JB - What are your thoughts about your match against Kurt in just a few days?
Jeff - I better be ready - I haven’t been in the ring in over two years and Kurt wrestles around the world on a nightly basis.
JB - IS THAT KURT’S GOLD MEDAL!?
Jeff - Yup, I got big plans for it tonight…
JB - BIG PLANS!?
Ad Guy - The TNA Originals, who started the tiny company, and the Veterans who gave it life - the only way to find respect is to turn to the eye of the monster! BUT THEY’LL HAVE TO GO THROUGH HELL TO GET THERE!
Tenay - This Sunday at Bound For Glory, it’s not about business - IT’S PERSONAL!
Cage - You know all I’ve been hearing is that I need to pick a side in the saga between the young superstars and the veterans in TNA. Well it’s like this - I’m the champ! And I’ll pick a side when I want to pick a side, or maybe I don’t want to, or better yet, unlike everyone else, I DON’T NEED to pick a side! (Booker comes out)
Tenay - When Booker T show up, two things come to mind - WHAT’S IN THE BRIEFCASE and what accent will he use?
Booker T - I just came out here to reason with you - try to persuade you Christian. We go Way back! We had many fights but that doesn’t matter - we’re from the same school. You took here and took AJ to another level! You made him who he is today! Now, the only thing he wants to do is take the spotlight for himself - DONCHU SEE, CHRISTIAN!?
AJ - CANCHA SEE WHAT HE’S DOING!? You know, I thought it was you who was the master manipulator, but whose getting manipulated now!? HE’S PULLING YOUR STRINGS LIKE A PUPPET! And you, you want to talk about respect, is it about respect or the spotlight!? Maybe in your home country, respect has a different meaning! SHUT UP! I DON’T WANT TO HEAR ANOTHER WORD OUTTA YOUR RIDICULOUS ACCENT!
Booker - LISTEN TO THE BASS IN HIS VOICE, HE DON’T RESPECT WITH! AJ, YOU DON’T KNOW WHO YOU ARE MESSING WITH!
AJ - I KNOW WHO I’M MESSING WITH - A WASHED-UP HAS-BEEN!
Booker - YOU SEE HOW HE’S TALKING TO YOU!
Cornette - Gentlemen, before this goes any further…
Tenay - THIS IS GONNA GET INTERESTING WITH THE ARRIVAL OF JIM CORNETTE!
Cornette - PIPE DOWN ALL 3 OF YA! I’m listening to ya throw slurs around and no one’s backing them up, so tonight, we got room for one more match! So tonight here on Impact, it’s gonna be Booker T against AJ Styles! (in African accent)YES, YOU ARE GOING TO WRESTLE TONIGHT YOU ARE! Christian, you feel left out, so in their match, are you on the left, right, or in-between - well we’re gonna find out! You are gonna be the special referee! WE ARE GONNA SETTLE THIS THING TONIGHT!
JB - Sting, people feel that the outcome of your match will change the face of TNA FOREVER!
Sting - Enough has been said, my match with Joe will be my biggest match ever - of my life. It’s not just about the TNA Title, and the glory and the applause, my reputation is on the line and I’m not just representing Sting or the veterans, I’m representing PEOPLE all over the U.S. who have been disrespected! The difference is that I’m gonna take a stand!
JB - If you don’t come out victorious…
Sting - That’s not an option!
Tenay - Tonight, MICK FOLEY ON KAREN’S ANGLE!
Tenay - THE BEAUTIFUL PEOPLE ARE EXPLOITING THE STIPULATION THAT THIS IS A NO-DQ MATCH!
DW - HE GETS GORED INTO THE TABLE BY CUTE KIP! CAN HE GET ON TOP OF HIM!?
JB - Kurt, I just saw Jeff’s office - he has your gold medal! HE HAS BIG PLANS FOR IT!?
Kurt - BIG PLANS!? WITH MY GOLD MEDAL!? WHAT’S HE UP TO - HE’S JUST LIKE HIS OLD MAN! Jeff’s not gonna sucker me in, and I’ll let him make the first move!
Tenay - IN THE GAME OF HUMAN CHESS, KURT ANGLE IS GONNA LET JEFF JARRETT MAKE THE FIRST MOVE!
Tenay - It’s the John and Yoko of TNA!
Tenay - MACHISMO RIGHT IN DUTT’S GRILL!
Bashir - I couldn’t think of a better opponent at TNA’s showcase of the year for the Middle Eastern Nightmare than the man who drapes himself in the red, white, and blue. Land of the free…home of the brave… WHO’S FREE, WHO’S BRAVE!? I PAID THE COST OF BEING AN AMERICAN WITH MY LIFE! I PAID FOR IT WITH MY WIFE, MY KIDS, AND GAVE ME A LETHAL INJECTION! MY PAIN WILL BECOME BLOODSHED! LADY AMERICA TORTURES ME WITH HER LIES, AND AT BOUND FOR GLORY, I WILL TORTURE YOU IN A MUCH, MUCH, MUCH MORE PHYSICAL WAY!
Mick - I’ll talk about how thrilled I am to be here. Last week, my nerves were in effect. It was one of the biggest night of my life - in some ways, it was the first day of the rest of my life. It seems like a place where a difference could be made - I didn’t get that sense in WWE, and possibly for selfish reasons, I wanted to make a difference. When you see guys like Sting who’ve rediscovered his passion, and Jeff saying he’s the founder of the company - that took more guts than anything I could ever. Kurt, who I made an argument for being the best ever - every night, he tries to be the best every single night. His greatest strength might be his greatest weakness in some ways. I think it bothers him that Jeff considers me to be the greatest acquisition - I disagree.
Karen - Jeff’s gone through a tough time for the past couple years.
Foley - It’s been a rough time, but my advice to him is to not let his emotions get the better of him. Maybe I can be a mentor of sorts to Jeff and I’ve learned from my mistakes and maybe he can as well.
Rhino - YOU KNOW WHAT, KIP JAMES, YOU’RE JUST GONNA BE THE APPETIZER! THIS IS GONNA BE A PPV THAT THE FANS ARE GONNA WANT TO PAY FOR BECAUSE I’M GONNA SET UP FOUR TABLES AND PLAY A VICIOUS GAME OF GORE THE WHORE!
Mongo - IT’S MONGO BACK AT YA! ARE YOU WONDERING WHY THEY CAME TO ME TO BE THE GUEST REFEREE FOR THE MONSTER’S BALL!? IT’S GONNA BE THE MOST BARBARIC MATCH EVER - RIGHT UP MY ALLEY! IT’S GONNA BE A SMASH MOUTH NIGHT!
Tenay - This Sunday will be only the FIFTH EVER MONSTER’S BALL, AND ABYSS IS THE ONE CONSTANT - HE’S BEEN IN ALL FOUR PREVIOUS ONES!
Tenay - DW, we’ve got some good news and bad news… The good news…
DW - Team 3D is coming out here.
Tenay - The bad news…
DW - They’re coming to the announce table!
Ray - I don’t even know if I’ll sit down - I MIGHT JUST STAND UP AND DO WHATEVER I WANT! You got a problem with that, West?
DW - No, we’re happy to have you here…
Tenay - I don’t know if you’ll be able to intimidate your opponents.
Ray - I agree with you for the first time you miserable old man.
Ray - Mongo is an enforcer for a match that I’m not really sure needs enforcing. I hope Mongo does a better job being an enforcer than he did as a football player.
Devon - We are 20 time tag team champions - best finisher in wrestling - 3D!
Ray - MY BROTHER, TESTIFY! Abyss is a big dumb something, I’m not sure what, but he’s causing Morgan to get his knee worked on.
Ray - Beer Money is going for the Beer Money suplex…and it doesn’t work.
Ray - Barb wire, bats, your mother - it doesn’t matter, we’re bringing everything but the kitchen sink!
Tenay - Think about the innovation in Team 3D - like the glass table!
Ray - Yeah, things might get a little… HOT at Bound For Glory. We might have some things up our sleeves - like lighter fluid.
Devon - And matches.
Devon - At Bound For Glory, we’ll be 21 time tag team champions! OH MY BROTHER, TESTIFY!
Tenay - THEY’LL CROSS THE LINE WITH MONSTER’S BALL AT BOUND FOR GLORY!
Cide - We don’t give a damn about those four gringos - we want Beer Money. We’re gonna elevate our hate! Beer Money, I swear to my Nana, you gonna get hurt! YO PUNKASS WILL BLEED!
Tenay - Some material on Karen’s Angle was edited from the original 45 MINUTE INTERVIEW! His only contractual obligation to TNA is to be the guest referee.
Foley - Okay, I guess I’d better address the question on everybody’s mind. What’ the deal with the sports jacket? As some of you may have seen, Brother Ray kidnapped and effectively bastardized the red and black flannel vest, so I ask all of you to bear with me stylistically while I try to come up with a new wardrobe. Now…(crowd chants Foley) it’s time to get serious. Thank you so much to everyone in the Impact Zone for making my debut something I will never forget. I’ve been fortunate to have many great moments and I’ve been telling guys last week that last week in the Impact Zone will hold a special place in my heart. I knew that last week, there was potential for a great moment to occur, there’s no way to guarantee it, but the elements were there, and at Bound For Glory, the elements are there when I step in the ring as the guest enforcer and I see Kurt Angle, possibly the greatest ever go head to head with Jeff Jarrett, returning after a 2-year absence, try to carve out a space for himself as one of the greatest ever. No one can guarantee a great match, but allies on each side, either friends of Kurt or Jeff’s, will be dealt with by the enforcer harshly! That much, I can guarantee you. With that in mind, let’s introduce the two contestants for this match at Bound For Glory.
Foley - Jeff… (fans chant welcome back) Jeff, Kurt, with so much on the line, if there’s anything you’d like to say…
Jeff - Kurt, TNA made a huge mistake in hiring you! But that’s just something I’ve got to live with - I’ll chalk that up to bad judgment, and even thought I didn’t want things to end up this way, they shouldn’t be any different. This is what you want, not me. Kurt, I got something that belongs to you - see you in Chicago! (he hands Angle his medal)
Foley - Kurt, any last words? (nothing is said) As Jeff said, I guess I’ll see you in Chicago. Shake hands. (they do)
Kurt - Jeff, hold on - I want to thank you for giving me back my medal. You did the right thing and I appreciate that. Can I ask you for one more favor? When you go home, tell your three little girls, tell them that I apologize. Because daddy’s not coming home after Bound For Glory.
DW - What a son of a bitch…
Tenay - Just when you think it couldn’t get any more personal, he pushes the envelope again. I’m not sure what’s more disgusting - the words or the smug look on his face!
Tenay - If there’s one wrestling PPV you buy in 2008 - MAKE IT BOUND FOR GLORY! THIS IS WHY!
DW - IT’S THE STEEL ASYLUM!
Tenay - RHINO, RHAKA KAHN, AND ODB AGAINST THE BEAUTIFUL PEOPLE IN A BIMBO BRAWL!
DW - TAYLOR WILDE DEFENDS THE KNOCKOUTS TITLE AGAINST AWESOME KONG AND ROXXI!
Tenay - JEFF JARRETT VERSUS KURT ANGLE WITH MICK FOLEY AS SPECIAL ENFORCER!
DW - AND STING VERSUS SAMOA JOE FOR THE TNA WORLD TITLE!
Ad Guy - Booker T has crossed the line from obscurity to IMMORTALITY!
JB - You are set to go against AJ - when this match happens, which side will Cage be on?
Booker - BOOKER KNOS EVERYTHING, AND TONIGHT, YOU WILL BE ON MY SIDE! CHRISTIAN, YOU ARE A CHAMPION! AJ IS GOOD FOR TWO THINGS - FEEDING THE CHICKENS AND PICKING UP THE DOG POOP! HE IS JEALOUS OF CHRISTIAN CAGE AND BOO-KAH! TONIGHT, I WILL PROVE TO AJ STYLE THAT HE IS IN THE RING WITH A LIVING LEGEND!
Sharmell - Booker will reveal the contents of the case.
Booker - Only when the time is right…and the time is approaching! MORE INTRIGUE!
DW - Last week, IN AN INCREDIBLE SWERVE, ROXXI WAS DRESSED AS RAESHA SAEED!
Tenay - As if Sting-Joe wasn’t enough, tonight, a SPECIAL CLAUSE WILL BE ADDED!
DW - WHAT WILL BE THE SPECIAL CLAUSE!?
Tenay - THE REFEREE SHIRT THAT CHRISTIAN CAGE PROJECTS AUTHORITY!
DW - Let’s look at the cadence of Christian’s count to see if he favors one over the other!
Tenay - FLYING ARM BAR, BUT BOOKER… (in a disgusted tone)GETS THE ROAP BREAK!!
Cornette - WAIT A MINUTE! WHAT THE HELL’S GOING ON AROUND HERE!? I WANTED TO SETTLE EVERYTHING TONIGHT AND WE DIDN’T SETTLE ANYTHING! SO WE’RE GONNA SETTLE THINGS ON SUNDAY NIGHT! IT’S GONNA BE AJ, CHRISTIAN CAGE, AND BOOKER T 3 WAY DANCE! YOU FIGURE IT OUT!
Tenay - I DIDN’T THINK IT WAS POSSIBLE, BUT BOUND FOR GLORY JUST GOT BIGGER!
(during SmackDown ad)Foley - FRIDAY NIGHTS WILL NEVER BE THE SAME!
Cornette - Ladies and gentlemen, the most anticipated TNA Title match in recent memory takes place at Bound For Glory, with Joe, the world champion, putting his title on the line against Sting. LET’S GET ‘EM IN THE RING!
Tenay - The differences will all be resolved THIS SUNDAY AT BOUND FOR GLORY!
Cornette - You’ve agreed to the rules of the match, and I want to call your attention to the one specific clause that you asked to be added - after your match, win, lose, or draw, THERE WILL BE NO REMATCH!
DW - THAT’S WHAT WE’VE BEEN WAITING TO HEAR!
Cornette - Just affix your names to the contract. Sting, as the challenger, go first. Joe, as the world champion, the eyes of the world will be on you this Sunday night. Your signature for the contract… I can say it’s executed right here! All that remains is to have the match - any last comments?
Sting - Joe, it didn’t have to be this way, but here we are. It is what it is, so I’ll see you at Bound For Glory.
Cornette - Joe, do you respond?
Joe - Stinger, you do what you need to do - I’m gonna do what I need to do. You’re probably wondering why I haven’t put my hands on you? Why I’m not stomping you into the mat - because if Kev taught me anything, it’s that above all, you be professional. And professionally speaking, Sting, you’re wrong about me - I do respect you. (they shake hands, Joe head butts him)
Tenay - DIDJA SEE THAT!? THE EMOTION, THE DRAMA THAT WE’VE WITNESS HAS BEEN UNPARALLELED AND JOE’S A POWDER KEG WAITING TO EXPLODE AND HE DID!
DW - YOU CAN JUST FEEL THE HATRED!!!!!
Tenay - BOUND FOR GLORY WILL CHANGE THE FACE OF TNA FOREVER!