The "WrestleMania Stinks" Wrestling Thread

Status
Not open for further replies.
NXT did a Clash of the Champions special this week. It's longer than a normal show. I have not watched it yet, but have it in my Hulu queue. I know it used to be uploaded by fan on youtube, but since the Hulu deal those get removed right away.
 
[quote name='mykevermin']Is there a place to watch NXT other than Hulu Plus? I'd love to follow it, I enjoyed the hell out of OVW's weekly show when I lived in Kentucky.[/QUOTE]

I gave a quick google check and couldn't really find anywhere to watch it except Hulu, but if you are willing to deal with ads and 7.99 then I recommend it because NXT it is quite entertaining.
 
[quote name='mykevermin']Thanks, mtx. That Cesaro-Adrian Neville match was really excellent to watch.[/QUOTE]


My favorite part of that NXT Clash of the Champions episode.

1pxqg1.jpg

Dude is over with that crowd. Love his gimmick.

NXT should replace SmackDown as the B show and- Uh- Superstars? Main Event? That other show as the C show. Crazy that NXT is their D/E/F show, especially when they're trying to build up names.
 
I can see not wanting to promote NXT - they want to use the program to build guys, and promoting it could expose guys too soon, or in the wrong gimmick, etc. It gives them (as a hypothetical, because it's not likely to happen) the opportunity to reintroduce El Generico in that gimmick in WWE but still have him wrestle as (uh, whatever his gimmick is) currently.

For instance, WWE brought back Rey Mysterio in his mask, but when I saw him a few times in HWA right after he signed with WWE, he worked without a mask.

They're in a bit of a bind for sure. It also doesn't make sense to use this show to build guys when they have plenty of time to do so on their 7 or so other hours of weekly programming, yet fail to do so.

I wish they had a more robust product, but moving this one up the food chain isn't the answer to their problems.
 
Good points. :)

Totally forgot that NXT is/was FCW, their developmental territory.

Still wish they'd make it easier to access. I think most of us here have an interest to see what happens to Hero, Black, and Generico and want to support them somehow.
 
Raw was quite a hit or miss show, but featured some damn fine action on it at points.

Full thoughts -
Raw, yes, RAW is opening with a Ricardo Rodriguez vs. Big E vs. Zeb match. Ricardo's dressed in Rico's gear. Winner's guy gets to pick the sticks for the title match at ER. Zeb's clapping and looks of glee as Big E mangles Ricardo are amazing. Could do without Cole burying Zeb for wearing a fishing vest. YAY, ZEB GOT IN SOME SHOTS. Looked good too. And then things got wacky with Zeb feigning an injury to prevent being murdered by Big E before Ricardo used the bucket on him. And then everyone ran in because triple threats are always no DQ when they need to do wacky bullshit. AJ in a hot black and pink outfit came in to prevent Zeb from winning, and Ricardo won with a schoolboy. This reminded me of Lil Boogey vs. Hornswoggle, minus JBL being super-hilarious on commentary here. Cena and Ryback are being FORCED to team tonight against the Shield and his injury was BIG-TIME NEWS ON WWE.COM, so in other words, it wasn't a bit deal anywhere, and Cena's going to celebrate world wish day, because WWE LOVES MAKE A WISH!

John Cena's WORLD WISH DAY, which sounds like either the made-up Love Day from the Simpsons, or that thing from the Star Wars Holiday Special. Also, WWE HAD 1.5 BILLION VIEWS ON YOUTUBE! They showed heart-wrenching footage of a kid born with half a heart, who WWE is devoting global time to so they can exploit. They showed Cena being nice - that's great, then showed a bunch of shots of the NEW WWE TITLE, AVAILABLE FOR PURCHASE NOW ON WWE.COM. Also, John Cena has granted more wishes than anyone else. Wonderful thing for the kids, but it comes off as a bit sickening because how overboard they're going it. The kids get to be honorary WWE superstars, so I guess they get to play Wii all night. This feels like filler, and it's only 8:20. Then they made sure to talk about ALL OF THE GREAT THINGS WWE does. Lordy.

Orton's facing Cody. Good lord that was once a big deal. MORE WORLD WISH DAY stuff. WWE loves Make a Wish. WWE is privileged to be part of World Wish Day. Cody got a jobber intro. They did some moves. More moves. The crowd chanted for an RKO, so he did a dropkick. Loved JBL referencing the Garvin stomp by name. Then JBL talked about Dusty in polka dots and Cole said he was handcuffed by Saphire. HIS CAREER, he made sure to note. HOT DAMN - SOMETHING EXCITING - Disaster kick on the apron. JBL comparing Cody now to Orton as a rookie is hilarious. JBL had several orgasms over a superplex from Orton. This got great with an RKO Fever sign, the RKO being gone for, and Cody countering it into his finish. AMAZING spot there. Tremendous finish with an RKO off the Disaster kick. Striker asked Orton if he's haunted by what happened at WM. Please punt this man. And Orton's NEVER FELT MORE EXTREME, which means he RKOs Cody again. Nikki reminded Brie of their reality show on E...wouldn't she know it's on E and what it's called? One of them, or maybe both, are facing some form of Funkadactyl next.

It's Brie, the one without tats, facing someone. Nikki's tat is showing. They re-aired last week's promo on the show. YAY, Naomi's in the match! The Funkadactyls do the splits now to show off their asses. Twin Magic won, and Naomi didn't bother objecting. Instead, Cameron did, and Naomi got the win. Then they had a fight, according to Cole. The term fight being used here is an insult to pillow fights. YAY, Shield promo next about Taker's beating. They came out and had a great take no shit look on their faces. Someone wearing a BWO shirt in 2013. They fucked up a slideshow by not showing the Rock. It did lead to a great recap of the Taker-Ambrose match's post-match beating. 3MB is out. I guess they didn't get their hand-written apology. It seems so wrong for The Shield to be involved with a geek squad, even if it's to kill them. Tag champs stopped the beating on 3MB...and then kicked their asses. Weird to see Bryan in NO gear and doing the YES bit. Ryback looked at Cena's taped up foot, which Cena noted was just hurt, not injured. And he's better on one foot than Ryback is on two. Why Ryback didn't do SOMETHING here, I have no idea.

Now they're shilling Domino's - in 20-30 minutes, the heart attack victim gets pizza delivered. BOY, I BET IT TAKES LESS TIME. Dolph is out for an unannounced champ vs. champ match. They showed Kofi winning to remind everyone that he's a champ. According to JBL, Kofi just became a dad - good for him. Cesaro faces Kofi to get his rematch, and ensure it'll be good, and watched by no one. They replayed a super-stiff kick from Kofi. They talked about AJ possibly being the divas title. Another guy would buy a Norelco razor and go fuck himself. I loved JBL being amazed that Cole was checking tweets instead of using the WWE APP. They talked about the triple threat earlier being an example of how risky the match is for Dolph...THAT COMEDY BULLSHIT WAS SERIOUSLY SUPPOSED TO BUILD A WORLD TITLE MATCH?! The damned Twitter crawl blocked AJ's ass. Kofi hit his kick and would've won if it wasn't for AJ putting his foot on the ropes. He then dove on Dolph and Big E, who tried to revive him. Finish got fucked up a bit, as Kofi missed a splash, but he dove too far out for the "Dolph rolled out of the way" story to be told properly. Big Ending to Kofi sets up Big E-Kofi for the title, and AJ being divas champ then was set up nicely too. Dolph used Henry's THAT'S WHAT WE DO bit. Oh, and Alberto might pick his match stip.

WWE HAS MORE FACEBOOK FANS THAN EVERY MLB AND NBA PLAYER! They did a wacky skit with AJ, Kaitlyn, and Nattie. Cody, or perhaps A MYSTERY MAN, gave her a gold-studded hat. Brock killing 3MB was shown, as was the HHH-Heyman deal. Ryback met with Brickie, who wanted to change the main event to a 6-man tag. He turned it down because Ryback rules. Raw has made Cole hungry, and the fans got the pizza. So Domino's will take forever to get your pizza to you, and may deliver it to the wrong people. Ryder's out to face Swagger, and remind people of Zeb's loss. LOLed at JBL calling Ryder a Belieber. Swagger killed Ryder, but not before JBL called him the seven figure Broski. Unless that refers to his bank account, it's a pretty stupid nickname. Tremendous spinning headscissors into the powerbomb, leading to the Patriot lock. Zeb has more of a tan than Swagger. Love him cheap-shotting Ryder afterwards. GO ZEB! Henry's walking backstage with a rope. Maybe he wants a match with Sheamus in a PRIDE rules match.

They showed an awkward shot of Striker for eons, oh, and Ryback left. Henry got cheered, and told the fans he didn't need their approval. Also, he's going to face two people in a tug of war - one being Tensai. JBL used this to talk about having a bullrope match with his pal, Eddie Guerrero. Henry won - I wonder how many points he got in the Team Challenge Series for this. Brodus is his next foe. Henry won, and Cole made sure to note PROPER TUG OF WAR RULES. If someone's arm goes below the knee, it's a DQ. I'm astonished that they didn't have a DQ just to fuck with things a bit. Sheamus came out, and after HENRY BEAT TWO MEN, he wanted to face him. Between this wacky shit reminding me of the TCS and JBL referencing Battle of the Network Stars, this felt like an ESPN Classic homage. Oh, and Sheamus won by letting go and kicking Henry. Brave babyface. IT'S WORLD WISH DAY, EVERYONE. Brickie and the tag champs had a wacky meeting. Kane wants revenge for Taker's beating. Vickie gave Brad a secret whisper. Yay, wacky intrigue!

Rock's tweet from last week was shown, and they hyped up Pain and Gain. Very un-PG film. Cena met with Brad and called him Braden Walker. That was amusing. Cena, SUPERCENA in fact, will be teaming with the tag champs tonight. Ricardo's out and they're showing Cesaro, #1 contender to the US Title, in the background as a jobber here against Alberto. Kinda surprised they haven't put Alberto's new logo on his gear instead of the falcon. Cesaro YODELED on the app, and now wears a beret and shades. Oh lordy. Cole is reading Webster's description of yodeling. The commentary tonight has been something. Alberto's ass was exposed during an armbar takedown. A BACKBREAKER ON THE RING APRON was a fucking app spot. He also yodeled on it during the break. Loved Cesaro's close-up left and right mounted punches. Then he did the same thing with standing Euro uppercuts.

By making the yodeling deal off-air, they've helped him seem like a bigger deal tonight. Sick snap German suplex with a bridge from Alberto. Big OLE OLE OLE chant. Loved the dive into the uppercut spot, and them bringing back Cesaro being super-disciplined. Kneeling superkick of megadeath hit perfectly for 2. Armbar was countered into a cradle, then back into the armbar for the win. Really awesome match, and much fresher than the other two good matches on the show. After talking about Alberto winning in ladder matches, Alberto made his triple threat match one. 6-Man tag is official.

Khali and Fandango are out for a dance-off. Summer Rae's back and a guy in a Harley shirt is Fandangoing. Khali was asked questions and answered them in Khalese. Then he danced and JBL plugged DDP Yoga. Summer Rae was named officially, and showed off her ass nicely. Fandango hit the Russian legsweep and legdrop combo. Shield's beating was shown from SD, and the face team came out. Kane faces Ambrose on SD, so I guess Ambrose gets a make-up win.

Ambrose's selling of a suplex was incredible - moreso since it led to an uppercut/slap combo. I loved Rollins running wild with gut shots in the corner ala Brock. Bryan did the best-looking surfboard in ages, leading to some VINTAGE KAIENTAI with a basement dropkick from Kane. I love everything involving Ambrose and Bryan in the match together, and also that Bryan is fairly seamlessly back in a main event role. LOLed at Cena's C'MON DANIEL BRYAN! Tremendous effortless Samoan drop to Bryan from Reigns. Cena keeps saying C'MON DANIEL BRYAN, and it gets better every time. Snap DDT ala Tiger Mask from Ambrose on the floor to Kane. In an odd move, neither Reigns or Rollins, who were right near him, tried to stop him. Reigns beat Cena after his ankle, or achilles, or whatever it is for that minute, went out on him. Having Ryback wear a wacky big leather jacket ala Goldberg in WWE doesn't do him many favors for that comparison, but is a cool look. Good match and a fine show if you skip all the filler. Except Khali/Fandango - that was at least amusing filler.

Screens -







http://www.imagebam.com/gallery/1xuagnu8fxiaqk7l5vf8g9dzwzywejyf
 
Pac vs. Cesaro on NXT was fantastic.

And not to harp on you like others, Jay, but what's with the screens you choose to show? Do we really need to see a screenshot of Matt Striker waiting to interview someone? Or a deceiving screenshot that would imply Lesnar was actually at the show?
 
I miss Fandango's old dancer. She always had a scowling look to other wrestlers that I think was perfect for a heel valet. Probably just a short term deal to teach him how to dance.
 
At least they used a real wrestler as the dancer, could easily form an angle at some point, rather than someone that wouldn't work well. Also from NXT i could see Summer Rae handling the heel role with Fandango.
 
Watched the last few eps of NXT. Good shit, especially the last one with the champ matches. Enough to the point where I'm considering driving up to Orlando to catch it sometime. May be worth it to see Ambrose/Rollins work a match.
 
[quote name='MSUHitman']WWE 13 is $29.99 at Target through Saturday.[/QUOTE]

Thanks for the heads up. Will pick up a copy.
 
The Lonely Road of Faith Desire montage is without a doubt my favorite video package that WWE has ever created. Amazing what happens when they not only acknowledge but embrace their past.
 
Scott Hall revealed that he has dropped 30 pounds in nine weeks. Here is what he wrote on Twitter:

“Lost 30 in 9 weeks. From 298 lbs to 268 lbs with limited exercise. Can’t wait to train hard with Dally…”
 
Good to hear he's making progress...need to get back on the DDP Yoga routine as soon as I'm done with school next week.
 
[quote name='ced']The Lonely Road of Faith Desire montage is without a doubt my favorite video package that WWE has ever created. Amazing what happens when they not only acknowledge but embrace their past.[/QUOTE]

I like the video, I really can't stand the music though.

Speaking of brilliant montages though...

www.youtube.com/watch?v=w1QOsW2o7LA
 
Last edited by a moderator:
[quote name='HeroToTheMasses']Scott Hall revealed that he has dropped 30 pounds in nine weeks. Here is what he wrote on Twitter:

“Lost 30 in 9 weeks. From 298 lbs to 268 lbs with limited exercise. Can’t wait to train hard with Dally…”[/QUOTE]


Feel-good story of the year. DDP is working some magic to change the lives of Jake Roberts and Scott Hall. Something many people have undoubtedly tried before and failed. Incredible.
 
Picked up Fire Pro Wrestling Returns for PS2 for $5 at GameStop last night. Can't wait to give it a go. I haven't used my PS2 in years.
 
[quote name='BigPopov']I miss Fandango's old dancer. She always had a scowling look to other wrestlers that I think was perfect for a heel valet. Probably just a short term deal to teach him how to dance.[/QUOTE]

321345_325875560875174_1625418802_n.jpg
 
[quote name='HydroX']
321345_325875560875174_1625418802_n.jpg
[/QUOTE]


It would be amazing if they made Fandango a serial killer.

Vignettes would be him teaching dance, wooing women, and taking them out on dates. A month later, Cole reads a report about one of Fandango's dancers being found dead.
While not spoken, a news photo from the scene shows a distinct red rose. Fandango looks miserable upon hearing the news. Takes a break. He finds comfort from one of his other students. They fall in love. Then two months later, Cole reads a report about her being found dead in a lake. In the corner of a news photo is a distinct red rose. Fandango is heartbroken again, and finds comfort from, say, Kaitlyn. Kaitlyn's close friend Cody Rhodes tries to be supportive about her decision. They show multiple dates between The Dang Man and Kaitlyn.

Kaitlyn has to reschedule a third date with Dang-a-dang due to prior obligations with Cody. A shot from across a parking lot shows a masked man assaulting Cody as he attempts to get into his car. Kaitlyn tries to call Cody but it rings until voicemail. The next show, they show The Dangger comforting Kaitlyn. Cody is in the hospital. Fandangdang says he has a surprise for Kaitlyn. They show Dang Dang bringing her up into his penthouse. Red roses everywhere in the background. Candles lit. Romantic. She is awed. Fandango spouts that pretentious Shakespeare quote. You know which one. The next show, Kaitlyn is scheduled to defend her title against Generic Female WWE Employee #4 (trademark pending), but is nowhere to be found. The next match, Fandango comes out, wins his match. Lawler tries to get a word from Fandango, asking if he knows why Kaitlyn didn't wrestle her match. Fandango says he has no idea, and enters a limo with another woman. The next show, Cody looks visibly worn, and is asking around for Kaitlyn. Just before his match, he answers his phone and hears a quick, distressed "Cody, help" from someone that is possibly Kaitlyn.

Cody confronts Fandango, who is with another woman, and asks if he has seen Kaitlyn, since he was the last to see her. Fandango furrows his brow, and says, "Shame for her that our love never truly rose to greatness." Dude is just a pretentious dick. Cody asks if Fandango's new ladyfriend knows what she's getting into. New Ladyfriend says, "Of course, he's my brother, after all." During Cody's match, the lights go off, and when they come back, there is a rose in the centermost area of the ring. Cody looks puzzled, and gets hit with the finisher of Generic WWE Wrestler #5 (trademark pending) and falls to a pin. Cody, now angry, confronts The Dangmaster, and says that he knows where she is. Dadjango smirks, and Cody hits him. WWE officials separate the two, and Generic WWE Commissioner #8 (trademark pending) says they have no choice but to indefinitely suspend Cody.

Fandango is shown in his locker room just laughing a storm, as the camera pans to Kaitlyn's hands tied and hanging from a meathook in a freezer as Fandango slams shut the door. A week later, because we are suspending our disbelief, a random maintenance person stumbles upon Kaitlyn in the freezer, and Fandango stumbles upon him stumbling upon his dark secret. Random maintenance person escapes and tells Cody because this is wrasslin. Cody rushes to the area, opens the freezer door, and there is nothing there but a distinct red rose. Cody tries to get into the arena but WWE officials stop him. Fandango walks past the scene, smiling. During Fandango's match, the lights go off, and when they come back the Titantron screen shows Cody, smiling. Cody lays it all on the table, and accuses Fandango of kidnapping Kaitlyn, and doing god knows what to her. He says, "I usually don't believe in 'an eye for an eye,' but you have given me no other choice." The camera cuts to Fandango's sister tied up and gagged. Cody says that next week, Fandango brings Kaitlyn to Raw and shows that she is alive and well, or he does something from where there is no return.

The following week, Cody is wrasslin his match, and Fandango appears on the entrance ramp with Kaitlyn restrained to an extent. Cody sees this and attempts to reach her, but Cody's opponent hits him with a tope con hilo. Fandango disappears, and Cody is enraged, beats the shit outta his opponent, and gets DQ-ed. During Fandango's match, Cody appears on the entrance ramp with Fandango Sister, and as Dang Dang tries to run towards them, his opponent hits him with a tope con hilo. Fandango is angry and gets himself DQ-ed. Later in the show, we see both dudes looking for each other. They see each other across the hall, and, just before they get into a brawl, wrasslers and officials pull them away from each other. Generic WWE Commissioner #8 (trademark pending) appears and says, "Next week, we are settling this nonsense."

The following week, they promote a contract signing between Fandango and Cody Rhodes. Words are traded. Before Fandango signs, he brings out a new contract. Generic WWE Commissioner #8 (trademark pending) reads it over, and says that Cody should sign the original contract. Fandango says that the only way he will free Kaitlyn is if Cody agrees to the new contract. A Hell In A Cell match with a twist. Cody is still showing signs of wear from the earlier attack from Fandango. Cody is tentative. The twist is that Kaitlyn and Fandango Sister will be locked in cages on the ramp, and that only the winner of the Hell In A Cell match will get the keys to unlock both. Cody grabs a mic and says he will end Dangdang's reign of terror and free his friend. Cody signs and is about to assault Dangoman when Generic WWE Commissioner #8 (trademark pending) steps in between them. As he restrains Cody, Fandango strikes Cody with a chair, and walks away laughing.

During the PPV, as Fandango walks out towards the ring, entering by the cages. He grips his sister's hand in an act of unity and sexually taunts Kaitlyn. Cody enters and flips off Fandango's sister. He promises Kaitlyn that he'll free her while giving her a fist bump of solidarity. Match proceeds. Near the end of the match, Cody finds a ladder under the ring, and sets it up in the middle of the ring. He climbs to the top, while Fandango is hurt on the floor, and reveals his second discovery, bolt cutters. He opens the middle of the cell, and before he can climb through the top, Fandango speeds up the ladder, and, somehow, they both make their way to the top of the cage. Fans are buzzing. They trade strikes, and both try to climb down the cage towards the timekeeper, who is holding the keys to the cages. They trade strikes on the side of the cell. They both knock the other's head against the side. Fandango eyepokes Cody but Cody grabs Fandango and they both go crashing through the commentary table. "Holy shit" chants. Both seem lifeless until Cody rolls his arm over Fandango. Three count. Crowd erupts. Cody grabs the keys from the timekeeper and runs toward the cages. Cody again flips off Fandango Sister, and throws away her key He opens Kaitlyn's cage. Kaitlyn gives him a hug, and, as Cody lifts his hand for a celebratory fist bump, Kaitlyn pulls him in for smooch. Show ends.

I have spent way too much of my time posting, editing, posting, and re-editing this Fandango "fanfic." As a grown ass man, I am ashamed. Excuse me.

(I would totally watch this, tho.)
 
Last edited by a moderator:
[quote name='Chase']It would be amazing if they made Fandango a serial killer.

Vignettes would be him teaching dance, wooing women, and taking them out on dates. A month later, Cole reads a report about one of Fandango's dancers being found dead.
While not spoken, a news photo from the scene shows a distinct red rose. Fandango looks miserable upon hearing the news. Takes a break. He finds comfort from one of his other students. They fall in love. Then two months later, Cole reads a report about her being found dead in a lake. In the corner of a news photo is a distinct red rose. Fandango is heartbroken again, and finds comfort from, say, Kaitlyn. Kaitlyn's close friend Cody Rhodes tries to be supportive about her decision. They show multiple dates between The Dang Man and Kaitlyn.

Kaitlyn has to reschedule a third date with Dang-a-dang due to prior obligations with Cody. A shot from across a parking lot shows a masked man assaulting Cody as he attempts to get into his car. Kaitlyn tries to call Cody but it rings until voicemail. The next show, they show The Dangger comforting Kaitlyn. Cody is in the hospital. Fandangdang says he has a surprise for Kaitlyn. They show Dang Dang bringing her up into his penthouse. Red roses everywhere in the background. Candles lit. Romantic. She is awed. Fandango spouts that pretentious Shakespeare quote. You know which one. The next show, Kaitlyn is scheduled to defend her title against Generic Female WWE Employee #4 (trademark pending), but is nowhere to be found. The next match, Fandango comes out, wins his match. Lawler tries to get a word from Fandango, asking if he knows why Kaitlyn didn't wrestle her match. Fandango says he has no idea, and enters a limo with another woman. The next show, Cody looks visibly worn, and is asking around for Kaitlyn. Just before his match, he answers his phone and hears a quick, distressed "Cody, help" from someone that is possibly Kaitlyn.

Cody confronts Fandango, who is with another woman, and asks if he has seen Kaitlyn, since he was the last to see her. Fandango furrows his brow, and says, "Shame for her that our love never truly rose to greatness." Dude is just a pretentious dick. Cody asks if Fandango's new ladyfriend knows what she's getting into. New Ladyfriend says, "Of course, he's my brother, after all." During Cody's match, the lights go off, and when they come back, there is a rose in the centermost area of the ring. Cody looks puzzled, and gets hit with the finisher of Generic WWE Wrestler #5 (trademark pending) and falls to a pin. Cody, now angry, confronts The Dangmaster, and says that he knows where she is. Dadjango smirks, and Cody hits him. WWE officials separate the two, and Generic WWE Commissioner #8 (trademark pending) says they have no choice but to indefinitely suspend Cody.

Fandango is shown in his locker room just laughing a storm, as the camera pans to Kaitlyn's hands tied and hanging from a meathook in a freezer as Fandango slams shut the door. A week later, because we are suspending our disbelief, a random maintenance person stumbles upon Kaitlyn in the freezer, and Fandango stumbles upon him stumbling upon his dark secret. Random maintenance person escapes and tells Cody because this is wrasslin. Cody rushes to the area, opens the freezer door, and there is nothing there but a distinct red rose. Cody tries to get into the arena but WWE officials stop him. Fandango walks past the scene, smiling. During Fandango's match, the lights go off, and when they come back the Titantron screen shows Cody, smiling. Cody lays it all on the table, and accuses Fandango of kidnapping Kaitlyn, and doing god knows what to her. He says, "I usually don't believe in 'an eye for an eye,' but you have given me no other choice." The camera cuts to Fandango's sister tied up and gagged. Cody says that next week, Fandango brings Kaitlyn to Raw and shows that she is alive and well, or he does something from where there is no return.

The following week, Cody is wrasslin his match, and Fandango appears on the entrance ramp with Kaitlyn restrained to an extent. Cody sees this and attempts to reach her, but Cody's opponent hits him with a tope con hilo. Fandango disappears, and Cody is enraged, beats the shit outta his opponent, and gets DQ-ed. During Fandango's match, Cody appears on the entrance ramp with Fandango Sister, and as Dang Dang tries to run towards them, his opponent hits him with a tope con hilo. Fandango is angry and gets himself DQ-ed. Later in the show, we see both dudes looking for each other. They see each other across the hall, and, just before they get into a brawl, wrasslers and officials pull them away from each other. Generic WWE Commissioner #8 (trademark pending) appears and says, "Next week, we are settling this nonsense."

The following week, they promote a contract signing between Fandango and Cody Rhodes. Words are traded. Before Fandango signs, he brings out a new contract. Generic WWE Commissioner #8 (trademark pending) reads it over, and says that Cody should sign the original contract. Fandango says that the only way he will free Kaitlyn is if Cody agrees to the new contract. A Hell In A Cell match with a twist. Cody is still showing signs of wear from the earlier attack from Fandango. Cody is tentative. The twist is that Kaitlyn and Fandango Sister will be locked in cages on the ramp, and that only the winner of the Hell In A Cell match will get the keys to unlock both. Cody grabs a mic and says he will end Dangdang's reign of terror and free his friend. Cody signs and is about to assault Dangoman when Generic WWE Commissioner #8 (trademark pending) steps in between them. As he restrains Cody, Fandango strikes Cody with a chair, and walks away laughing.

During the PPV, as Fandango walks out towards the ring, entering by the cages. He grips his sister's hand in an act of unity and sexually taunts Kaitlyn. Cody enters and flips off Fandango's sister. He promises Kaitlyn that he'll free her while giving her a fist bump of solidarity. Match proceeds. Near the end of the match, Cody finds a ladder under the ring, and sets it up in the middle of the ring. He climbs to the top, while Fandango is hurt on the floor, and reveals his second discovery, bolt cutters. He opens the middle of the cell, and before he can climb through the top, Fandango speeds up the ladder, and, somehow, they both make their way to the top of the cage. Fans are buzzing. They trade strikes, and both try to climb down the cage towards the timekeeper, who is holding the keys to the cages. They trade strikes on the side of the cell. They both knock the other's head against the side. Fandango eyepokes Cody but Cody grabs Fandango and they both go crashing through the commentary table. "Holy shit" chants. Both seem lifeless until Cody rolls his arm over Fandango. Three count. Crowd erupts. Cody grabs the keys from the timekeeper and runs toward the cages. Cody again flips off Fandango Sister, and throws away her key He opens Kaitlyn's cage. Kaitlyn gives him a hug, and, as Cody lifts his hand for a celebratory fist bump, Kaitlyn pulls him in for smooch. Show ends.

I have spent way too much of my time posting, editing, posting, and re-editing this Fandango "fanfic." As a grown ass man, I am ashamed. Excuse me.

(I would totally watch this, tho.)[/QUOTE]

Is uh...

Is there something you want to tell us, man?
 
[quote name='bhk']Does this mean we now get the Fandango Fanfiction wrestling thread?[/QUOTE]

That's Faaaaaaaaannnn Daaaaaaaaaaannnnn Gooooooooooo Faaaaaaaaannnnn Fiiiiiiiiiiic-tiiiiiiiiiiiiioooooonnnnn.
 
[quote name='mitch079']That's Faaaaaaaaannnn Daaaaaaaaaaannnnn Gooooooooooo Faaaaaaaaannnnn Fiiiiiiiiiiic-tiiiiiiiiiiiiioooooonnnnn.[/QUOTE]

No, no. You have to BREATHE the As...
 
[quote name='ced']I don't understand the context, but I'm sure it's equally absurd even if I did.[/QUOTE]


Reminds me of American Psycho for some reason.
 
Smackdown Overview:

Bryan/Ryback: It's a PPV quality match up on free TV. Daniel Bryan helped make Ryback legit as Ryback actually sold quite a bit. Definitely worth checking out. Then you can stop watching.
 
Status
Not open for further replies.
bread's done
Back
Top