The Official Simpsons Quotes Thread

[quote name='The Crotch']"Kwijibo: a big, dumb, balding North American ape... with no chin."
"And a short temper!"[/QUOTE]
Isn't it spelled "kwYjibo"?

Duffman is thrusting in the direction of the problem!
 
We're talking softball
From Maine to San Diego
Softball
Mattingly and Canseco
Ken Griffey's grotesquely swollen jaw
Steve Sax and his run in with the law
We're talking Homer...
Ozzie and the Straw
 
Tonights episode was awesome. I laughed the whole way through. My favorite lines were

From a Hitler cut out in the library: "Before I was a Nazi leader, I was a Nazi reader"

Milhouse: "Bringing a weapon to school has turned out to be awesome"

Lenny: I'm not a villian, I'm a transvestite
Bart: Let your God sort it out (throws Lenny into a power transformer)
 
Barney: My name is Barney, and I am an alcoholic.

Lisa: Barney this is a girl scouts meeting.

Barney: Is it really, or do you girls refuse to admit you have a problem?

Don't cry for me, I'm already dead.
 
My Homer is not a communist. He may be a liar, a pig, an idiot, a communist, but he is not a porn star.
 
Mr. Burns: "I think I'll donate a million dollars to charity. When pigs fly!"
::pig flies by window::
Smithers: "Will you be donating that million dollars now, sir?"
Mr. Burns: "Eh, I'd rather not."
 
I put two quotes in here and you managed to copy them both in one post. :lol:

[quote name='strayfoxx']Barney: My name is Barney, and I am an alcoholic.

Lisa: Barney this is a girl scouts meeting.

Barney: Is it really, or do you girls refuse to admit you have a problem?

Don't cry for me, I'm already dead.[/quote]
 
Nah Nah Nah Nah Nah Nah Nah Nah Leader!
Nah Nah Nah Nah Nah Nah Nah Nah Leader!
Leader!
Batman!
I mean Leader!!!

I love the leader!
 
*Homer singing*

'Shavin my shoulderss......shaving it all, shavin it all off"

*homer in bathtub*

*bart hits him in the back with a wooden chair and chair breaks*

Homer: "ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh*pain*"
 
[quote name='gorgonzola238']Nah Nah Nah Nah Nah Nah Nah Nah Leader!
Nah Nah Nah Nah Nah Nah Nah Nah Leader!
Leader!
Batman!
I mean Leader!!!

I love the leader![/QUOTE]

Ooh, gotta add on to this one:

The leader is good
The leader is great
We surrender our will
As of this date
 
Quote from Nelson in the episode where Bart becomes his friend and Nelson see's Bart hugging a gift that he gave him:

"Ha Ha, I touched your heart!"
 
Fish Slaughtering Plant in Japan
bart:"Knife a goes in, guts a come out,..."
*grabs fish*

magical fish: "If you spare my life, I will grant you 3 wis....ahhhhhhh"bart:"Knife a goes in , guts comes out."
 
Hello. I'm Leonard Nimoy. The following tale of alien encounters is true. And by true, I mean false. It's all lies. But they're entertaining lies. And in the end, isn't that the real truth? The answer is: No.
 
Let's take a peek a the killing floor...Don't let the name throw you. It's not really a floor; it's more of a steel grating that allows material to sluice through so it can be collected and exported!
 
(german accent)german trainer:"cats back for everybody"

gymnast girl:"but I had a dog!"

(german accent)german trainer:"YOU HAVE CAT NOW"
 
"I'll take him to the guillotine factory. That'll be the perfect place to shoot him!"
 
You call that a knife? Now this, this is a knife!

But... Thats a spoon.

Ah, I see you've played kniffy-spoony before.
 
"...from the pockets of a pocketfox, no longer in existence."

"saying your buddy's name out loud is a security risk, I better just pair you two together"
 
It's going to be bigger than 10 superbowls!!! not to oversell it or anything
 
Homer: There's a crayon.....in my brain?
(Points to stomach)

Doctor: (Redirects Homer hand to actually point to his head)

Homer: In my brain?/



fucking classic. The to me is the single funniest thing that ever happend in The Simpsons.
 
[quote name='elprincipe']Call Mr. Plow
That's my name
That name again is
Mr. Plow[/quote]
ill follow that up with

"senor plow no es macho
es solamente un borracho"
 
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