The Disco Inferno wrestling thread

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The OtL main event video package was great - especially since it gave Sheamus's skin more color in black and white than it has in color. Batista's wheelchair promo was full of win. I'm really gonna miss this heel act. Hopefully he comes back sooner rather than later. Bret coming out as GM seemed kinda sudden, as did his giving up of the U.S. title off-screen to put it on the line in a Truth-Miz match. Sheamus-Henry went on forever, and was highlighted by Henry's receding hairline. Lovitz and Maryse were awesome in their skit. Lovitz is still very funny, and hasn't aged much from his prime...15 or so years ago. Women's tag was the usual deal - nothing particularly good about it.

Truth vs. Miz had me excited to see Truth in the U.S. title scene for the first time. Spider German Suplex off the second rope from Truth ruled. This was a pretty hot match thanks to the fast pace and constant near falls for each guy. Glad to see Truth win the gold. It's definitely the biggest win of his career, although I'm quite surprised to see him win the title before Morrison. I don't expect WWE to get behind him like TNA did when he first got the NWA World title, but I'm still excited to see someone new as U.S. champ, and this opens the door for Miz to go beyond the U.S. title.

Jon Lovitz came out and was awesome. Get this guy a gig on something on broadcast TV again. Surely, he can have some kind of role on Community. Then the talent show started and things went downhill. Khali singing was amusing, and Jillian getting booted got her out of the way...then Lovitz took FOR-EVER to find a plant in the crowd. After a few weeks, he got a guy in a Santino shirt who could remove his eye, then Ted came out with THE REAL VIRGIL, who got hit with a nerve chop thingy, bumped for it, but most importantly, had an awesome big white star on his red shirt. Dynasty vs. Regal/Kozlov was a fun little match that showcased the Harts well. Then the Usos and Snuka's daughter came out to destroy them in a neat-looking scene with all three of them on the ropes at once. It's a shame neither of these teams is over, because this is easily going to be the deadest feud for the unified tag titles yet. Cole threatening to Danielson was awesome. It's a shame he didn't work in a knock about him having no money after saying he'd take him for everything he's got. Show's White Collar commercial was the funniest thing on Raw by far - dude's got some awesome comedic timing and it's never faded.

The main event triple threat was definitely the best match on the show. Not an all-time great triple threat or anything, but everything they did in hit was well-done, and it had an awesome finish with Cena getting a codebreaker, then Jericho getting speared and pinned. Awesome-looking end to the show with all four guys in the WWE Title match at the PPV staring at one another down the ramp.

Screens -
















Quotes -
Cole - 24 hours after an extremely controversal Over the Limit, it’s Michael Cole and Jerry Lawler at ringside!
Batista - I said it! LAST NIGHT, BATISTA SAID TWO WORDS THAT I NEVER THOUGHT WOULD COME OUTTA MY MOUTH. I QUIT! BUT I SAID IT BECAUSE MY LIFE WAS BEING THREATENED! DO YOU HEAR WHAT I’M SAYING? MY LIFE WAS BEING THREATENED! So because of Cena’s malicious actions, I’m contemplating filing suit against JOHN CENA!! Also against the WWE AND ALSO AGAINST EVERY FAN IN THE WWE UNIVERSE FOR SUPPORTING WHAT HAPPENED TO ME! THAT’S NOT HOW A TITLE MATCH SHOULD BE - THE DUCT TAPE, GETTING THROWN OFF OF CARS! I CAN STOOP TO JOHN LENA, JOHN CENA’S LOW LEVEL, BUT I BELIEVE IN HONOR! Now, I’M OUT FOR WEEKS, MONTHS, MAYBE YEARS! (fans cheer wildly) Cheer now, CUZ I’LL BE BACK HEALTHIER THAN EVER AND ONE WAY OR ANOTHER, JOHN CENA’S GONNA GIVE A REMATCH. I’M ENTITLED TO A REMATCH!
Roberts - THE NEW GM OF MONDAY NIGHT RAW, BRET THE HITMAN HART!
Bret - There’s a new sheriff in town, what I say goes! On June 20th, there’s gonna be a new PPV concept called fatal four way. If Cena’s still champion, he’s gonna take on three different competitors who will be decided tonight.
Batista - WHAT DO YOU MEAN TONIGHT?!
Bret - You want a match with Cena? This is your chance to achieve it, by qualifying for the fatal four way right now.
Batista - I’M SITTING HERE IN A WHEEL CHAIR - I’M HURT!
Bret - I KNOW YOU’RE HURT, BUT SO’S YOUR OPPONENT - RANDY ORTON!
Batista - WHAT IS YOUR MALFUNCTION? I AM HURT, I CAN’T COMPETE AND YOU CAN’T MAKE ME!
Bret - You want a match with Cena? TAKE THIS, OR FORFEIT!
Batista - YOU CAN’T DO THAT! YOU DO THAT AND I’LL QUIT! I’LL LEAVE THIS BUSINESS. I MEAN IT!
Bret - Well, by a forfeit, qualifying by a forfeit, RANDY ORTON!
Batista - ARE YOU KIDDING ME!? WHAT!? OW! HEY, I’M NOT KIDDING. GET BACK HERE! I’M SERIOUS! YOU ALL ARE NOTHING WITHOUT ME. WWE WILL GO BANKRUPT WITHOUT ME IN A WEEK. YOU ALL PAY TO SEE ME. YOU THINK I WON’T QUIT!? I QUIT!!!!
King - What just happened here?
Roberts - LET’S HEAR IT FOR BATISTA! (fans boo)
Batista - I DON’T LIKE YOU EITHER! YOU’LL MISS ME WHEN I’M GONE! (to refs re: his wheelchair) COME ON, PUSH!
Cole - Why’s Bret the GM with his history with Vince?
King - You got a hidden talent?
Cole - No.
Lovitz - Hello…
Maryse - Hello, Mr. Jon Lovitz. I’m glad you’re here - I have really hot photos that would win your superstar search easy.
Lovitz - Give me a sneak peak… OR NOT, Miss Maryse. I’m not just here to plug my new comedy club - THE JON LOVITZ COMEDY CLUB. I’ve also developed a new submission move - I’ve been teaching it to Santino.
Cole - Maryse had a funny conversation with Jon Levitz, Lovitz, tonight.
Miz - R-Truth, you’re always asking what’s up and I have an answer for it. I’M TAKING WHAT NEVER SHOULD HAVE BEEN TAKEN FROM ME IN THE FIRST PLACE. I’M WALKING OUT THE U.S. CHAMPION BECAUSE I’M THE MIZ AND I’M AWEEEESOMMMEEE!
King - Miz faced the entire Hart family last week.
Cole - Just like Mr. McMahon at WrestleMania!
Cole - You’re watching the longest-running epishodic show in history!
Crowd - AWE-SOME! AWE-SOME!
Cena - I’m done playing nice! THE CENATION IS HERE!
King - Loving that Lovitz!
Cole - That’s… THE TICKET!
King - Just say no to crack, Jon, PULL THOSE PANTS UP!
Lovitz - TONIGHT, I’M MORE POWER THAN ANYONE. MORE POWER THAN THE ANNOUNCERS, THE REFEREE, EVEN MR. MCMAHON!
Lovitz - I’M LOOKING FOR TALENT. I WANT JERRY LAWLER-LIKE CHARISMA!
King - PICK SOMEONE, PLEASE!
Joe - MY NAME IS JOE!
Lovitz - What’s your talent?
Joe - I CAN PULL MY EYE OUT OF MY SKULL!
Lovitz - I’d like to see you pull something else out, but it’s PG!
King - That turned unfunny.
Cole - IT’S TED DIBIASE AND THE REAL VIRGIL!
Lovitz - He must be good - HE’S GOT A BELT!
Cole - It’s the Million Dollar Title - NOT A BELT!
Ted - I want the eyeball. How much? How much for your eyeball?
Cole - What is going on!?
Ted - If I can’t buy it, then I’m gonna beat you up and then I’ll take it!
Lovitz - WHO IS THIS GUY?
Joe - I can’t do it… (Santino comes out)
Santino - Mr. DiBiaske, if you don’t leave this cyclops alone, I’m going to apply Jon Lovitz’s move to Ver-geel!
King - KIDD GETS HIM RIGHT IN THE TEMPLE! OR THE MOUTH!
Cole - If Daniel Bryan doesn’t apologize to me in the ring tomorrow, I’ll sue him for everything he’s worth!
Lawler - Cena took just as much damage as Batista last night!
Lawler - Maybe I should correct myself - he didn’t get an attitude adjustment off a car through the floor!
Cole - He nearly got hit by a car though!
 
For everyone looking to make a drinking game out of tonight's Raw, here it is: drink every time Batista spits while talking during his promo. Get. Bret. A. Towel.
 
Yikes, I made it through Raw in about 15 minutes on DVR. Not a great sign.

By the way, was it just me, or was that the most charisma Bret has shown since coming back?
 
I've really fallen out of watching WWE lately, but I have a few thoughts on what I did see:
1) If Michael Cole is playing "heel announcer" with Bret Hart, he's not hamfisting it as much as he is with Danielson, because I didn't notice it at all. Meanwhile, whenever I would watch NXT, I was being bludgeoned with a verbal sledgehammer of subtlety when Cole would shit-talk Danielson. It never made sense to me that an announcer was playing the role of a heel with regard to *one* wrestler only, and I don't buy, after watching last night, that he's being more equitable about it.

2) I haven't watched with any real intent (or at all) in weeks, but putting a Mark Henry v Seamus match on tv as if the outcome is in doubt (when it's a PPV title match) insults my intelligence. It shows that the writers don't think we care about wrestling, or don't want us to care about wrestling.

3) Batista is really solid right now - he's a great character, showing the proper degrees of denial, delusion, and entitlement after losing three matches (?) straight to Cena since WM. Triple H never tried to wrestle as this kind of heel, which stresses how egocentric he is, to the detriment of the company. I didn't believe y'all when you were talking about how great Batista was in his role, but I'll admit I was wrong. Dang.

4) If TNA booked the X-division title to be treated like Miz's US title over the past 4 months, you would have crucified Vince Russo eleven times over. Don't get me wrong, Russo is an awful writer and deserves your scorn, but the silence over the hot potato of the title from not being defended to an old man who doesn't wrestle to a hotshot, not-promoted title match with zero build, given away for free on TV? Wade Keller would have written five essays by now condemning TNA's short-sightedness. This goes for y'all as well as a lot of the internet columnists who pan TNA. TNA has a boatload of shortcomings for sure, but WWE's shortsightedness gets a pass from y'all. That ain't right.
 
I keep reading that, KR. But they put a lot of attention on him last night for him to just up and leave. Seems counterintuitive to the way pro wrestling businesses typically operate. You job someone on the way out, sure, and they've done that - but you also don't let them steal the spotlight (literally) the first ten minutes of the last show he's supposed to be on.

I'd truly be surprised if that's how he's going out. Someone may think he's "taking a year off" or something; but let's not delude ourselves, if he does go he won't return. He's pushing 40, isn't he?
 
[quote name='mykevermin']
4) If TNA booked the X-division title to be treated like Miz's US title over the past 4 months, you would have crucified Vince Russo eleven times over. Don't get me wrong, Russo is an awful writer and deserves your scorn, but the silence over the hot potato of the title from not being defended to an old man who doesn't wrestle to a hotshot, not-promoted title match with zero build, given away for free on TV? Wade Keller would have written five essays by now condemning TNA's short-sightedness. This goes for y'all as well as a lot of the internet columnists who pan TNA. TNA has a boatload of shortcomings for sure, but WWE's shortsightedness gets a pass from y'all. That ain't right.[/QUOTE]

The thing is though that the US Title /= Raw. It looks generic and not pleasing. Raw needs the intercontinental back. That's what most fans have associated Raw with.

Plus, at the time, Raw was too top heavy. Kinda like now. Only other choices were Swagger, Kofi, and MVP really. Now it's Ted Jr, Evan Bourne, and...I'm honestly having trouble thinking who else could be US champ. John Morrison feud I guess.

Raw just has too many main eventers who would look kinda silly with the US Title. Miz and Jericho are obviously going to be teamed up, Edge and Orton are too grown for it, Celtic would be a huge step back...

So it was kinda like the only logical thing to do at that time was just let Miz hold onto it and make it seem like he was too busy to defend it. Plus, us fans did get one wish that we've been waiting for...THE REBIRTH OF THE TAG TEAMS!!!!!

It's looking brighter each week



*And the whole fatal 4 way setup was sham. Orton got in "just because". Celtic faced the kool aid man. And for some reason....Cena had to be in the 3 way match to be in the 4 way match. No point of him being in it at all. Would have made sense to just let it be Jericho vs Edge. And even then, you kinda had to know that Edge would win...
 
Rebirth of the tag teams? Having only 2 tag teams is what WWE does best.

Don't fret, though. They'll be shipped back to FCW, released, or split up in 3 months.
 
[quote name='diddy310']Yeah, it was great when ECW was still on. You would get a dark match, 2 maybe 3 Superstars matches, usually 3 for ECW, then Smackdown.

Huge difference in the amount of wrestling you get to see versus a live Raw.[/QUOTE]

But, being taped, there's also a bit of downtime for commercials which means you get drunken whores behind you screaming about there's not enough wrestling and they paid to see action and then they hit you in the back of the head with a beer when Batista loses and screams at Chuck Polumbo because they think the storylines are real and then get thrown out of the building for swearing in front of all the little kids.

Or, at least, that's my experience. So worth the $60.
 
[quote name='HydroX']Rebirth of the tag teams? Having only 2 tag teams is what WWE does best.

Don't fret, though. They'll be shipped back to FCW, released, or split up in 3 months.[/QUOTE]

:rofl:
 
I don't know about the Rebirth of the Tag Teams - the division seems limited to whatever two teams are feuding for the title.

Yes, Smackdown has the Dudebusters, Hawkins/Archer, and I guess Gallows/guy in mask - but the champions don't appear on Smackdown, so they have no purpose.

Part of me would love to see the brand extension end just because it would create more fresh matchups. Yes, the main event scene would get clogged up - but they could keep the IC and US titles and have the IC become important again.
 
[quote name='mykevermin']But they put a lot of attention on him last night for him to just up and leave. Seems counterintuitive to the way pro wrestling businesses typically operate.[/QUOTE]

I agree, but occasionally you get them letting a guy have a sendoff that works with the character and puts the spotlight on them, whether they are faces (Flair, Michaels) or heels (last night, Jericho's last appearance before his hiatus).

I'm sure he'll be back eventually, but if he really is splitting for a while I'm worried he'll be a face by default when he returns just because he'll get the "YAY SOMEONE IS BACK" reaction like Edge did.


Definitely want to see the Raven/Vandenberg shoot...I'll track that down later.
 
[quote name='strongpimphand']The thing is though that the US Title /= Raw. It looks generic and not pleasing. Raw needs the intercontinental back. That's what most fans have associated Raw with.[/QUOTE]
This confuses me.
 
F4WOnline.com is reporting that WWE made the decision to have CM Punk lose to Rey Mysterio at Sunday's PPV because they wanted to wrap up the angle as Mysterio is expected to take some time off after tomorrow's Smackdown taping. At this point, it's unknown whether or not Mysterio is taking an extended hiatus from WWE to have knee surgery performed, or if he's just taking a short break to spend some time with his family and heel up any nagging injuries.
Click to expand...

...Then why not have Punk win anyways?
 
[quote name='Mr. Beef']...Then why not have Punk win anyways?[/QUOTE]

You know, if that's the case, I actually agree with it. Bottom line, this feud was going to end with Punk getting his head shaved... it was inevitable. If Rey was taking time off, they had to wrap it up. As much as I wanted to see Rey in SES (which, frankly, they should've pulled the trigger on a while ago), if he's taking a leave of absence, this was the right call. Plus, even while losing, I'm sure Punk'll find a way to spin this and get him even more heat. A hiatus would've killed this feud, and Punk is now available to move on and feud with someone else.

I'm just hoping it isn't Kane. Please god, don't let it be Kane.
 
[quote name='OnyxPrimal']Hogan sues over cereal commercial

http://www.digitaljournal.com/article/292358

In his defense, I thought it was a blatant rip off of him. Article includes video of said commercial.[/QUOTE]

Nah, the wrestler in the commercial had hair. If they hadn't used 'Hulk Boulder' they may have gotten away with it. He is being a little bit dramatic with the whole "degrading depictions" jazz.
 
[quote name='niceguyshawne']Nah, the wrestler in the commercial had hair. If they hadn't used 'Hulk Boulder' they may have gotten away with it. He is being a little bit dramatic with the whole "degrading depictions" jazz.[/QUOTE]

That's just lawyer speak for "Ka-ching!"
 
[quote name='Mr. Beef']...Then why not have Punk win anyways?[/QUOTE]

I would have liked that idea. Have Punk win, and then just have something like "Rey won't be associated with something he doesn't believe in, so he isn't even going to show up." Depending on how long they expect Rey gone, they could even have Punk keep mentioning him and calling him out. Like the Jericho versus Malenko fued from WCW. Punk is definitely charismatic enough to make a memorable segment on par with Jericho In Washington DC.
 
- It looks like Christian will be teaming with Hornswoggle some in his new feud with Dolph Ziggler. Christian & Hornswoggle vs. Dolph and Chavo Guerrero is on the books for upcoming SmackDown events.
Click to expand...

.....pray for Christian...
 
Damn this topic moves fast.. I just got done reading the last one and there's already 300 posts in the new one. I'm finally caught up. That Danielson clip was so pure greatness. I'm going to assume that whenever Danielson/Punk/Bourne do something worthy of being talked about you guys will mention it.. so I don't have to watch WWE for no reason. :]
 
[quote name='mykevermin']Who are the tag champs?[/QUOTE]

With the rebirth of the tag teams among us, I can see how you would get lost in the shuffle of all the pure tag teams on the roster.

:whee:
 
Shit, at least Christian was main eventing in TNA and carried the world strap. He signs back with Vince gets put on the C show, busts his ass on tv and house shows and now what? He teams with Hornswaggle LOL. On the Hogan note, it does look a lot like him and he's gotta make some of that cheese back that Linda took.
 
I like R-Truth as the US Champion and he should have title for a few months, but man does he ever need a new finishing move. The Lie Detector is so bad. He wiffs on it 90% of the time and looks like he just flies over his opponent's head.
 
I like that he lands the exact same way whether he hits the thing or not. Also, I don't think Truth is going to hold the title very long - it's probably just a quick run to get the title on Ted Jr.
 
I don't care what anyone says...Michael Cole looks like the type of man who would sue someone for "everything they got"

His most convincing role ever

"I did things last night I shouldn't have done" - but this happened last week....what did you do last night Bryan????

MY GOODNESS DID COLE JUST BITCH SLAP HIM?!?!?!? THE FUNNIEST SHIT I'VE SEEN ALL DAY.....

Dude is still boring...but Cole and Miz just made this entertaining
 
Heath Slater sounds retarded. fuck that shit...dude needs to stay away from the mic!
 
I'm guessing Cole forgot when he got kidnapped by Heidenreich when he talked about the Danielson stomping being his "most traumatic experience."

EDIT: Love the look on The Miz pre-punch.
bryanmiz.jpg
 
[quote name='diddy310']the champions don't appear on Smackdown, so they have no purpose.
[/QUOTE]

Yes, they do. They can appear on both brands.

I'm happy about the tag team ranks beefing up. Here's who we have, I believe:

Raw:

The Hart Dynasty
Jericho & Miz
William Regal & Vladimir Kozlov
New guys who attacked the Harts
John Morrison & R-Truth (on hold, at the very least, with Morrison's injury/Truth's title win)

We did have The Colons, but Carlito had to be an idiot and get released. Primo is pretty much the 2nd most worthless guy on the roster, behind Tyler Reks. Speaking of Reks, when I first saw the new tag team, I thought he had cloned himself till I got a closer look.

Smackdown:

The Dude Busters
Curt Hawkins & Vance Archer
Straight Edge Society
MVP & JTG

Plus I think we'll be getting Hardy & Justin Gabriel soon. That's a good amount of teams, with only one set of belts.

Thoughts on Raw and NXT:

Raw- Michael Cole using "advocated" improperly about 50 times was annoying. Bret as the new GM was great, as was the backstage interaction between my all time favorite and current favorite wrestlers, Bret and Edge respectively. Jericho's one of my favorites as well.

The U.S. title match was out of nowhere. I expected it to be decided at Fatal 4-Way. R-Truth being in it surprised me as well, but then I realized that Raw has not one single other midcarder who could have filled the spot, except maybe Mark Henry. I get the feeling that Truth has inherited a push planned for John Morrison. I like Truth, but he really should have won the title when he challenged Shelton Benjamin at Cyber Sunday a couple years ago.

I wonder how Orton will factor into the PPV with his injury. I expect Cena will make Sheamus tap to win the match. The 3 way main event was pretty good.

NXT- I really, really hope they're building to a Danielson vs. Cole match in which Cole gets destroyed and taps like a motherfucker. Slater being eliminated was no surprise. I really hope all 3 remaining contestants get jobs on the main roster. Barrett to Raw as a singles guy and associate of Jericho; Gabriel as Matt Hardy's tag partner; and Otunga on Raw to do... something.

Are they even going to put anything in NXT's time slot? I have no idea if there will be a season 2.

One other thing- no one will care, but the other night, I wrote down what I feel should be the progression of PPV title defenses for Jack Swagger. I have not read any SD spoilers, mind you. And also note that Swagger has been booked worse than Sheamus... Sheamus never lost once by pinfall or submission during his title reign (or whole time on Raw) till he lost his title. Swagger has lost literally half his matches.

Here's how I feel it should go:

Fatal 4-Way: Swagger vs. The Big Show vs. Kane (did have Christian till his Ziggler feud started) vs. CM Punk
Money in the Bank: Swagger vs. Christian (playing on their ECW title feud and Christian's actions when he was drafted)
SummerSlam: Swagger vs. The Undertaker (Swagger wins by dubious means, or loses by DQ)
Night of Champions: loses to Undertaker; rematch at Hell in a Cell

Thus ends my rambling for now.
 
I know they CAN appear, I'm just saying that they won't since they are feuding with a Raw team (well, presumably the Uso brothers will be a Raw team). Hopefully the rumor of making the tag title match a Fatal 4 Way is true so they can get a Smackdown team in there.


Also, I think Cole was saying Bret abdicated the title on Raw.
 
[quote name='diddy310']Also, I think Cole was saying Bret abdicated the title on Raw.[/QUOTE]

That would make sense, but I swear I heard "advocated" on numerous occasions. After all, it is Michael Cole...

Myke laughs at or makes jokes about half my wrestling thread posts.
 
[quote name='TheRock88']Punk's new look (SD spoilers)

ff2suu.jpg
[/QUOTE]


I assume
the mask is temporary. Perhaps they're setting up a Mask versus Mask match somewhere down the road? Though Rey Jr. obviously wouldn't lose, so the match would be pointless. :whistle2:k

Despite how I wanted WWE to draw out Rey-Punk until SummerSlam, a bald CM Punk works in terms of the character. Does anyone else remember when Bryan Danielson was bald and had the crazy wizard beard? That look could work wonders for Punk's cult leader character. (Though I do prefer Punk with hair.) :whistle2:#
 
[quote name='Chase']I assume
the mask is temporary. Perhaps they're setting up a Mask versus Mask match somewhere down the road? Though Rey Jr. obviously wouldn't lose, so the match would be pointless. :whistle2:k

Despite how I wanted WWE to draw out Rey-Punk until SummerSlam, a bald CM Punk works in terms of the character. Does anyone else remember when Bryan Danielson was bald and had the crazy wizard beard? That look could work wonders for Punk's cult leader character. (Though I do prefer Punk with hair.) :whistle2:#[/QUOTE]

Or it could be his idea of carrying over the feud for an extra week or two like he did when he came out to Jeff Hardy's music complete with make-up despite JH not being with the company any more and still trashed Hardy for another week or two after that.
 
[quote name='TheRock88']Punk's new look (SD spoilers)

ff2suu.jpg
[/QUOTE]

He looks like he's a sex slave and Serena is his master...HORRIBLE LOOK!
 
Regarding the SD spoiler...
I think it looks pretty awesome. Not as goofy as Kurt Angle's awesome toupee from back in the day but still a fun way to try and heel out of losing an important match.
 
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