Nice recap of THE GAME, THE ASS-KICKER HHH beating Brock, and a huge highlight reel for Dolph's win. Nothing on Swagger. Loved Big E's Ricardo promo for Dolph, who came out like Sonny Crockett in season 3. Dolph's promo was thankfully cut short by Swagger and HIS FOUNDING FATHER Zeb, since his voice was shot. I loved Zeb demanding a title shot, getting rejected and calmly leaving while swearing vengeance. Alberto in jeans and a denim shirt with a suit coat over it was odd-looking. He said words and ended with TERMINATOR 2'S CATCHPHRASE. Holy hell. I loved Jericho interrupting Dolph after he said he was tired of this. Jericho saying it's time to stop talking AND START ROCKING ruled. Tag champs are up next against the PTPs. Tag champs won in like a minute or so. I liked the Shield preventing a celebration and bringing up the Taker deal and saying they pick their spots to fight. Kane being pissed and setting off pyro ruled.
Great new WM vid featured some wacky Cena faces. Santino's out to get an ass-kicking from Barrett. Barrett got the win with the bull hammer. The WWE TAKES OVER NY vid re-aired because WWE IS AN AMAZING COMPANY AND IT IS IMPORTANT THAT EVERYONE KNOW THAT. Booker T's gonna get a call from Taz for wearing black and orange. Teddy stirring the shit up between Booker, Sheamus, and Orton was amusing. They basically just did the same goofiness from Raw, but with Booker making a 2 on 1 handicap match against Show...the heel... The Bellas teamed with Tamina, and stretching with each other in a very Billy and Chuck manner. Funkadactcyls are teaming with Kaitlyn. Loved Kaitlyn spearing the daylights out of Tamina, then a Bella. After a chain of wacky things, A HAIR PULL WON THE MATCH. That was something. They hyped up the HOF special in full on Xbox Live and THE WWE APP.
HHH came out with a cast on his left arm and did his whole intro - with the short hair, he came off like a middle-aged guy trying to relive his 20s. So weird to hear JBL put HHH over like the God of wrestling. HHH started doing an '02 promo with a gravelly voice about how great he is before 3MB came out. Oh, this won't end well. At least they aren't the tag champs, or six guys. Love Heath having to put HHH as the biggest, baddest dog there is in WWE before getting beaten up by him. This was bizarre because they basically did the Shield setup on HHH, and that set up...the Shield interacting with 3MB. Between this and the Main Event, they really should just only be doing stuff with major guys. At least HHH is in there to get beaten up. Sweet, 3MB is getting destroyed for stealing the Shield's gimmick. Excellent. Kane and Bryan made the save for HHH, further setting up Shield-Tag champs for the gold. Or copper. I loved the guy in the bright red Cena shirt holding his hand out to the Shield and getting rejected by all of them. Show and Booker met, where Show was angry about Booker being BIASED TOWARDS HIM...um, should've done a retake on that. Show's handicap match is up next.
Subway's got a buy one footlong sub, get one free deal tomorrow - sweet! They did a hype vid for this that truncated the Orton-Sheamus Raw match down to a few seconds with no chants showed Show...stomping on a chair, or Orton, or something in slow-mo. I guess ribs since those are taped up. Show targeted the ribs, and Cole talked about Booker being in the HOF going to his head. JBL ripped on Cole for citing Teddy's opinion as fact. LOLed at Cole saying Show's spear is like getting hit by A SCHOOL BUS! Show walked out after their finishers and for some reason, NEITHER OF THE TWO BABYFACES WENT AFTER HIM TO FORCE HIM TO FIGHT. So I guess they didn't really want the fight they each begged for, got, AND HAD THE NUMBER'S ADVANTAGE IN. Mick's new DVD trailer is outstanding.
Sheamus and Orton had a hilariously expositional and awkward conversation immediately after the break. Henry ambushed him and tossed him into a brightly-clothed table. Awesome. This led to a nothing Kofi-Cesaro match that saw neither guy get an intro. I loved Cole just going "yeah, he yodels now". This yodeling gimmick is absolute death, and the losses are just shoveling dirt on him. TREMENDOUS European uppercut counter to Kofi jumping up. Audible ROH chant here. Flash kick KO'd Cesaro and gave Kofi a win. If this was on Raw, and pushed in a way that meant something, it might have come off as upward momentum for Kofi. And maybe if they hadn't just done this stop and start push for him like six months ago with Miz. Cena-Henry-Ryback deal's gonna get recapped next. It'll be the first time RYBACK TURNING HEEL AND DESTROYING THE WWE CHAMPION is brought up on the show. Raw hype vid involves Cena-Ryback - well that's good. The video somehow made Cena-Henry seem long and somewhat epic. Josh read the Rock's tweet, and sounded ridiculous doing the hashtags.
FANDANGO came out and they showed fans dancing along with him in the crowd, and then Cole explained what Fandangoing is. Dolph came out with the gold in reverse so he could wiggle his ass around with it...I'm glad JBL buried that. I loved JBL putting over Fandango's win as the reason for Fandangoing becoming a thing - it does make the Jericho match seem far more meaningful. For some ungodly reason, Cole brought up Dolph winning the title before, which Josh thankfully squashed. Dolph did a cool kind of corkscrew fameasser to Jericho before the break. JBL being rendered speechless by Josh saying that Dolph's head gives him more leverage for the side headlock was amazing. Josh referencing Amanda Bynes was also the most timely reference on WWE TV in ages. I liked Dolph winning via the help of two people, but not really needing it since only a punch set up the loss. Zig Zag and a Big Ending laid Jericho out. FANDANGOING occurred while Fandango came in and danced, then beat up Jericho more. He dropped the big leg, did the booty wiggle. Loved the guy with the Big Eagle belt dancing while Fandango said his name. Good-ish show overall.