then pelvic thrust in her direction, flex your arms and go "Lose the zero get with the hero!" Another fun thing that would be amusing to add is the CAGer with the sig that says BUSSINESS UP FRONT. PARTY IN THE BACK!

THAT is what a Lumberjack would do.[/QUOTE]
You should join Tiph's new gamer thing.
 
[quote name='Roufuss']I want to punch the OP in the face.

Please don't ever have children.[/QUOTE]

wow to get roufuss to want to punch you in the face, you must have pissed him off pretty bad or be a really sick sick bastard.

after reading through this crap...im with the concensus....drop it and move on.
man she has a BF and doesnt even know you. i dont think she will be making that big or a tough decision to leave him for you. especially if she is happy. this is getting repetitive and boring and if you are trolling for reactions you did a good job.
 
[quote name='VanillaGorilla']I hate it when they're shaved....takes away the pioneer spirit of going deep into the bush, not knowing what wild creatures lurk beneath.[/QUOTE]

Crabs.
 
[quote name='The Don'] ever since I met her, I have stopped masturbating. I have been like this for three weeks now. I have lost all lust.[/QUOTE]

Are you saying you're in megalove-stalker mode for a girl you met three weeks ago? She blew you off man.. get some counseling and start masturbating again.
 
Ah, the weekly CAG "I'm a huge loser/stalker nutbag" thread. What I love about these threads is that everyone gives the same advice and the OP never takes it. About a week later everyone can come on here and post the collective "I told you so," and have a great laugh at the OP's expense.
 
[quote name='The Don']How have I been over the top?[/QUOTE]

Your wording sounds like you're trying too hard to sound like the longing romantic - which is why you have 9 pages of response. It's SO desperate sounding, for lack of a better word, that it would not be surprising to hear you snickering with your other teenie friends about the silly threads you have going on CAG.

Just being honest about how it sounds. Like I said, if you're really serious I'm just letting you know that you're going to get your heart broken. Being this deep emotionally at this stage in a relationship isn't normal, and you can't build a relationship. Relationships go FAR beyond emotion - the emotion should be the result, not the driver.
 
[quote name='Zenithian Legend']Seriously, this guy needs to get some balls, then smack that girl on the ass, and tell her to bake him a cake![/QUOTE]

I disagree. The road to this girl's heart is to take care of the b/f first. He needs to find out who this mysterious man is and where he works. Then go to the store and purchase two large containers of glitter...
 
I have to give props to the OP for amusing 5 other boards I go to. You are one of the biggest retards I've ever come across online and I applaud you for that.
 
[quote name='fart_bubble']I have to give props to the OP for amusing 5 other boards I go to. You are one of the biggest retards I've ever come across online and I applaud you for that.[/quote]

He posted the same thing across 6 online boards? How lame is that?
 
[quote name='2poor']He posted the same thing across 6 online boards? How lame is that?[/quote]

No no no. I linked to both threads on 5 other boards.
 
[quote name='The Don']That's what I fear. If I find that out, my heart will bleed, and I'll probably break my computer or something.[/QUOTE]

Don't break it before you update this thread!
 
lloyd.jpg


You ain't him. Give it up.
 
[quote name='Skylander7']Here's how it would've played out if I had been in the situation...

Me: "Hey, wanna go and get coffee sometime?"
Her: "As what, bf/gf or friends?"
Me: "As divorcees, it's more fun that way.. joking, I didn't look that deep into it"
Her: "Oh.. sorry, it's just I don't like jumping into things. I'm seeing somebody right now, so I'm not looking for anything serious."
Me: "As in boyfriend, part time boyfriend, or just pain in the ass?"
Her: "A little bit of all three. But we can hang out as friends."
Me: "Technicalities are a pain in the ass too."
Her: "I don't get it."
Me: "Nevermind, no worries. How about Thursday?"
Her: "That's ok."
Me: "Does it have to be coffee? Those places suck ass, it feels like a bunch of sociatal misfits who sip overpriced coffee to attain some feeling of social importance and try to fit into their peer subcultures."
Her: "I don't know if I understand."
Me: "Well... if you don't understand, than that definately rules out the bf/gf question."
Her: "That's cool, I'm not looking for anything serious right now."
Me: "Well... wanna get shitfaced instead? We can shoot BB guns at hookers at the truck stop or something."
Her: "Ok, sounds fun!"

Here's my advice.. anybody that worried about technicalities, claims to be involved, and still agrees to free overpriced coffee... is obviously more concerned with bleeding a nice guy's wallet and collecting males like baseball cards for social acceptance. Don't get sucked into the black hole of estrogen, and be outwitted by someone who lacks the integrity and loyalty to someone they're involved in at the price of free java. It can only end up with empty bank accounts and a kiss on the cheek at best.

You'll see this girl again someday in your life.. likely when she's ringing you up at the gas station as you get a six pack late at night. High school relationships only end in teen pregnancy and divorce (most of the time), and are built on the foundations of superficiality. Trust me, 5 years, 2 kids, and one divorce later.. they become the aggressor in a bar somewhere. That's when it gets really interesting :)

When you got her number, you should've said "on second thought.. no thanks.. your boyfriend put me up to it to see how you'd react. No way in hell would I date somebody like you, and coffee is gay."[/quote]

:rofl: I haven't read the entire thread yet, but this is already the best post here!
 
[quote name='The Don']The next thing I plan to do is send her flowers on sweetest day.[/QUOTE]

fuck you. You deserve to get your ass kicked, first by her boyfriend, and then by every guy here for acknowledging this 'holiday'.

Seriously, until "Steak & Blowjob Day" becomes official, I refuse to recognize "Valentine's Day: The Sequel".
 
[quote name='ITDEFX']now he needs to take her out to an arcade in a college and beat her at street fighter :p[/quote]

Hey, it worked for me! But then again I'm something the OP isn't. A MANG. I have funky fresh manly style. A mustache, a beard, a medallion, a gold ring and I have enjoyable foreigner accent. That and I tower over her height wise. So she KNOWS she's with a MANG.

I somehow doubt the OP is MANG ENOUGH to pull off what I can do though. Maybe if he gets freakishly tall, lives in mexico a year and chases chickens and then plays Unlimited Saga for fun THEN he'll never have the power required to win her heart.

I suggest Medallion Man. Get a medallion the size of a hubcap THEN ask her out again.
 
[quote name='PRMega']fuck you. You deserve to get your ass kicked, first by her boyfriend, and then by every guy here for acknowledging this 'holiday'.

Seriously, until "Steak & Blowjob Day" becomes official, I refuse to recognize "Valentine's Day: The Sequel".[/QUOTE]

That's the funniest and manliest thing i've EVER read. Props PRM.
 
[quote name='chosen1s']I disagree. The road to this girl's heart is to take care of the b/f first. He needs to find out who this mysterious man is and where he works. Then go to the store and purchase two large containers of glitter...[/quote]

Maybe... perhaps that could lead to a menage a trois. And who knows, it's very probable that the original poster is just using this girl to get closer to her boyfriend.
 
I'll say what everyone is trying to tell you. You are a pathetic excuse for a man. You are a trouble and should seek counseling, you my friend should wear a sign that says doormat. It's scary that you think like that, although its amuzing to read all the stupid crap you write. I myself feel sorry for you and hope that the nice doctor gives you the meds you need.
 
[quote name='Zenithian Legend']Maybe... perhaps that could lead to a menage a trois. And who knows, it's very probable that the original poster is just using this girl to get closer to her boyfriend.[/QUOTE]

this would make sense if you think about it...

-nerdy guy tries to steal girl who already has a bf..
-boyfriend finds out about it and gets pissed
-boyfriend tries to fight nerd
-nerd turns fight into more of a wrestling match
-boyfriend being stronger than nerd ends up on top
-girl jumps in trying to break up the fight
-thumb in girls ass = threesome

genius.
 
[quote name='Fire']instigated as a government cover-up I take it? Or is simply a generic commerical knock off to exten Valetines Day's economic impact on the economy?

Hell, it has its own wiki. Impressive, but it misses the government conspiracy I had laid out.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Sweetest_Day[/QUOTE]


that's because women and the government control the Wiki entry. In fact, I'm pretty sure the OP is a spy. The whole purpose of this thread was to promote sweetest day.

admitting to getting a girl something on Sweetest Day is the verbal equivalent of castrating yourself.

but not only is he getting A girl something, he's getting SOMEONE ELSE'S girl something...what a tard.
 
[quote name='chosen1s']So "The Don",

Tonight's the night, correct? It's Thursday and I'm expecting we will receive some sort of update this evening?[/quote]
Are you kidding? He's out getting laid, he won't be back until dawn

Oops, i mean gazing into her eyes because he is asexual now.
 
OMG this thread is hilarious...
I bet once she gets those flowers on "Sweetest Day" (WTH ? Im a chick and have never even heard of this...) he will be posting about the restraining order that has been put against him. Either that, or getting his arse kicked by the girl's boyfriend. Or even more likely, a combination of the two.
 
Reading this thread is like watching two trains on the same track slowly inch their way towards each other. I wonder what the collision will be like?
 
[quote name='Squall835']Reading this thread is like watching two trains on the same track slowly inch their way towards each other. I wonder what the collision will be like?[/quote]

You ever see the Matrix 2 tractor-trailer crash? Cept he can't fly.
 
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