The Zack Ryder Wrestling Topic

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All heels should have the benefit of Jericho's commentary. Hell, he even did his best to put Kofi over at the same time while still building up Big Show as unstoppable.
 
[quote name='JaytheGamefan']Good lord was that a horrid show. Piven added nothing, the nonstop movie shilling made me want to see it less, and Dr. Ken's act was way too hit or miss. There were no really good matches, and the handicap match somehow buried Legacy even deeper, as HHH did the big fake WOW THAT SURE DID HURT (wink wink) promo, then buried Batista and Flair, and then came off like a dick when he talked to Michaels. What am I supposed to like about this guy that makes him a face again?

The main event saw Cena beat Miz yet again - so I guess they've officially given up on Miz and he'll be sent to either SD or ECW after this. Can't blame him for this, he worked hard, gave the best promos of his career, and was just unable to get over as a major deal because of how poorly they booked him. The show-closing deal was certainly memorable due to Dr. Ken hitting his head hard on the floor, but nothing aside from that and Mark Henry appearing in a little green hat was all that memorable. WWE came off as so out of touch with this decade with the whole "Charo" thing - her biggest fame was DECADES AGO and the most recent thing she's done was about a decade ago being a B-level person on the fucking Hollywood Squares.

Show-Kofi was fine, and I liked that they didn't have Kofi get killed here - he was actually competitive at points AND got a near-fall. The finish was a good way to save face for him and have Show not lose before the PPV. The post-match deal with Show and Jericho with Jericho's crossing his arms smugly ruled, as did his commentary.

Quotes -
Miz - Piven, are you having fun with your little pimp? So you’re enjoying making a mockery of this show?
Piven - We’re having a good time.
Miz - Like you, I’m an acclaimed TV star as well.
Piven - I’m sorry, you slayed Dr. Ken. Is it lame-iz?
Miz - THE MIZ!
Piven - Well, we’re actors, and we’re promoting the Goods. Before you got here, you were on a reality show and got drunk with adult beverages and fell asleep in a hot tub. I’m looking into your eyes and I call tell you 1,000% that you don’t have THE GOODS!
Cena - Doc, thanks for the scrip - the rash has cleared up nice. This rematch could happen - last week, I beat him in 2 minutes. The WWE Universe sees that the Miz isn’t really all that good. On top of that, he’s got a face for radio. He’s probably looking at us right now… it’s pathetic, isn’t it. In the age of downloading movies on your cell phone and baking a turkey in a half-hour, YOU HAVE TO MAKE THIS INTERESTING! Years from now, when cars fly and cats and dogs speak English, they will remember that Jeremy Piven, on Raw, DELIVERED THE GOODS!
Piven - If you lose, you’ll be banned from SummerFEST!
Cena - Summerslam is what you mean.
Piven - And Summerfest, whatever that is! AND YOU’LL BE BANNED FROM THE STAPLES CENTER! And YOU’RE BANNED FROM WWE RAW FOR ALL OF ETERNITY!
King - Sometimes I think this size difference is overrated - the whales are in danger, but the ants are doing just fine!
Cole - LAST WEEK’S COLOSSAL CONFRONTATION WAS EVERYWHERE! ESPN…ENTERTAINMENT SHOWS…EVEN ON YOUTUBE!
Piven - Forget about being called the Fat Show on Youtube - you’re just puffy. Husky.
Dr. Ken - Ladies, get in my Mercedes!
Cole - SMART, SEXY, AND POWERFUL - THE WWE DIVAS ARE IN ACTION NEXT!
Cole - Piven stars in the Goods - Live Hard, Dell Hard!
King - DIVA TAG ACTION!
Cole - SMART, SEXY, AND POWERFUL!
King - I’ve got a good catchphrase - a diva a day keeps the doctor away.
Cole - Sounds like you want to sew your wild oats.
King - My oats have turned sour.
King - You know the look a diva gives you when they want you?
Cole -W HAT!? NO!?
King - Me either - that’s why I wanted to know what it looked like if I got it.
King - I hope Jillian doesn’t have a busted lip - that would affuct her singing.
King - If there’s any one man who can beat two, it’s HHH.
King - I understand that DiBiase and Rhodes have been preparing, literally, for this match all week!
Cole - VINTAGE HIGH KNEE BY HHH!
(after taking both of Legacy’s finishers)HHH - OWWWW! All right, that hurt… That did not go as I planned…you know, ah! I don’t get this. I mean, Is it just that these guys are that good…(fans boo) Maybe they’re too much for me. I used to be good at this gang warfare stuff, I beat up everyone. Maybe I should start another group. Or bring one back… (fans go crazy) MAYBE I BRING BACK EVOLUTION! (fans cheer and boo) Nah, just as I’m thinking about it, that won’t work - Randy’s a jerk, Batista’s hurt all the time, and Flair’s signing autographs at the VFW (fans boo) How about I make just one phone call…Maybe I make ONE PHONE CALL and If you’re not down with that, then I’ve got two words for ya!
King - One…PHONE CALL!
Piven - You’ve had bad luck with the Horngobbler, right?
Cole - Chavo’s had a bad month - he’s 0 and 4 against Hornswoggle.
Cole - THAT’S THE BIGGEST LEPRECAUN I’VE EVER SEEN!
King - Imagine finding a pot of gold at the end of his rainbow? IMAGINE HOW BIG IT WOULD BE!
Cole - Markswoggle - the World’s Strongest Leprechaun!
(to Ken and Piven)Orton - If I could kick Vince McMahon in the skull, WHAT MAKES YOU THINK THAT I WOULD HESITATE TO DO THE SAME THING AGAINST YOU!
Cole - Did you get tyour WWE Super Big Gulp cup yet?
King - Yeah, I got Kelly Kelly on the front!
Cole - I GOT CENA!
King - Good for you…
Jericho - THE BIG SHOW IS A DESTROYER! LOOK AT THE SIZE OF THIS MAN! He just DDTd his foot!
(on the phone)HHH - You’re what!? I didn’t think you did jobs!
Cole - Next week, Raw’s in Calgary, and It will be hosted by…SGT. SLAUGHTER!
Cole - CENA! VINTAGE RUNNING SHOULDER!
Cole - Bye bye, Miz!
(after Cena tosses Dr. Ken over the top and his head sickly hit’s the floorCole - CENA JUST TOSSED THE GOODS ALL OVER ORTON’S ENTOURAGE!
[/QUOTE]
Oh shit...that's where the Charro stuff came from!!!! If you didn't type that, I wouldn't have known
 
2 questions:

How noticeable were Piven's hairplugs on live HD?

Did he leave halfway through the show due to a ridiculous medical condition?
 
[quote name='neocisco']2 questions:

How noticeable were Piven's hairplugs on live HD?

Did he leave halfway through the show due to a ridiculous medical condition?[/QUOTE]

Wow. What did he ever do to you?
 
Hopefully there is an HBK swerve where he returns and he turns on HHH.

I actually like the HHH "ouch" promo as as it made him look more human in a loss than in quite a while. I was expecting either some foreign object to play a role to his defeat, which didn't happen, or outside interference, which again didn't happen. Quite frankly, HHH wasn't protected at all other than the fact he took two straight finishers from Rhodes and DiBiase.

His "crap that hurt!" promo was also relatively low key compared to all of his regular promos but lead to the predictable outcome of DX coming back. What it lead to was far more interesting in HBK hanging up on HHH. It really makes me wonder what they're going to do and I can honestly see them doing a slow burn build to HBK/HHH ala Punk/Hardy.
 
[quote name='JJSP']Slaughter's hosting RAW? Hooray for more movie shilling - GI Joe's out soon.[/QUOTE]

Yeah but at least Sgt. Slaughter is relevant to the WWE product, unlike Shaq and all these other dudes I've never heard of because I don't follow movies or mainstream culture. Seriously, if they want to continue this guest host nonsense, GET THE fuck ING ROCK TO DO IT
 
Slaughter hasn't been relevant to the WWE product since the 90s. If all the guest hosts were as good as Shaq or even Seth Green (yes, he came across as a bit corny but he fit his role perfectly) this concept wouldn't be so damn insulting to wrestling fans.
 
[quote name='mykevermin']Wow. What did he ever do to you?[/QUOTE]

Nothing, of course. Guy just rubs me the wrong way and seems like a particularly higher level of self-important prick, even by Hollywood standards. Further explanation in the spoiler.
When he bailed on a Broadway play sometime in the last year due to "mercury poisoning" it just smacked of a prima donna who decided he didn't want to honor his commitment and made up an excuse to weasel out of it like a pussy.
Plus, anyone who wears an ascot in public deserves to be ridiculed (the exception being Thurston Howell III).
 
Those ECW ads are very cool, unfortunately they didn't start airing them until right before or after Swagger/Bourne were traded to Raw
 
[quote name='Genocidal']:lol: Some people are speculating that HHH's phone call was to X-Pac.[/QUOTE]

Maybe they're bringing back X-Factor :D
 
[quote name='Blackout']Maybe they're bringing back X-Factor :D[/QUOTE]
It's almost back to school season - Olive Garden won't give Justin Credible the days off to go wrestle. :whistle2:#
 
Stuff from the newest Figure 4 Weekly -
The AAA animated movie is due out on October 9th and Alberto Mar said it will be a great success because it has a theme everyone can relate to, good vs. evil. Deal with that every day on the freeways. He said there were many twists and turns in the movie that will surprise the public, but in the end they would all tie together and make sense. In other words, it's guaranteed to be better than Impact.
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UFC Undisputed, which continues to do tremendous business, will be heading to the Nintendo Wii soon. Hopefully that doesn't result in any deaths.
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Shelton met with Tiffany and asked if she'd gotten his text about wanting to be on the Abraham Washington show. I call bullshit. Who could possibly request this?
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Lashley, whose gimmick is the he's trying to do pro-wrestling and MMA at the same time, came out with a baseball bat.
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They had a video package about Jesse Neal's training, and in the middle of it they just stopped the tape and Tenay said they had to go backstage to cover this. It was Scott Steiner and Booker T beating up Lashley and Foley. OK then. They said Lashley was out cold. Yes, the MMA fighter, not the mid-40s guy with the bad knees.
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I wish ECW was an actual show instead of just a promotional tool for Raw/Smackdown. I hate when they show all those recap clips on any of the shows.
 
Spoiler for SummerSlam's Smackdown title match (following tonight's Smackdown taping)...

(C) Jeff Hardy will be facing CM Punk in a TLC Match.
 
Jeff's first single TLC match and CM Punk's first TLC match.. this should be a show stealer

While I realize that HBK will very likely not show up until Summerslam, I really hope that they bring back a DX vs. Slaughter angle for Raw.
 
The ECW/SD taping was pretty lame. :\ Then again, aside from a Raw house show at MSG (even that was more entertaining), I've only ever been to PPVs, so perhaps my expectations were higher than they should've been.

The dark main event at the end of the show was especially pathetic. Setting up the cage took longer than the match itself, which MAYBE lasted about ten seconds.
 
Aside from Abraham Washington ECW's been a solid show for quite some time. I attribute it to the Raw effect, wherein the people who generally screw things up (read: Vince) only care about Raw, so the other shows are more or less unaffected. Which is why Smackdown has almost always been the "wrestling" show.

The only downside (an upside for some) of ECW is it's pretty much where talent ends up when they're not ready for primetime but past FCW. I wouldn't be surprised to see Ryder and Sheamus off ECW by the end of the year.
 
- Apparently Vince McMahon was seen laughing uncontrollably backstage during some of Dr. Ken's skits on RAW this week. McMahon was said to be pleased with Ken and Piven's performance.
 
[quote name='mykevermin']Matt Striker needs to announce on a wrestling show I watch.[/QUOTE]

Agreed. I've caught him a few times on Supertstars and I've enjoyed it. Switch him with Grisham on SD since he's barely competent on his best day.
 
[quote name='neocisco']Agreed. I've caught him a few times on Supertstars and I've enjoyed it. Switch him with Grisham on SD since he's barely competent on his best day.[/QUOTE]

Striker is good for humor and interesting references but he is horrible at selling drama. Listen to him try to sell you on the seriousness of something and it just comes across as flat. Grisham does a much better job of making you believe the drama, which I believe he is getting across from working with JR.
 
[quote name='rickshankshaw']- Apparently Vince McMahon was seen laughing uncontrollably backstage during some of Dr. Ken's skits on RAW this week. McMahon was said to be pleased with Ken and Piven's performance.[/QUOTE]

I guarantee he was the only one that thought it was funny. I found them awkward at best. If true, it shows just how out of touch Vince is with his own product.

The only thing that redeemed their appearance was the heel turn at the end. The rest was pure crap.
 
[quote name='rickshankshaw']- Apparently Vince McMahon was seen laughing uncontrollably backstage during some of Dr. Ken's skits on RAW this week. McMahon was said to be pleased with Ken and Piven's performance.[/QUOTE]
Classic.
 
[quote name='rickshankshaw']Striker is good for humor and interesting references but he is horrible at selling drama. Listen to him try to sell you on the seriousness of something and it just comes across as flat. Grisham does a much better job of making you believe the drama, which I believe he is getting across from working with JR.[/QUOTE]
Agreed. Grisham has grown on me a bit, but that's understandable when the comparisons are Michael Cole and Josh Matthews.
 
WON news -
Bad news regarding Steve Williams, 49. Michael Carpenter reported that Williams left him a voice mail saying that he had a lengthy chemotherapy session that left him weak and hurting so bad he had a hard time walking. We had all thought he had beaten cancer so this is terrible news.
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Ed “Brutus Beefcake” Leslie, 52, was knocked out in a double-cross in what was supposed to be a worked boxing match for promoter Damon Feldman. Beefcake had been scheduled to face Tom Robinson months back on Feldman’s Celebrity Boxing show, and even though it was agreed it would be a work, since Leslie has plates in his face from a para-sailing accident and wouldn’t even allow pro wrestlers to do anything near his face. He ended up pulling out of the match. Apparently he was given a big offer at the last minute when Feldman needed a replacement for Jose Canseco against local Z list celebrity Bill “El Wingador” Simmons (a big, naturally tough guy known in the area for eating monstrous amount of chicken wings). Leslie would have never done the match if it wasn’t a work, but apparently Simmons sucker punched him and knocked him out in 22 seconds.
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Kurt Angle has been looking at getting on “Dancing with the Stars,” so he says. Of course, he says a lot of things. The cast will be announced on 8/17 and apparently he’s in the running,. A reporter friend of mine was speaking with Wade Schalles, a wrestling legend who helped coach Angle in his wrestling days, and still sees him regularly when Kurt is in Orlando. “Maybe a week ago, I saw him in front of me in the Orlando airport and called out to him. He couldn’t even turn his head because his neck was so bad.” When Schalles, and keep in mind, this is a guy he’s known since Angle was in high school, asked him where he was going, he said, “To go see Dana in Vegas.” He claimed White had offered him a six-fight deal for up to $12 million. It’s one thing to go on talk shows and talk like that, but to old coaches? . . The 8/6 TV show is supposed to be the best of the current cycle. The key was the big brawl that everyone was raving about, that Jim Cornette laid out.
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Piven must have been represented by M-1 Global, because 50% of the show was devoted to promoting his and Dr. Fred’s movie.
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News for today from the Observer site update -
--New Japan Pro Wrestling announced today that the Team 3-D IWGP tag title loss in TNA to Doug Williams & Brutus Magnus was not a sanctioned title match and Team 3-D are still the champions. However, Williams & Magnus are scheduled to defend the titles against Beer Money on the next TNA Hard Justice PPV on 8/16 in Orlando.
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Thank. God.

--Rodney King (yes, that Rodney King) is talking about doing Celebrity Boxing on 9/12 at a show in Boothwyn, PA. They are looking for unworthy opponents at [email protected]s e-mail address is being protected from spam bots, you need JavaScript enabled to view it You have to weigh at least 200 pounds.
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[quote name='rickshankshaw']Striker is good for humor and interesting references but he is horrible at selling drama. Listen to him try to sell you on the seriousness of something and it just comes across as flat. Grisham does a much better job of making you believe the drama, which I believe he is getting across from working with JR.[/QUOTE]

Shitcan Cole and put him on Raw, then, where there's no play-by-play guy.

BTW, Jim Ross' play-by-play is vastly over-rated.
 
-- A very audible "This Is Stupid" chant that took place during "The Abraham Washington Show" on last night's episode of ECW at Long Island's Nassau Coliseum was edited out by WWE's production staff. According to a fan in attendance, it was very loud and even stopped Zack Ryder while he was cutting his promo. (source: PWInsider.com)
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Couldn't agree more with the crowd, especially when the WWE insecurity team has to edit it.

[quote name='Brak']Any news on why they kicked The Miz off of RAW?[/QUOTE]
Probably because Vince still has a hard-on for Cena.
 
-- WWE officials are reportedly very high on the SmackDown! brand right now. At the July 31 meeting, which featured the Summerslam card overhaul that has been discussed in recent reports, those present greatly put over CM Punk, Jeff Hardy, Cryme Tyme, Chris Jericho and John Morrison. While RAW remains the flagship brand, the fact that recent SmackDown! episodes have drawn immense critical acclaim is not lost on WWE.

And fucking rightly so!
 
Just got tickets for the 10/6 Smackdown/ECW taping in Trenton :D, Row 10 on the floor. 40 each for 10th Row. Pretty good considering that floor seats for the HIAC PPV in Newark are 330.
 
[quote name='rickshankshaw']-- WWE officials are reportedly very high on the SmackDown! brand right now. At the July 31 meeting, which featured the Summerslam card overhaul that has been discussed in recent reports, those present greatly put over CM Punk, Jeff Hardy, Cryme Tyme, Chris Jericho and John Morrison. While RAW remains the flagship brand, the fact that recent SmackDown! episodes have drawn immense critical acclaim is not lost on WWE.

And fucking rightly so![/QUOTE]
That worries me.
 
WWE, fuck up something good?

kijinnmaru-inconceivable.jpg
 
Abraham Washington is the best new guy on the mic in a long, long time. The character is just held back by a PG rating. His putdowns are the best since The Rock was around.
 
Just a heads up, my local B&N had Foley's Hardcore Diaries on clearance for $6. I don't know if B&N does their clearances chainwide but if you're interested in the book it's probably worth checking.

[quote name='rickshankshaw']Striker is good for humor and interesting references but he is horrible at selling drama. Listen to him try to sell you on the seriousness of something and it just comes across as flat. Grisham does a much better job of making you believe the drama, which I believe he is getting across from working with JR.[/QUOTE]

My problem with Grisham is that he oversells the littlest things. He basically Chicken Littles the in-ring action to the point that when something genuinely big happens he sounds the same as he did during the 3rd match on the card.
 
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I'm kinda suprised that they did the talk show gimmick over the presidential gimmick he had in FCW. I guess it'll come out eventually when they grow bored of Tiffany in the general manager role.
 
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