An odd and very adult topic. Can excessive masterubation have side effects?

[quote name='MSI Magus']
I think its part of the reason I do it excessively, because it only takes me like 15-45 seconds to finish myself where most guys take several mins with lotion.[/QUOTE]

Jeez, that's got to be a record. And not the one you want to set, either.
 
[quote name='Strell 2.0']As the day goes on and the various lubricants stop being as effective (I'm rolling that tacky old-lube crud around between my fingers right now), you want to get it over with as quickly as possible. There are general desensitization issues to consider as well, so I consider it an acheivement to come in under 60 seconds anytime after 8pm.

Since Microsoft won't give me acheivement points for that, I keep a whiteboard with a tally next to the computer.[/quote]

2u46gq0.jpg
 
damn, do people actually set foot in your house? All those loads spurted has gotta make the place stank like a damn brothel. Seriously, get a fucking job...
 
Alright. Next Tuesday, I am going to shoot for the new high score. Barricading the door and putting blankets over the windows. Not coming out until I hit 35!
 
[quote name='Kendal']Alright. Next Tuesday, I am going to shoot for the new high score. Barricading the door and putting blankets over the windows. Not coming out until I hit 35![/quote]
A mixture of blood and semen will be left on your hands...
 
[quote name='Kendal']Alright. Next Tuesday, I am going to shoot for the new high score. Barricading the door and putting blankets over the windows. Not coming out until I hit 35![/quote]

image.php
 
I learned a few things from this thread:
1. Don't trade with MSI Magus because ANY spot on a game or booklet would be questionable
2. Some people think that a site for good deals on games just isnt enough! They gotta sex it up!
3. MSI Magus probably has more than just too much time on his hands

Seriously dude. I wish you luck with your "Problem" but you might want to get some psychological help That is NOT healthy. There is a psychological reason you are doing this. It goes way past the "It just feels good" excuse. It sounds like a classical case of obsessive compulsion. You must really want help because you are putting yourself out there for ridicule by asking the forum for info. I'm sure you could even find a 1-800 number to call or something. Get some help. Professional help.
 
[quote name='Theduck']This dude is so full of shit. Why are all of you falling for this?[/QUOTE]

Actually no...no im not. Why the hell would I make this up?

@kendal 35 is hardly the record. Nowdays I never go anywhere near that number...but shit whenever I was about 14 and we first got the internetnet I bet 3 times an hour was pretty average for the first few months. But hey, if nothing else go for 35 so you can tell these guys it is possible to hit those numbers in one day without hurting yourself.
 
[quote name='youbastards']Just think, he's done it at least 4-5 times while we've all been reading this thread... :cry:[/QUOTE]

Try aboout 10-12
 
[quote name='MSI Magus']
I think its part of the reason I do it excessively, because it only takes me like 15-45 seconds to finish myself where most guys take several mins with lotion.[/QUOTE]

Like this? (sorta SFW)
 
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My one time record is 14 times in 1 day.. just because I wanted to see what I was capable of :cool:
I am so awesome and sexy
 
Has anyone made a POPEYE reference yet!?!?

...wait..none of you have a clue who Popeye IS...do you. :p

NO, HE DONT MAKE CHICKEN.
 
Alright, treading territory that no one else has yet... although someone has referenced. Haha...
How? What is this super dee dooper special way, vague explanation would be appreciated. I'm just a bit floored that you are able to blow a load in under mere seconds.

Obviously you masturbate quite so often becuase you and your girl are having issues in the sexual department. Does she even know you do it that much? Seeing as how you don't go about wacking off when she is home from work shows me you're trying to hide it.
You two probably need to talk out your whole sex drive and possibly uping sex time a bit so you might not do it so often.

Probably no MAJOR side effects with obsessive masturbation but obviously too much of something can never be good in the long run.

And you might want to get over the threesome thing, girls sometimes say that just to lure you in, they won't actually go through with it most of the time. If you have to have it THAT bad, time to find a new girly.

Also, to prove a point. Not all girls hardly hand it out. I'd KILL to get it every day but at the moment my fiance and I average 3-4 times a week, which is just fine with me.
No, sex doesn't end after marriage, I have no friggun clue where that myth came from, if you're not having sex after you are married you might want to look into a divorce.

And on the whole potency issue... You're just sucking your sack dry is all I can think of. Which is once again, beyond me because I remember reading that guys produce that stuff pretty friggun quickly.

SO! Cut back, too much anything is a bad thing even if it's not obvious.
 
Let me break this down for you.

You ARE a loser. I'm not saying that with malice. Let's just look at the facts.

1) You don't have a job. Which doesn't in and of itself make you a loser. But spending all your time jerking off and posting about it on CAG sure as shit does make you one. Keep your dirty meat hooks off your dick for 5 minutes and go surf a job website.
2) You and your fiance aren't even married yet and sex is down to only 1-2 times a week. Although I seriously do not blame her for not wanting to fuck you because of point #1. After all she gets to go out everyday and support your worthless, not looking for a job, just jerking off all day ass. Why would she not want to come home and fuck her lazy shit boyfriend?

STOP JERKING OFF AND GO FIND A JOB! Maybe your fiance will regain some esteem for you and it won't be pity sex 1-2 times a week. And don't give me some bullshit about women not wanting sex as much. If yours doesn't, then you aren't doing it right. Or you are not compatible; move on.

And before you point out the hypocrisy of me spending my time reading your disturbing post. Realize that this thread is a fucking glaring train-wreck posted all over the front page in the popular forum section. I sure as fuck hope there is a way to filter out this off topic bullshit from that handy module.
 
[quote name='registered']Let me break this down for you.

You ARE a loser. I'm not saying that with malice. Let's just look at the facts.

1) You don't have a job. Which doesn't in and of itself make you a loser. But spending all your time jerking off and posting about it on CAG sure as shit does make you one. Keep your dirty meat hooks off your dick for 5 minutes and go surf a job website.
2) You and your fiance aren't even married yet and sex is down to only 1-2 times a week. Although I seriously do not blame her for not wanting to fuck you because of point #1. After all she gets to go out everyday and support your worthless, not looking for a job, just jerking off all day ass. Why would she not want to come home and fuck her lazy shit boyfriend?

STOP JERKING OFF AND GO FIND A JOB! Maybe your fiance will regain some esteem for you and it won't be pity sex 1-2 times a week. And don't give me some bullshit about women not wanting sex as much. If yours doesn't, then you aren't doing it right. Or you are not compatible; move on.

And before you point out the hypocrisy of me spending my time reading your disturbing post. Realize that this thread is a fucking glaring train-wreck posted all over the front page in the popular forum section. I sure as fuck hope there is a way to filter out this off topic bullshit from that handy module.[/QUOTE]

This guy is funny.
 
....ok, who put the "throbbing man meat" tag up there?????
 
[quote name='registered']bash[/quote]

IRC, there's a reason he can't work. Don't know what it is specifically but i think he gets Social Security checks.
 
[quote name='strongpimphand']....ok, who put the "throbbing man meat" tag up there?????[/quote]

I personally thought "bopping the bologna" was a bit funnier :lol:
 
[quote name='SerenityKry']Alright, treading territory that no one else has yet... although someone has referenced. Haha...
How? What is this super dee dooper special way, vague explanation would be appreciated. I'm just a bit floored that you are able to blow a load in under mere seconds.

Obviously you masturbate quite so often becuase you and your girl are having issues in the sexual department. Does she even know you do it that much? Seeing as how you don't go about wacking off when she is home from work shows me you're trying to hide it.
You two probably need to talk out your whole sex drive and possibly uping sex time a bit so you might not do it so often.

Probably no MAJOR side effects with obsessive masturbation but obviously too much of something can never be good in the long run.

And you might want to get over the threesome thing, girls sometimes say that just to lure you in, they won't actually go through with it most of the time. If you have to have it THAT bad, time to find a new girly.

Also, to prove a point. Not all girls hardly hand it out. I'd KILL to get it every day but at the moment my fiance and I average 3-4 times a week, which is just fine with me.
No, sex doesn't end after marriage, I have no friggun clue where that myth came from, if you're not having sex after you are married you might want to look into a divorce.

And on the whole potency issue... You're just sucking your sack dry is all I can think of. Which is once again, beyond me because I remember reading that guys produce that stuff pretty friggun quickly.

SO! Cut back, too much anything is a bad thing even if it's not obvious.[/QUOTE]

1. I wanked it before I met her and even when we first met and sex was great I wanked it frequently. Its not because of the issues. And sex is pretty frequent right now besides. We still have issues because there is no passion on her end(its just going through the motions to keep me happy)but sex is frequent.

2. The method...hmmm how to explain is difficult but then how to explain in a board friendly way more so. Ok gonna try this, mods appreciate that I dont have a history for lewd comments and im trying to keep it somewhat board friendly. Most people wrap their palm around the base and close their fingers as if making a fist then use some kind of lubricant(or do it dry which makes your wang hurt pretty fast). The way I do it is to take m right hand and put my thumb on top of the head and part way on the base upper side. My pointer and index fingers go on the underside of the head and again slightway on the base. Instead of doing this motion on the side pulling the skin really roughly I do it with my fingers pointing towards my groin. So the pulling motion is similar just the skin is tugged slightly differently and it doesnt hurt as much.

Dont know if this makes you understand it. Probally not and it deffitly took me quite awhile to ajust to doing it that way. Only reason I learned it in the first place was because I was fooling around with my girl one night and came across it.

3. Im mostly past the threesome thing. I never bring it up on my own anymore. But if she brings it up or the subject comes up in conversation it still is a sore spot. I mean I live my life compltly honestly, I really tend not to lie about stuff. Someone asked if my fiancee knows how much I masterbate and ya she does, she has known since like our 4th date because I really am just that honest with people about stuff. So that im so honest when people lie to me it really pisses me off. Sex is as I said an issue and part of it is because she lied about that and a few other things(saying she LOVES to have oral sex for example!). So again, getting better at moving on but its a double sore spot since sex is so important to me and because she lied.

4. God I hate you......seriously 3/4 times a week isnt enough for you.........Grah.........I hope our relationship gets to where she wants it that often forget about it not being enough.
 
I always hear radio advertisements for medical studies for various health conditions all the time. You know those ones where they promise to give you all of the medical treatments for free and compensate you for your time. If one ever comes up for chronic masturbation the OP could make a small fortune!! ;)

The war appropriation bill the president signed the other day also provides extended unemployment benefits. The OP could potentially get paid by his state to jerk it at home for 13 more weeks!
 
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Couple side notes on other posts.

getmeoutofjoliet - You need to change your avatar. Seriously it gives me impure thoughts and after this topic you all know you dont want that.

Registered - Piss off. Your either a very sad man or a troll(which is a very very very sad man). Spending your time flaming people online is so much sadder then having a sex/masterbation addiction and I dont work because of disabilities, though im sure you would just make fun of me for that. Dont bother responding please because people like mykevermin have taught me....its easier just to ignore you guys.

Pookymeister - Thanks. You didnt really defend me or anything but you remembered something about me and put it in a decent way. So thanks.

@ everyone hehe ya the tags are funny.
 
[quote name='Pookymeister']IRC, there's a reason he can't work. Don't know what it is specifically but i think he gets Social Security checks.[/quote]

I can't believe I'm spending more time on this, but where is the proof? I just took 30 seconds to do a search on his other posts and nothing about them supports your conclusion.

Plus, even if you are right. He seems capable of operating a keyboard and mouse. He could be getting a degree online and going into a different line of work.

I mean if I find out this guy is a bigger leech than he is already letting on to be, then I'm going pray my atheist ass off that he goes into a wild rage and rips his own balls off so that he can not contaminate the world.
 
[quote name='GTzerO']Hey, if it matters, could you tell me how you're disabled?

I'm disabled too.[/QUOTE]

Probably nothing as bad as you, I feel bad even talking about it most of the time because I feel like im not really.....but at the same time I cant seem to get past stuff. Anyways I have really bad panic attacks in public and under pressure situations. Iv also been labeled(hate labels and believe in working on symptoms instead) with something called aspegers and suffer from some bad swing depressions. Its mostly the damn panic attacks though.

Iv gotten better though. Used to be that just filling out a form at someplace as stupid as the doctors office or walking into a McDonalds set me off. Now I can actually go to the mall(and even have made 2 cedar point trips where I only had a few bad incidents)and while this sounds like something a 5 year old would say I can fill out forms on my own for most things(still freak out if its really important such as the few jobs Iv went for). The pressure situations are what really mess me up worse then anything now, that and loud places.

Sucks too, I thought at first it was just people and not pressure situations....that would make things really easy but nope. Iv gone back to school and was so pissed because I was able to deal with speach class and political debates trying to get a political science degree. Put anytime pressure was put on for something like the first speach, a presentation or a test....BAM Im getting sick and stuttering.

Edit - let the flamming begin! Heh anytime iv talked about this iv had people like myke or im guessing this time registered will fill his shoes flaming me like I screwed their mom or something.
 
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[quote name='registered']I can't believe I'm spending more time on this, but where is the proof? I just took 30 seconds to do a search on his other posts and nothing about them supports your conclusion.
[/quote]

But he did rub one out in that time frame.
 
I really don't mean any offense by this, but I'm not surprised someone with an FFX tattoo jacks it 10-30 times a day.

That being said, I don't think it could possibly be healthy for you. I know you've heard this from countless other posts before me but you should probably seek out some kind of help with self control.

What do you do if you're staying with a friend for a few days or something? Please don't tell me you wank it there in the guest bedroom or something.
 
[quote name='tokitoki50']What do you do if you're staying with a friend for a few days or something? Please don't tell me you wank it there in the guest bedroom or something.[/QUOTE]

:rofl:
Shoooo, I know I sure have.
When it's time, it's time!
 
[quote name='MSI Magus']getmeoutofjoliet - You need to change your avatar. Seriously it gives me impure thoughts and after this topic you all know you dont want that.[/quote]
:lol:

I really don't think there is a problem unless it is interfering with your daily life.
 
[quote name='lilboo']:rofl:
Shoooo, I know I sure have.
When it's time, it's time![/quote]


Well shucks, I appreciate your honesty at least. Was it at least in the shower or another place with an open floor drain? That seems the most courteous.
 
[quote name='lilboo']:rofl:
Shoooo, I know I sure have.
When it's time, it's time![/quote]
Are you being serious?

I'm pretty sure we've all done this at least once :whistle2:#
 
[quote name='tokitoki50']What do you do if you're staying with a friend for a few days or something? Please don't tell me you wank it there in the guest bedroom or something.[/quote]

hahahaha I have fewer friends whose house I haven't rubbed one out in, than ones that I have.

It's always boring at other peoples homes. They leave for a few hours or go to work, what am I supposed to do, just wait? No Sir.
 
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